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myrna

Personal Development

Are You an Open or Closed Communicator?

Are you an open or closed Communicator

This week on Mindset Transformation radio and podcast with Coach Myrna Young, I interview Leadership Coach and Trainer, Gail Green.
Gail teaches us How to Become an Open Communicator. Gail is the founder of GoGreen Learning.
To receive her Free Gift of 3 Go Cards send her an email from her web site www.gogreenlearning.com

Here is a brief Biography of my guest Gail Green.
• Gail is a leadership coach and trainer and her topic today is “How to find out if you are an open or closed communicator” in your business environment. Gail is a leader who connects individuals and teams to their truth, helping them to discover their full expression of courage, joy and fulfillment. Gail works with all sizes of companies, as well as individually with leaders, and do life coaching with individuals from all walks of life.
• Gail’s primary work is in leadership development, team-building, stress management and all forms of communication skills.

Why is being a closed communicator bad? Because as a closed off person, you become defensive, resistant, bitchy, moody, easy to anger, confrontational, and not open to feedback.
So as a Leader, it is important to be open to your team and employees.
Open people radiate outwards from their heart and is able to touch others.
If you want to impact your employees and your customers, then learn how to be open.
Listen to the podcast as Gail teaches us how to be Open vs Closed with the help of her Go Cards.

Brian Tracy The author of “Eat that Frog” also teaches How to become an Open Leader and achieve new levels of success in sales.

Why is being a closed communicator bad? Because as a closed off person, you become defensive, resistant, bitchy, moody, easy to anger, confrontational, and not open to feedback.
So as a Leader, it is important to be open to your team and employees.
Open people radiate outwards from their heart and is able to touch others.
If you want to impact your employees and your customers, then learn how to be open.
Listen to the podcast as Gail teaches us how to be Open vs Closed with the help of her Go Cards.

Are You also Closed Off in your personal relationships And Don’t Even Know It?

How Would you answer the following questions?
Are you emotionally guarded?
Are you willing to take risks?

If you answered yes to these questions, it could mean that you are closed off emotionally.

Sometimes being emotionally guarded gets you into bad situations; but most of the time it gets you nowhere. In every area of life, there is no reward if there is no risk taken. So that could be why you keep finding yourself in relationships that bore you, or in relationship with other emotionally closed off individuals. Because like attracts like. Those relationships aren’t very rewarding, are they? If you don’t take the risk

by putting your true self and your true feelings on the table, those are the types of relationships that you will attract. Your emotionally open friends will get those giddy, best-friends-lovers, movie-type romances; you will get the dead-end ones. Maybe you’ve never had your heart broken, and maybe you think that’s a perk. But it’s not. It is said that it is better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all! So, I will ask the question. Are you closed off and don’t even realize it?

Here is an article from Madame Enoire that asks 10 more ways to tell if you are closed off personally.

Here are 10 ways to tell if you closed off personally: 
1. Do you feel like first dates are interrogations, and are put off by the line of questioning you receive during them?
2. Does it feel very inappropriate to you whenever someone becomes emotional around you?
3. Do your friends share their romantic stories with you? Or do they feel that you are never happy for them so they don’t share?
4. Do you attract cocky guys?
5. You do a lot of Googling before first dates.
6. You prep your friends to meet a guy.
7. Sex is a competition.
8. You’ve never cried to a partner or shown your venerability.
9. Eye contact makes you very uncomfortable
10. You’re very sarcastic

Show Notes:

Topic: Are you an Open or Closed Communicator?
1. Question 1: Tell us your journey towards becoming a Leadership coach
2. Question 2: How did you come to specialize in Open vs closed communication?
3. Question 3: How does a leader know if he or she is open or closed? What determines that?
4. Question 4: If a leader becomes closed off, how can he or she trace the source?
5. Question 5: Why should leaders want to become open? What are the benefits of being open?
6. Question 6: What tools do you offer as a coach to help clients who are closed off to become open?
7 Question 7: You sent me this beautiful set of Go Cards, how does one use these cards to change their state?

 

 

Coach Myrna Young, Life Coaching Blog and podcast

Fear: How to overcome and Find Joy

Fear: How to overcome and Find Joy

Fear is an energy. Thoughts are the most powerful energy force in the universe.

Thoughts can be either positive or negative.

Heading up the rear of negative thoughts, is fear.

It is the bottom feeder or all the emotions.

If you allow fear to linger in your body and in your mind, It will not only attract the thing you fear the most into your experience; but it will also bring disease to your body.

All diseases can be traced back to negative thoughts and fear.

Negative thoughts transform your body into an acidic state.

Fear is a negative thought magnified to the 1000th degree.

In fear mode, your body is activated in the fight or flight mode,

Your body tenses, your breathing is shallow, your heart palpitates, your blood pressure is elevated, your hands and body sweat.

Not a good place to dwell.

Unfortunately, your brain cannot detect the difference between your imagination and reality, so the person in the grip of fear cannot tell the difference. They cannot tell that it is false evidence appearing real.

 

Today I want to teach you how to use positive energy to clear the negative energies of fear. But first I want to review one of the Spiritual Laws of the Universe. The Law of Sowing and Reaping.

We all know of the physical laws like Gravity.

Some laws are physical and some are Spiritual and quantum.

Understanding the spiritual Law of Sowing and reaping can change your world.

Understanding that whatever you create it in the spiritual world of your thoughts will manifest in the physical world.

Put another way, that means whatever you plant in the fertile soil of your mind you will manifest in your physical world.

Just like planting an apple tree

Except that in the spiritual world

The soil is your mind

The seeds are your thoughts

The water are your actions

And The sun is your feelings

If you allow fear to dwell in your heart and mind every day you will manifest an apple orchard in your reality.

Energy flows where attention goes 

Whatever you focus on expands 

Everything is energy and all energy attracts similar energies.

You can’t put out negative energy and expect positive results.

You can’t plant apple trees and expect oranges.

Likewise, you can’t focus on what you fear and produce a successful result.

If you are constantly thinking of the things you fear, you are planting a seed and based in the universal law of reaping and sowing, it must germinate.

The mind or consciousness is connected to reality.

Think of something strong enough or long enough to and it will eventually manifest in your reality.

These are six words you must stamp on your mind

“You become what you think about”

When you realize that your mind is a garden you will begin to plant only the things you desire.

Exercise:  write down something that is opposite of what you fear and start giving it the same attention you have been giving your fear. Since light conquers darkness, it will eventually have your fear for lunch!

 

Imagine you having fun traveling the world in crystal clear clarity.

Say daily affirmations that compliments your desire.

Visual your goal so much than sometimes you are not sure what is imagined and what is reality; the same way that you let fear take you out of reality.

Don’t get disappointed if it takes time to perfect this. Remember that positive things take time to manifest.

 

Weeds will sprout up; negative thoughts of failure will sprout up.

So, every morning find the weeds and dig them up.

Remember a successful gardener will always cultivate his land.

Cultivate your mind for success.

Life is energy, whatever you put out, is returned to you.

The mind does not care what seeds you plant, it will always return what you plant.

You can plant wealth or you can plant poverty.

You can plant fear or you can plant happiness.

Link: wakeupcloud.com/overcoming-fear

Link: http://srisriravishankar.org/

Here is an excerpt from the book: The Wise Heart: A Guide to the Universal Teachings of Buddhist Psychology:

The Buddha faced plenty of his own fear and terror of imminent death. This is a passage from the Buddha’s early writings that Jack Kornfield, a teacher who helped introduce Buddhist mindfulness practice to the West, quotes in his book.

How would it be if in the dark of the month, with no moon, I were to enter the most strange and frightening places, near tombs and in the thick of the forest, that I might come to understand fear and terror. And doing so, a wild animal would approach or the wind rustle the leaves and I would think, “Perhaps the fear and terror now comes.” And being resolved to dispel the hold of that fear and terror, I remained in whatever posture it arose, sitting or standing, walking or lying down. I did not change until I had faced that fear and terror in that very posture, until I was free of its hold upon me … And having this thought, I did so. By facing the fear and terror I became free.

Read the full article here:

http://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2016/11/18/13579842/ancient-buddhist-strategy-overcoming-paralyzing-fear

The energy of fear

The energy of fear

Fear – False objects appearing real, as per the about passage, can be released by standing your ground. Our instinctive reaction to fear is to turn and run because as humans we are hard wired to run from pain and towards pleasure.

But, as the Buddha teaches in the passage above if you stand and have the courage to not move, you become free of fear and realize that your imagination is always worse than the reality.

Let me share a personal story on how I overcame fear.

When I first came to the United States of America, I came as a business owner. I did not have any of the benefits of a permanent resident. As my business was building, I decided to earn money as a sales person selling vacations. I was not authorized to work in the US, so I became very fearful of being found out and being deported. Every night I would dream that the immigration officials would come to my house and take me away in handcuffs. Sometimes I would dream that they would throw me in the back of the trunk.

One day, my pastor preached a sermon on fear. He said that God promises to carry your burdens, so give them to God. He said when you give your fears and heavy loads to God, you can’t worry or take them back because that would mean that you don’t have faith in God’s promise to carry them. He asked the congregation to write our fears and heavy burdens on a piece of paper and ceremoniously throw them at the alter giving them to God. I wrote my fear of being deported on a piece of paper and threw in on the alter. In doing so, I became free because I gave it away to someone else, God. The good news is that I no longer was afraid of anything. Every time something came up that would potentially me fearful, I would face it and know that it will work out for my good. I stood on the scripture “I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you.”

 

http://www.wisdom.srisriravishankar.org/overcome-fear-failure-sometimes-prevents-taking-initiative/

Wisdom by http://www.wisdom.srisriravishankar.org/

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

Now in order to transform the energy of fear into the energy of joy, I want to share with you a short meditation practice.

Sit quietly in a chair; be comfortable. Place feet flat on the floor, hands clasped in your lap. Close your eyes. Be present. Focus on your breathing, feel your belly rise and fall under your clasped hands.

Breathe in for a count of 4 and breathe out for account of 6. Thus, slowing down your rhythmic cycles. Be mindful of the air as it passes through your nostrils down your esophagus and into your abdomen. If your mind wanders off bring it back gently to your breathe. Your mind can only concentrate on one thing at a time. Concentrating on your breathe bypasses your mind. Once you slow your cycles and quiet your mind, you are now in the receptive mode to change your programming.

Think briefly about something you fear. Today we will use as our example the fear of flying. Today we are going to use our imagination to replicate the experience of flying while you are sitting comfortably and safely in your chair.

Let’s begin. visualize you are at the airport with your loved ones, your husband and 2 children. You are on your way to Venice, Italy. You chose Venice because you wanted a romantic vacation with your husband. You can’t wait to ride on the gondolas and be serenaded with live music, going to the opera and have the experience of taking a water taxi everywhere. You are excited. This energy is positive. You let this feeling of euphoria wash over you, you feel your body tingle with this positive energy. You feel good! Now you are boarding the plane, you are starting to feel a little anxious. You board the plane and find your seat, you buckle yourself in.  The pilot announces  that your flight time is 6 hours and that he will be flying at a cruising altitude of 35,000 feet. He advises you to give your attention the flight attendant and pay attention to the safety information. You notice your exits. You listen to what to do in the event of a water landing. Your mind is going nuts with fear, your heart starts to palpitate rapidly, you start to sweat. Now the airplane is taxing down the runway at full speed then it lifts off the ground. You squeeze your husband hand, you are hardly breathing, your whole body is tight. The plane is climbing it shakes a little you are so scared the sweat starts dripping from your forehead. The plane reaches cruising altitude, the pilot turns off the fasten seat belt sign and people start moving about the plane. You calm down a little, but still aware of every movement of the plane. The flight attendants come around and offer beverages. You ask for a glass of wine. You are feeling calmer. The flight is uneventful. After what seems like an eternity the pilot announces that in 30 minutes he will be starting his descent into Venice. Your fear returns, the plane shakes a little as it descends and you are once again in the grip of fear. The plane touches down and speeds down the runway braking speed. Your body is tight, your breathing shallow. Then it is all over. You faced your fear and came out on the other side! You exit the plane and you are in Venice.

I want you now to realize that you have taken your first flight in your mind. I want you to realize that fear is false evidence appearing real. I want you to realize that once you face your fear, like a bully, it backs down, I want you to realize that the energy of fear is keeping you stuck, I want you to realize that whatever your fear, just like we took a ride on an airplane and came out alive on the other side that is how all fear works. It has no real power over you. The only thing that is holding you back from doing the things you want to do is all in your mind. So, the only way the clear it is to start with the mind. Do a dress rehearsal in the mind and then do it in the physical.

The first step is to overcome fear is to face the fear.

The second step is to clear it from the place it is planted in your mind. Take a moment now to ask your higher self where the fear of flying came from. When was the fear planted? When you get the answer, you may think to yourself boy that was silly or you may have a legitimate reason to be afraid of flying. Someone you know could have died in a plane crash or you yourself could have been in a plane emergency landing. The thing to remember is that you know that every time you drive on the highway you could die and you are aware of thousands of people who have died in car accidents; yet few people have a fear of driving in a car. So, consciousness is the second step.

The third step is to clear that energy by replacing it with positive energy. We are going to use the positive energy of gratitude.  Sit comfortably again. Imagine a bright light entering the crown of your head moving down through your check, down your throat, to your chest, down your abdomen through your feet. Feel this light fill all your energy centers as you become fully relaxed.  Now expand this energy out from your chest past the room, past your city, past your country, past the clouds, past the sun, past the planet into the stratosphere. You are now floating in cyberspace if you can bring your fear to mind in this space, do so now. Then replace that feeling of fear with the feeling of gratitude. Gratitude that you are alive, gratitude that you are in sound mind, that you have a place to sleep and food to eat. Gratitude that you are wealthier than 95% of the people in the world and you have the resources to travel to exotic destinations. Gratitude that you will not let fear rob you of joy. Now set the intention to fly to the first place on your bucket list within the year.

I would love to hear your comments on what your fears are, and if you achieved a success result of transferring it with these exercises. Please share this podcast with friends and family and remember to subscribe and post a review.  Transform your Mind podcast is giving away a Free Checklist you can do every morning to replace your fears with positive affirmations.

Transform your mind iTunes podcast

To receive please subscribe, rate and review this podcast then send me an email to info@myhelps.us with the subject line iTunes review.

Until next time Namaste