Tag Archives: mindset

Using Your Words and Internal Dialogue to Lose Weight

How to Use Your Words To Change Eating Habits

The, words, that I used all the time was “I shouldn’t have eaten that”.  Then I always pray to God for help to stop me from, binge eating.  I didn’t want to, eat, all of that food, so I became like almost obsessive about, dieting, and my, relationship with food and how to, lose weight.

My guest today is Isabel Chiara.

This post is about transforming self-destructive eating behaviors with self-compassionate dialogue allowing you to, lose weight.

Listen to the full interview here:

https://www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/episodes/9356698

 

Introduction Eat Your Words

Isabel’s new book EAT YOUR WORDS is not the typical, self-help diet book, Instead, Isabel’s approach is a more narrative, semi-autobiographical exploration of the sensual-and-painful relationship to food so many of us can’t escape. The book expertly coaches from life lessons and experiences of the uber-relatable curvaceous girl entry into womanhood.  Her hearty Italian appetite make for a complex-carb tale about the depth of our relationship with self-nourishment.

Myrna: Isabel, can you share with our listeners your own journey through, body shaming,  and self-discovery?

Isabel: Of course. In my own journey, food, eating and, dieting, has always been a big point of contention my whole life. It was through this non-acceptable way that I eat and always focus on the food. I always guilty after eating,  like I shouldn’t have eaten it. My internal dialogue was always on how to, lose weight.

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Transform Your Mind Amazon
Transform Your Mind Amazon

Your Words are important if you want to Lose weight

The, words, that I used all the time was “I shouldn’t have eaten that”.  Then I always pray to God for help to stop me from, binge eating.  I didn’t want to, eat, all of that food, so I became like almost obsessive about, dieting, and my, relationship with food and how to, lose weight.

I started using, words, like there’s a certain way to, eat, there’s a certain way to be with food, and, diet. Each day I try to do it, there was always a new, diet. That is what has been the journey of my life. It’s been a journey of the kind of needs to come to terms with on some level and I think the, body shaming, was me telling myself my body is this way because I ate all that food and that was no way to, lose weight.

Many times in my book, my main character, I say she’s walking around with no head. This is to highlight that sometimes we are disconnected our head from our body.  It’s a very common feeling or a life existence that is happening on some level. It’s kind of introspection book on the whole journey of the, body shaming, and coming to terms with the body, mind and spirit on some level.

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Lose weight: Stop the negative self talk

Myrna: How did you transition from walking around kind of discombobulated – which is a word where you’re not connected and then you got to the point where you’re going to, eat your words, because you’re not going to be telling yourself these negative things about food. What was your transition? Did you go to a Therapist to start to, lose weight?

Isabel: There have been a million people involved in this process, because you’re always a person with focus and you’re always trying to come up with a resolution to stop, self destructive eating and how to, lose weight.   It’s almost like I became a researcher. It was really a journey of finding what was really in my own soul, what was I really like?

  • What’s up with me?
  • What’s bothering me?
  • What’s the pain about?
  • What am I trying to stuff down with food?
  • Why can’t I, lose weight?
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Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

The Mind Body Connection to Lose Weight

If your body and mind are disconnected, you can’t even figure out what your, words, are saying to you.  I saying to myself on a daily basis, a lot of negative, words, about myself and my body. I saying these, words, to myself before I, eat, and after I, eat.

What happens is when you take yourself to task on some level, when you start to really become conscious,  you notice your, words. First thing I became conscious was I knew I needed to be in my body.  Because when you are out of your body you eat unconsciously.  For different people, it’s different things. I started to work out because I needed to feel my body and I was out of it. You can’t, lose weight, if you are not in your body.

The other thing was, as long as you’re feeling your body, then you get to hear your, words, and what you’re saying to yourself. So, the, words, started to become more conscious. What I have realized lately is that to be out of your body, you have to be really busy with things. If you’re busy, then you also have those, words, that are saying – oh! I’m so busy, I didn’t, eat, all day long and I’m starving. Now, I have a permission to just, eat, whatever I want, wherever I want and it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter which  is what we say to ourselves. So you sabotage your efforts to, lose weight.

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Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora
Transform Your Mind Podcast Pandora

Self destructive Eating

Myrna: Where did your, self destructive eating, habits come from? I know you mentioned that you’re Italian and, Italian food, has a lot of carbs and pastas and things like that. Is that where your, eating habits, came from?

Isabel:  Yes, except for Italians are for the most part are thin! I mean I’m in the restaurant business. I started my whole life in a family restaurant business, so my focus in life became food. At an early age, when we made food, we made huge meals. I never knew what a, portion size, was like. I never used the, words,  portion size, until I was in my 30s and 40s!

I would go to my friend’s homes and they would have like a bit of rice, or a bit of meat. I was like confused when I was younger, because that was never what happened at our house. I understand now the, portion size, mentality that really showed up in my whole scope of thought. My whole thought pattern shifted and I became conscious that large portion sizes defeats my ability to, lose weight.

I was no longer eating like I was at an you can eat buffet.   My, eating habits, as a child made me end up with this  buffet mentality.

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Coping with Words and Body Shaming

Myrna:  At some point in time, you developed, body shame. You took me through your self-discovery, how did you use your, words, to stop, body shaming and accepting that you are a curvaceous girl?

Isabel:  Body shaming,  comes when you start a comparison with other people who are a certain size. You see people in a certain way and then you start looking at yourself as different. Each time you talk to people, you’re like wait, why don’t I look like you? But it doesn’t matter because we already internalized that there’s something wrong with us and that we need to, lose weight.

Whatever we look like, we want to be someone else. People start to say oh, for a little girly you’re eating a lot. Then you start to make a correlation with; I’m eating a lot, there’s weight here and there’s something wrong with what’s happening in me. I’m not okay and that’s how one starts to develop, body shame.

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Self destructive binge eating

Myrna: Why do you think we purposely distract ourselves when making food choices to the detriment of our health and, binge eating?

Isabel: I’m not a psychologist, I just know. I’ve been looking at this behavior for a long time. What I think is that we distract ourselves because we don’t want to feel the things that is going on in our life. I think a lot of times, when we do choose, binge eating, we are actually eating food as a distraction.

Maybe the right hand doesn’t know what the left hand is doing kind of thing. A lot of times, we start to, eat, because we start to feel something’s coming up. It doesn’t matter what it is, it could be happy, it could be sad, it could be like anger and/or even bored. I, eat, when I’m bored.

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Google Podcast Transform Your Mind
Google Podcast Transform Your Mind

Notice what going on in your body before you eat that food

When there’s nothing going on, there’s still something going on in your body. If there’s something going on your body, but you’re not present to it or you don’t want to know what it is or what for every reason, you’re not used to it.   I think a lot of times people don’t recognize their feelings or they judge their feelings.

I’m a night time eater. I could do all day long with no food (because every emotion from the day maybe was just piled up), but at night, I’m like a wreck for that. Not for nighttime or for that one time and it’s all starting to come up and then we’re like let’s just go for it and we start, binge eating.

Myrna: Yes, that has been my biggest struggle for a long period of time. I couldn’t stop eating at night. It’s a little under control now, but that was my biggest struggle for a while.

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Diet and Nutrition

Isabel: I decided to lose the word, diet. I decided to do something different for myself which eventually added more nourishment and nutrition to my day.  I first started with being in my body, and then I used my, words, to say let me give myself food instead of saying, I’m going to take away food and I’m not going to eat this.

I started giving myself different foods, I allowed myself to have more nutritious foods and I started creating a new mindset. This new mindset was alright. I was totally resistant to this, but I started finding a place that had green drinks. I could have green drinks which took the edge off of hunger and it made me feel in my body.  So,  instead of going into the business of my whole day, I’m going to add a green drink. Just one thing, I added nutrition instead of taking something away,  I was going to give myself things.

If someone once likes eating at night, instead of having the bad things we want to, eat, at night you and what would you give what did you give yourself to replace that because a green drink. Just starting to give yourself other more nutritional things maybe you want to give yourself more vegetables than that and rice.

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Transform your Mind Podcast Index
Transform your Mind Podcast Index

Using Your Words to Change your Mindset

Myrna: How can those of us struggling with, weight gain, and a pure relationship to food face the issue head-on?

Isabel: The first thing I say is to, change your mindset.  Start creating an intention for yourself and start creating a, mindset, that you’re in the middle of the process. I always like to say we’re always in the middle of the process and that we are shifting. We’re always shifting and we’re always changing, even though it looks really bad – it always looks really bad before it gets really good. We’re going to start to use the right, words.

Myrna: Tell us about your book “Eat Your Words”, why you wrote it and what do you want someone that’s reading it to walk away with?

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Book: Eat your Words

Book Eat Your Words
Book Eat Your Words

Isabel: The book was a way to be conscious for myself like it really was. I wrote it for myself like a journal. I was really writing a book, but it was the stories of my life. So the goal was for me to get to some kind of resolution in my life. The stories are for people to really understand that they’re not struggling in this arena by themselves. This is really to bring the behaviors to consciousness and to show anybody that he/she is not the only one going through this. I mean most of the world is going through this on some level.

Now you become conscious of what the, words, are and how they affected our behaviors and through that, there is healing that can be done when you see something that somebody else is doing and you hear what their process is. I bring up a lot of processes.

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Myrna: Where does the, “Eat Your Words,” come from? I’m assuming it’s internal dialogue.

Isabel: “Eat Your Words,” is internal dialogue and it starts at the origins of the family.

Myrna: It’s all about inner dialogue? But the inner dialogue as you can imagine is kind of runs your life and it could be conscious or unconscious.

Isabel: It wasn’t so sometimes.

Myrna: It’s unconscious right?

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Isabel: It was the, words, that I would say, as my mantra was, oh I don’t care. The biggest, words, were “oh I don’t care”. However, once you start saying I don’t care, it doesn’t just apply to what you are eating.   It really becomes what you start to say to yourself, the, words, you use.

  • I don’t care,
  • Oh I don’t care about myself
  • So I don’t care what I put in my body.
  • Anyway I don’t care what becomes of my life.
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Conclusion

Myrna: How can readers connect with you and get a copy of your book?

Isabel: If anyone wants to get the first chapter of my book, just to see if they like it or if it works for them, they can go to https://isabel-chiara.com, on that page, they could download the first chapter for free or they could just buy the book on Amazon.

We also have a membership site called Healing and Activation Process Integrations. Happy place is what I call it. It’s going to be a lot of processes that are going to help people to get inside of themselves. It can move things and look at things differently and channel them differently.

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Transform Your Mind PTWWN TV
Transform Your Mind PTWWN TV

How To Unlock Your Full Potential: Overcoming the Fear of Failure

David Nurse, an NBA Mindset coach and bestselling author, joins host Myrna Young to discuss overcoming the, fear of failure, so you can, unlock your full potential. We explore eight, archetypes of fear, that hinder action: including the burned, the blamer, and the perfectionist. David shares insights from his book “Do It: The Life-Changing Power of Taking Action” and offers practical tools for overcoming these, archetypes of fear. He emphasizes the need to embrace imperfection and take consistent action to achieve success.

 

Unlock your full potential with a growth mindset

Myrna: The common thread in all your books is mindset. Why do you think a, growth mindset, is so important to our success?

David: Having a, growth mindset, is so important because really, when you break down life, it is simple.  Life starts off simple. When you’re a kid, you’re just playing. You don’t have worries, stresses, anxieties.

But as you get older, get into a job, into relationships, everything becomes so complicated. But if you peel back the layers of the onion of life, it actually is very simple. And it just comes down to perspective, how you view each situation. You can’t take it all in once. It’s just step by step. It’s like taking a step forward with a flood lamp where you can only see a little bit in front of you. You can’t see the whole picture.

Having a, growth mindset, is a crucial factor in determining our success. It shapes our perspective and how we approach challenges and opportunities.

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How athletes unlock their full potential with mindset growth

Myrna: So as a mindset coach for athletes, before we go into, growth mindset , off the court, let talk about, growth mindset, on the court.  Because we can transition everything in life, whether it’s having a, growth mindset, on the court, or having a, growth mindset, in the boardroom. So let’s stick with the sports analogy for a while because I never played professional sports. But let’s say I’m thinking of a mindset like Michael Jordan.  I know, when he got into the league, he was benched.

Nobody thought he was good, or even Tom Brady, he was a scrawny kid. And actually, now that I started to talk, I’m thinking of all these guys. And I just finished watching the Netflix documentary on  Stephen Curry biography. And of course, that’s a perfect one to look at. This scrawny little kid, and everybody is counting him out because he’s tiny, he’s small, and then he starts playing. And what he said to himself is, I’m just good at these guys. I just need to grow a little more.

So tell us about how that kind of, growth mindset, helps you go from everybody is counting you out to being the top of your game?

Transform Your Mind Amazon
Transform Your Mind Amazon

How Stephen Curry unlocked his full potential and changed the game

David: Yeah, absolutely. And it’s so interesting to see these top athletes to ever play their sports. A lot of them were counted out or they were underestimated. And it’s actually one of the archetypes in Do It: The Life Changing Power of Taking Action that I talk about, because we are either people who says, Why me? Others say, Why not me? Why can’t I be the best at what I’m doing? Why don’t I deserve a great life? That’s the difference between a, growth mindset vs a fixed mindset. 

So it’s great that you brought up Curry, as I give this example in talks and I show this slide about when Steph Curry was coming out of college, his scouting report, and you could Google search this, you’ll just start laughing. It said, undersized, not quick enough, probably will be a backup,  he’ll be lucky to even play in the NBA. And Curry goes on to transcend the way an entire sport is played, which didn’t shoot as many threes until Steph Curry came to the game. He literally took a sport that been going on for years and changed the way it was played. That is, how to overcome self-doubt and unlock your full potential.

Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM
Transform Your Mind Podcast Player FM

The archetypes of fear

Myrna: So today we want to talk a bit about the, fear of failure, which I think is so important. Your book Do It talks about the, fear of failure, in, unlocking our full potential. And you said that you’ve identified eight archetypes that are the cause of inaction. These archetypes could also be called the, fear of failure. The first one is The Burned.

I’m assuming that you mean that someone burned me, so I’m not going to do anything. Which is the, enemy of progress. Another one is The Blamer, I know that one because even this morning, I was telling my son to stop going around blaming others, it’s one of the worst things that you can do.  And then there is The perfectionist. The people with, type A personality. I understand, The Blamer, and, The Perfectionist. Not so much about, The Burned. So talk to us about these eight, archetypes of fear, that are the, enemies of inaction.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

To overcome the enemy of inaction we must release fear

David: So the, enemy of inaction, is fear. Ultimately, it is, fear of uncertainty. It’s, fear of failure. We don’t take action because we don’t know what’s on the other side of that action. If you were guaranteed results, you would do that. But it’s uncertain. So there’s actually eight, archetypes of fear, that I outlined, those are just the top three. I’ll just go through the eight.

If you’re struggling, if you’re held back, if you’re stuck, you can understand why and be able to break through that and take action. So the archetypes are the allodoxaphobia, which is just a cool way to say, fear of other people’s opinions.

The following archetypes are the, enemy of inaction. We need to recognize them to, unlock our full potential.

Book Do it
Book Do it
The archetypes of inaction
  1. The Burned archetype refers to individuals who have been hurt or disappointed in the past and are afraid to take action again. They may have experienced failure or rejection, and this has created a, fear of failure. If you are going to, unlock your full potential, you need to start  addressing this by separating the past from the present and adopting a reverse alter ego. By giving the past a silly name, we can distance ourselves from the negative experiences and move forward with a fresh perspective.

2. The Blamer archetype is characterized by individuals who constantly blame others for their current situation.  We can never, unlock our full potential, if we refuse to take responsibility for our actions and believe that external factors are the cause of their lack of progress. I emphasize the importance of personal accountability and encourages individuals to take ownership of their choices and outcomes.

3. The Perfectionist archetype is driven by the need for everything to be perfect.  Type A personalities, fall into to, the perfectionist archetype. These individuals set impossibly high standards for themselves and are often paralyzed by the, fear of failure.  You can never, unlock your full potential, if you have a, fear of failure. I advise my clients to embrace the, 90% theory, which allows for imperfection and acknowledges that nothing will ever be perfect. By focusing on giving 90% effort and accepting that mistakes are part of the learning process, individuals can overcome the, perfectionist mindset, and take action.

The other archetypes of inaction

4. The Believer archetype, organize their lives around their belief systems. When asked why they believe in a certain way, many Believers will simply reply, “Because it’s true.” They have their own way of coming to conclusions and these ways often defy reason and/or are difficult to convey because they are based on a feeling.is kind of interesting.  Check out, the Believer Archetype, on  Myers Briggs .

5. The Inopportune archetype , which means you think you’re either too old or too young. Timing is just not right. Tjis becomes the reason for inaction.

6.  The introvert  believes he is introverted, so he can’t go out and talk to people.  Introverted or extroverted has nothing to do with whether you talk to people or not? It’s just how you recharge. Do you recharge by yourself or do you recharge with others?

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7. The scarcity archetype, where you have a, scarcity mindset. There’s only one slice of the pie that you feel like you just have to hold on to all you got and you can’t share anything with anybody else, because if you do, it’s all going to be gone.

8. The distracted archetype, and I don’t even mean by distracted of like our phones or the notifications or all these things that we have of being constantly on in this world that we live in. But even more the distraction of not knowing what your vision, your mission, your purpose is. And that’s your, enemy of inaction.  The enemy of, unlocking your potential.

Conclusion

In conclusion, unlocking our full potential, requires a shift in mindset. We must, overcome the enemy of inaction, which is often fueled by fear and negative thought patterns. By addressing the burned, blamer, and perfectionist archetypes, we can break free from these limiting beliefs and take action towards our goals. Remember, the mind is a powerful tool, and by harnessing its potential, we can transform our lives and achieve greatness.

Additional Resources

https://blog.myhelps.us/shamelessly-persistent-keep-knocking-until-door-opened/

 

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Why is Transformation Of Your Mind Important?

When we talk about the, transformation, of the mind, it is not simply about changing or adjusting how you think, but renewing your sense of, self-consciousness. Transformation, of your mind, impacts your conscience, which is your sense of what is right and wrong. It impacts your heart, which in Hebrew literature is the center of your being.

Transformation, of your mind, runs much deeper than simply making confessions and changing how you think upon a thing.  Apostle Paul teaches “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind”

Pastor William L Glover speaks on the biblical principles of what God meant when He said “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”

Listen to the full interview here:

https://www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/8876218

Pastor Glover just completed a powerful series on, renewing the mind, it was a four part series, you can watch the full series on the Mount Hermon Ministries YouTube Channel. But today we’re going to pick some of the important pieces of that, renewing your mind, series to share with you.

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Bio and Intro for Pastor William L Glover

Dr. William L. Glover is the Senior Pastor of Mount Hermon Ministries. He also oversees the Dew of Hermon Early Learning Center and is Campus Director of Life Christian University at Mount Hermon Ministries. He has a strong mandate for Education, Missions, Leadership Development, Justice Ministry and reaching the lost for Christ.

Having ministered in nine different countries on 29 international trips, Dr. Glover is an anointed teacher, preacher, and international speaker. He has assembled ministry and medical teams that have seen thousands of souls saved and thousands more received desperately needed medical care.  His passion is to reach the globe, but God has fashioned his heart in the shape of Africa.

Through Mount Hermon Ministries, he is very involved in reaching his community through educational empowerment.  He is a founding board member of L.I.F.E (Lee Interfaith for Empowerment), a Network of Congregations committed to finding solutions to systemic justice issues in Lee County; is an Executive Board Member of Healthy Lee, a group of faith, business and health professions committed to inspiring healthy life styles, and chairs the Religious Affairs Committee of the local branch of the NAACP. Dr. Glover is also Co-Founder (with Pastor Cheryl Glover) of Redeeming Influence Community Outreach, a non-profit that serves blighted communities.

Dr. Glover has earned a Bachelor of Arts degree in Bible and Theology from Southeastern University (formally Bible College), a Master of Arts degree in Religion from Florida State University, a Master of Education degree in counseling from Florida A & M University, and his Doctor of Ministry degree in Theology from Life Christian University.

Dr. Glover is also the author of the three books: Justice: God, Nations, and Systemswhich examines the role of faith in addressing systemic justice issues which plague the systems of men; 30 Days of Excellence, a daily devotional that focuses on cultivating a culture of excellence in Faith, in Speech and in Life; and Ready for the Harvest, a study on how to release the principle of seedtime and harvest into your life.

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Dr. Glover is married to Pastor Cheryl Glover. Four wonderful adult children enhance their lives: Brittney, Jade, Jana and William II. Dr. Glover credits God for His demonstration of goodness and continues to trust in His faithfulness throughout his Pastoral Ministry.

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What Does God Mean By Renewing the Mind

Myrna – My first question to you Pastor Glover  is why did why do you think God wanted you to preach on, renewing your mind?

Pastor Glover – that’s an excellent question Myrna. I ended the 2020 year with a series of messages entitled, living in your redemption. The idea being that God had already paid the price for redemption and that he’s redeemed our lives from destruction.

Whatever destruction has occurred in our lives, be it:

  • personal,
  • financial,
  • relational
  • emotional
  • mental

 

God has already invested in the price to redeem and restore us from that destruction. That message was received so well that I began to contemplate well how do I get people to embrace that, mindset, and the, renewing your mind, messages were born. If a person can hear something, but if it’s not internalized and if it’s not received, then it’s not going to have an impact on their lives.

So that series of, transformation, of your mind, messages was born out of that realization of moving people from the point of where they are, to living in the redemption and, renewing their minds.

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Transformation of  the 3 parts of your mind

Myrna – you talked about the three different parts of the, mind, that God wants transformed.

Can you share with us the three different parts of the, mind?

Pastor Glover – Sure there are different aspects to each individual sermon, but the broad overview is the reason the, mind, is important is found in the wisdom literature. Scripture reveals that the, mind, is connected to and influences:

  • our psyche
  • our conscious
  • and our heart

When we talk about, renewing of the mind, it is not simply about changing or adjusting how you think, but it impacts your sense of, self-consciousness. It impacts your, conscience, which is your sense of what is right and wrong. It impacts your heart, which in Hebrew literature is the center of your being.

So, renewing your mind, runs much deeper than simply making confessions and changing how you think upon a thing.  Apostle Paul teaches “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the, renewing of your mind”

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There are 3 action verbs in this sentence.

  • transformed
  • renewing of the mind
  • conformed

One is internal and one is external.  It impacts our, psyche, our consciousness, and our heart.  So it is the, transformation, of the total person, the total being.

What is the Flexible mind, the Fluid Mind and the Fixed Mind?

We need to have a conversation about what kind of, mindset, you are working with.

  • Is your, mindset, flexible?
  • Is your, mindset, fluid?
  • Or do you have a, fixed mindset? Which could be good or bad depending on what it’s fixed on.

When we talk about the, psyche, the, psyche, being your sense of, self-consciousness. Why do we need, renewing of your mind, in your sense of, self-consciousness? Because it’s our sense of awareness, our sense of, self-worth. It also is our mental and emotional health, so if your, mind, is not flexible, you need work in your sense of awareness.

 

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The Flexible Mindset is best for Transformation

Some people who are not self-aware or there’s some people who suffer from, low self-esteem, or there’s some people who are damaged mentally and emotionally. If you don’t have a, flexible mindset, which means pliable then you will resist God doing the eternal work in your, psyche, to, transform your mind.  So, in order for, transformation, to occur you have to have a, flexible mindset.

There can be no, transformation, if you’re unwilling to change.

The Fluid Mindset

Conversely a, fluid mindset, means that you are evolving, you are open to change. If you don’t have a, fluid mindset, you internalize and have what some call “stinking thinking.” You have a toxic, mindset, about yourself or about people. For instance oftentimes when people experience hurt in a relationship, they’ll say I’ll never trust another man again or I’ll never trust another woman again.

So, if you don’t have a, fluid mindset, you’re not willing to let that, transformation, happen and embrace truth.

The Fixed Mindset

The third, mindset, you mentioned was a, fixed mindset. Just like when we lay concrete, we have to do the work before the concrete sets, because once it sets it’s fixed. So, we have to be careful what we let set in our minds. We have to do the work while the concrete is fluid and pliable.

A, fixed mindset, is like set concrete.

Transformation, of the mind, is like renovation of a house. You’ve got to rip out things, knock down walls or beliefs before you can put in the new things or new learnings.

When we’re inviting God to, transform your mind, then we have to understand our, psyche, our, self-consciousness, and our heart. That’s why the, mind, is so important because it is connected to all of these aspects of the human person and they’re all interrelated yet distinct.

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The Fixed Mindset is Like Concrete

Myrna – Someone with a, fixed mindset, like concrete why did you say that God can use this person?

In the, Life coaching, world, when we talk about a, fixed mindset, we’re saying that there’s no growth in this person. But if your, mind, is set like concrete, is it possible for it to be changed?

Pastor Glover – Well yes but again you must have awareness of your, fixed mindset. You can get at that concrete two different ways. Through, transformation, which speaks to internal work that has to be done. The word, transformation, comes from the Greek word metamorphosis and so that speaks of going through a, transformation, but it starts from the inside out.

The other word that’s used is, renewing, which literally has to do with renovating. When concrete sets, the only way to change it is to get a jackhammer and that’s very painful work. People oftentimes will not choose to do that work, because it is painful, noisy, and messy. But if you’re going to lay a new foundation in your life, you must do the, mental, emotional and spiritual work to jackhammer a, fixed mindset.

Myrna – How can God jackhammer to change that, fixed mindset?

Fixed mindset in  marital relationships

Pastor Glover – I think an example in the context of, relationships, particularly in the context of, marital relationships, a lot of work that has to be jackhammered in counseling sessions really has to do those, fixed mindsets, about marriage that have been set, but are toxic and are not healthy.

Couples have very different ideas about the foundation of a, marriage, and what it should be about. It is really about how men and women are socialized in our society. Young girls are socialized towards inter interdependent relationships. That’s means they play together, they share much more readily than men do.  They are invested in group success as they are reared and everybody kind of having a good time.

Boys are socialized totally different. They are taught to stand on your own two feet, be independent. Be a man, don’t share your emotions. So, men are much less equipped than women in, marital relationships, to handle a, fixed mindset, that’s why women are 10 times more verbal than men.

One of the fun exercises I like to do when I’m dealing with, communication, is I’ll ask the man and the woman to get a sheet of paper and have each one writes me all the feeling words they are aware of. The woman’s list is four times longer than the man,

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How can God Use a Fixed Mindset?

I’m curious though you also say in your message that God can use a, fixed mindset.

Pastor Glover – When you lay concrete, it’s properly set, it is suitable for what you want to build on it. So, let’s pull in this conversation, purpose and destiny. If you have great purpose or great destiny, you have to take the time to lay the foundation. If your foundation is fixed, God can build on it.

People do not take the time to factor in the type of foundation they need to lay to accommodate their dreams and visions of what they want. That can be applied to anything, in my book “30 Days of Excellence”  I teach that excellence is in the foundation that you lay for, purpose and destiny.

Be ye not conformed to the world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

Why did God say that do not be transformed to the world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind?

The World is Battling for your Mind

Pastor William L Glover – Because it is all a battle for the, mind. This simple principle is found in Proverbs.

“As a man thinketh so is he”

  • Your, mindset, determines the reflection of who you are and it determines who you will be.
  • We would never be greater than our thoughts about things.
  • We would never rise above our thoughts about things.
  • We will never allow ourselves to be pulled beneath our thoughts about things.
  • Our thoughts reflect where we are going.

It’s a battle for your, mind. The world we live in today, people don’t want to do the work, to think for themselves. There is professional, think tanks, and these, think tanks, think for people and feed them what to believe, what to say.

They all are vying for our, minds, we don’t tune in to learn anymore from the news,  we tune in to determine what we need to think. So, hence “do not be conformed to the world, but be transformed by the, renewing of your mind.

That, transformation,

  • happens through the word of God,
  • that, transformation, happens through your relationship with God
  • that, transformation, happens through a community of faith like-minded believers who are committed to growth.

Transformation is from the heart.

Your, heart, which is the center of your being, the seat of your soul and this is important because wisdom literature teaches us that we should guard your heart for from it flow the issues of life.

Everything that matters, that’s important to us impacts our, heart.  If the, heart, is injured, broken or unhealthy because the, heart, plumps the pumps the blood. The, heart, pumps the influence of that thing to your spirit and to your soul and to your body.

So, when we talk about the, transformation, then it’s holistic and God is always at work in our lives trying to move us to a place of wholeness in all three of these areas as it pertains to renewal and, transformation.

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Conclusion

As we wrap up how can listeners connect with Mt Hermon Ministries Fort Myers? Tell us about your books and how we can connect on social media.

You can connect with our ministry, we are currently streaming on YouTube and Facebook at MT Hermon Ministries. You can join us Sundays at 11 a.m. you can go to our website.

https://www.mthermonministries.org/ to get some information on our ministry.

I am the author of three books:

https://www.amazon.com/JUSTICE-Nations-William-L-Glover/dp/0982910592

  • The justice book which is about your community of faith finding relative relevance as a change agent in your community
  • 30 Days of Excellence which is a 30-day devotion that cultivates habits of excellence in your life and
  • Ready for the Harvest which teaches us how to apply the principle of seed time and harvest in our lives and all these can be found on Amazon.

You can contact me personally at dr.wmglover0613@gmail.com

My Spiritual Father Helped in the Renewing of My Mind

I enjoyed the conversation, so thank you like we’ve known each other for 14 years let me also state how proud I am of you forging the way.  I remember when you began this journey and witnessing your evolution and growth.  Witnessing how God is enlarging your territory, makes me very proud.  I want to encourage you to continue that journey.

Myrna –  Thank you Pastor and I’ll share something publicly with you that when I wrote my book and you said that you’re proud of me, it brought tears to my eyes because it was the first

Time someone told me that. My father had never said he was proud of me.

As my spiritual father thank you so much for saying that I appreciate it. God sent me to you specifically I didn’t share our story of how I came to be under your guidance, but our connection has a purpose.

Thank you for tuning in to the Transform your Mind to Transform your Life radio podcast and television show.  If you are um listening on iTunes I would love for you to subscribe, rate and review.  I also want to invite you to join my Facebook group called Lifecoach.

Until next time sending you all Blessings

 

Additional Resources

Transform Your Mind Vblog on YouTube 

How to Develop an Adaptable Mindset

When you have an, adaptable mindset, it means you’re going to be, adaptable, to almost anything in life. So, what’s the definition of an, adaptable mindset, and how can we develop it?

Download the podcast here

https://pdcn.co/e/https://chrt.fm/track/897G7/www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/11217377-how-to-develop-an-adaptable-mindset.mp3?download=true

Bio

Robert Overweg is the founder of the, Adaptable Mindset program. He and his team empower people to develop their own, adaptable Mindset, to develop mental flexibility. Learn how to create, mental space, and to find new possibilities. In our rapidly changing world, we keep feeling the impact of unpredictable events to which we have to adapt.

Robert teaches how, adaptability, is about empowerment and finding new perspectives. The Adaptable Mindset program has been applied at several Fortune 500 companies including Chanel, and Heineken, multiple SMEs and innovative schools. They have also supported over a thousand students and solopreneurs with their online program.

Myrna: What do you credit your, adaptable mindset, to even as a kid?

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Developing an adaptable mindset as a child

Robert: My parents gave me a lot of freedom to explore. The told me, hey, if you want to be an artist or professor, do what makes you happy. I was always photographing crawling around and founded my own photography company when I was like 17 years old.  I was very naïve and I thought, hey, I can do this. I was just always failing forward again and again.  I noticed that a lot of people haven’t had that upbringing. But it’s not necessarily to have such an upbringing to be able to flow through life.

You can also find it later on, but it takes work and that’s why we found with the, Adaptable mindset program, and like all of our testimonials show that people can find their spark and find their drive can find these different perspectives again.  You can make the work fun and you can make the work playful so it’s it doesn’t feel like a work just creating, mental space.

Myrna: When I was growing up, everybody said that, you needed to be a lawyer or a doctor, to be considered successful and they were stuck in that.  If they didn’t go to medical school or they didn’t become a lawyer, they kind of felt that they were a failure of some sort, you know what I mean?

So, a, creative mindset, would definitely be an, adaptable mindset. Because in order to have, creativity, you’ve got to let energy flow through, you got to let source flow through. You got to be in touch with and feeling your environment. So that’s probably why you gravitated towards, adaptability, and started your design company at 17. You had that, creativity, almost kind of built in.

So, like I started off by saying, we are, adaptable. As human beings we were born with the ability to be, adaptable. So why do we need that, adaptability?  Why do you think that God hardwired us to be, adaptable, people?

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We have to adapt to survive

Robert: God did it to everything. From nature to animals otherwise you aren’t able to survive. It’s just a very natural thing to do. Also, if we look at new theories, we also see that it’s not just survival of the fittest and adaptation. It’s also working together and that’s maybe something that we forgot a little bit as humankind. Most of us have heard about survival of the fittest, but not about doing as a collaborative effort. And yeah, I think like everyone also has the ability to have an, adaptable mindset, we make so many silly rules, which narrow our frame of view, which limit our own, creativity.

And then we put upon our children and we teach that limitation in schools as well because we make life simpler than it is. we compartmentalize things at school. So, we deny people who understand the entirety, you are not trained in intuition you’re not trained in in compassion. You’re not trained in imagination. It’s mainly different kinds of sports, more of the art skills and then you get grades. And then if you if you don’t pass your grades, then you’re a failure like entire system is set up to compartmentalize not really help you.

Adaptable mindset in business, is the same in organizations too much compartmentalization. You’re not really valued for your, creativity.  And then we have media which is constantly distracting your social media which is railroads are thinking we’re constantly being narrowed in a frame of view we’re being boxed in. And that’s not how we are meant to be meant to be.  You should be able to find your own path and do whatever the heck you want actually, as long as it contributes to the to the greater good.

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An Adaptable mindset is adaptable to change

Myrna: When I thing of an, adaptable mindset, I’m thinking along the lines of, adaptable to change. Alright, so let’s take the pandemic. We had to do a lot of changes and we had to, adapt. In fact, they’re saying that we will never go back to where we were before. So, let’s say that, we’re accustomed to the grind of getting up in the morning at six o’clock and taking the train or driving in rush hour traffic to get to work and then all of a sudden, you are stuck at home by yourself.

You don’t have people to talk to, you don’t you don’t have that communication with people. A lot of people got really depressed, because they didn’t have that outlet. So, talk about that kind of, adaptability. Why do we need, adaptability, for things like crisis?

Robert: A lot of people, of course, everyone went through this experience, and some fared better than others. Right? A lot of people indeed became depressed and weren’t really connected anymore to what inspired them. The people who did flourish, often took care of themselves, or went out for walks, did their own exercising, took care of proper nutrition, maybe even getting in touch with the restoration.

So, everyone has to decide. It doesn’t matter if he fails, then you pick up the next one and just keep on expanding the mind even putting new information in and just keep on repeating that. Also being conscious of how the world reacts to it and what the world needs. So okay, now I need to work from home. But what can I do? You can do that by finding different perspectives and assessing how you can get out of the situation or how you can get the most out of it while remaining calm.

The world is very demanding, you need to find that countermeasures to be able to get clarity again and to connect again to what you want to do instead of the outside world.

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Most people don’t like change

Myrna: As you were talking, I remembered that a lot of times me personally and some people that don’t like change, right? And anytime that you have opportunity to change, you kind of want to stay the same because you’re comfortable there. But I found that anytime I resist change, and then I leap forward into it, It works out a whole lot better than what I was didn’t want to change from. Who would have thought that people would like to work from home. But now they’re finding reasons that it’s a whole lot better.

You kind of, adapt, to whatever situation you’re in and that’s probably why God programmed us with, adaptability, because things change. Even our wealth and our health, sometimes you can go from, being very wealthy and then you’re poor, and you got to, adapt. People don’t really, adapt, but they at least try. Or you go from being healthy one day to being bed ridden the next day.

You got to find a way to make that work for you. You know what I mean? So, when I think of, adaptability, that’s what I’m thinking of, any situation that has changed, and you got to fix it. One day you are married and you’ve got the second income and all of a sudden, you’re divorced and you now you are a single mom struggling to pay your bills. We all have to develop an, adaptability mindset.

Who moved my cheese

We always resist change. I remember way back when I was in the corporate world, they, you know, one of my companies made us read this book, Who Moved My Cheese, and they made all employees read that book as part of the onboarding training because they know that people hate change, and everybody’s gonna resist change. Corporations hire coaches to help people, adaptability mindset.

What are some of the pros the pros, of an, adaptable mindset?

Robert: If you have an, adaptable mindset, there’s room for growth? You ask yourself, what can I learn from it? If there’s nothing that you can learn from it, just move on.

Myrna: Yeah, there’s always something you can learn even if it’s not what not to do.  So, if we find that our personalities are the type of person that we don’t like change, we’re stuck in the same mode. You know, that our parents told us to do, you know what I mean? We’re not growing, we’re not curious. We’re just stuck. How can someone in that space, develop adaptability? Is there like some steps that they can do?

Robert: Yeah, I think it’s very beneficial to start with what you’re curious about. Because what you’re curious about is about, adaptability.

Myrna: A lot of people that are not curious, let’s assume they’re not curious. They’re just gonna do what they know.

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Curiosity leads to adaptability

Robert: Well, there’s always something that you can be curious about. It can even be a TV program or channel on discovery or whatever.  You do need to have a sense of, curiosity, still in you, otherwise, there needs to be a willingness from the individual. You know, that it starts there. It starts with you taking that step forward, and putting more of the stuff in your life, which inspires you.

And if you find something even if it slightly makes you curious, then keep on exploring and keep on pulling on that thread and through more of that into your life.  It could also be that you just feel that your mind is totally overflowing and you don’t have any space, you don’t have any time to be curious.

Myrna: With an, adaptable mindset, you can change because the mindset is your software, right? So, when you have an, adaptable mindset, that means you’re going to be, adaptable, to almost anything in life. So, let’s discuss what is an, adaptable mindset, your definition. How can we develop that mindset?

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Transform your Mind Stitcher

The adaptable mindset is about openness

Robert: That’s what, mindset, is that you’re always able to find a fresh perspective that you have openness, openness to new ideas is a very large aspect of that. Because openness allows you to see more things. It’s also about expanding our frame of mind. You know, everyone has their own specific frame of mind through which they look through the world.

And sometimes we forget that everyone has their own specific frame of mind, that the frame is like a letterbox issue to the world. It narrows your frame of view whether you notice it or not. So, it’s always a good idea to start chipping away at that frame to try and expand it and expose yourself to art, to movies, to music that it lights up your soul and do that often and maybe less of the Instagram scrolling. Did you know that Kim Kardashian has a new boyfriend? Not really expanding her frame of mind?

Myrna: Yes, a lot of time and other people’s business take up space in our mind. Everyone is now watching Johnny Depp.

Robert: We need to create more brain space to also filter more content, but also work on creating more cognitive flexibility through movement through sports like yoga, meditation, cycling, strength training, all of these things are scientifically proven to create more cognitive flexibility. It makes you better able to deal with uncertainty and ambiguity like strength training, strong mind and body because a strong body equals a strong mind.

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Creating mental space

It’s so extremely logical, but we are we’ve become such sedentary creatures and we’re always sitting in a chair on our phone. And of course, you’ll be more flexible because you’ve got such so much data of solutions and possibilities and your, subconscious mind, is able to make new connections. The other important thing is it’s what you see with people who have great scientific discoveries Nobel Prize winners. All of these people, they also have, mental space.

And they had ways to sort of resynthesize what they experienced by playing violin, doing juggling unicycling going for long walks, going sailing, and doing that for hours. When do we still take time ever do nothing? Absolutely nothing. Or just react to something like violin or go for a walk. It’s often that we have a second device for doing something else or thinking about something to think different and to speak different as well.

So, what we see is that most people change when they encounter change. They say, Ah, it’s not possible. Oh, that will never happen here. And you know, all like these walls that they put up. And it’s debatable if that is very helpful. But what might be more beneficial is to always think positive and how it could be possible.  And just always having that open view.

The Adaptable Mindset program

Myrna: Your, adaptable mindset program, you said that you have helped over 1000 students and a lot of entrepreneurs you know solo entrepreneurs. Tell us about your program.

Robert: So, we have an online program, which is curiosity based, it’s very playful. You can choose your own boss through the program and you can start with our nature game’s philosophy, doesn’t really matter. And just take all your inspiration and expand your mind. There is a masterclass in there as well on how to create, mental space. There is a segment on how to deal with a, fear of failure, like all things that you use during your development, and you can just choose what you need and what resonates with you.

You don’t have to do everything or actually anything at all. I don’t really mind like as long as it actually works for you. So, we’ve got the online program, and then we do workshops, and organizational transformation in these larger organizations as well. And then normally, the first week with Chief Technology Officer head of innovation, head of digital, someone in a leadership position, and then we talk about the ENA company. How other teams are structured, what people are lacking, how to stop being stressed out, these kinds of things and then make a custom program to support people in resolving these challenges. So, you get more creativity, more imagination, more mental space, because that is what most organizations need.

Myrna: That’s awesome. What’s your website?

Robert: www.adaptablemindset.com