The Circle of Life: Embracing Motherhood

January 20, 2023 Myrna Morris Young Leave a comment

Keshia Morris Desir, my daughter and mom to be interviews me on motherhood. In my book Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement I talk about motherhood and how being a mom is my purpose.

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Bio

Keshia Morris Desir has a blossoming career in DC. She is an activist working in DC to disrupt the over criminalization of communities of color by investigating and exposing the underlying causes of mass incarceration through a democracy lens. Getting incarceration money out of politics, and advocating for guaranteed voting rights for everyone, including people serving time in prison. But today she is speaking as my daughter about becoming a mother. She is entering into the second trimester of her first pregnancy.

Keshia: I am super excited to be here with my mother today to interview her on her book, Out of the Snares: A story of hope and encouragement and her chapter on, motherhood.

The very first question I have for you, mom is in your book, you share a bit about the, circle of life, and how your parents were not married when you were born. So, for folks that haven’t yet read the book, can you share a little bit about that experience?

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My circle of life started with poverty and child abuse

Myrna: Yes, I would love to. Out of the Snares, is basically my story. It’s the story of me getting out of the snares of, child sexual abuse, poverty, being born in a third world country. And, of course, being born to parents, or who were not married. My mom and my dad hooked up and had sex and I showed up. They weren’t even really in a committed relationship. It’s one of those things that happened. When I read Oprah’s story I found out that her parents also hooked up just one time and created her. We were both born for a purpose.

So, I pull that in to my experience, that I was born with a purpose. On that rainy day, all those years ago in Guyana, my mom was alone when I was born because my father was not around. And I feel that coming from that kind of nurturing environment, where my mother was my central figure or my central person. For a long time, it was my mom, it was my grandmother, it was my aunt. These are the people that kind of raised me and as I got a little older, my father came back into my life.

But yes, I learned everything that I know about, motherhood, from my mom and my grandmother and my mom is an amazing mother. She has four children, and she basically single handedly raised them all on her own because the men were not around. She was that unfortunate, the men kept leaving. Your dad and I broke up when you were five years old. So, I have been the most influential person in your life and I took that very seriously. So, that’s basically my introduction to, motherhood.

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The connection between Single mothers and delinquent children

Keshia: As you were speaking, I’m thinking about my work. And I’m thinking about what usually breeds or is usually the crux of, black families, being involved in the, criminal justice system. Thankfully, none of your brothers and sisters have been involved in the, criminal justice system, and I just want to know, what do you what do you attribute that to? Because often we do hear of, black families, that come from, quote, unquote, broken homes where fathers aren’t in the picture. They get involved in crime, they go down the wrong path, they get involved in the, criminal justice system, somehow. So, what do you attribute your family success to?

Myrna: Excellent question. And I’ve thought about this a while now, not in Guyana, because we left Guyana as children. So, we weren’t old enough to get into the, criminal justice system, in Guyana. But when we were living in Toronto, Canada, we actually lived in the projects. And I have always wondered why my siblings didn’t get involved with the bad crowd. I’ve always wondered about that and the only thing that I can come up with was that my mother loved us and we didn’t want to disappoint her. I was speaking to her a couple of weeks back. And it was really interesting what she said. She said to me, you know, I had yawl, and I took any job because I had yawl to feed!

Keshia: Thank you for sharing that mom, it was really helpful to hear that feedback. It was just something that I was thinking about. I’m just gonna turn it back over to you. I think you have something a poem that you’d like to share.

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Motherhood my baby girl is born

Myrna: Yes. Right. So, in my chapter on, motherhood, I start off my book talking about the, circle of life, continues where I was born, and then I dived right into, motherhood, because it was something that was very important to me and made me feel so special. I have two biological children. I was 21 years old when my son was born, and then you my daughter was born on my 30th birthday. So, because she was born on my 30th birthday, she was a girl and a lot of women always want little baby girls. You know, I was tickled pink, in fact, it becomes more special than that. She was conceived for my honeymoon.

So, I came back from my honeymoon, and a couple of weeks later found out that I was pregnant. The immediate response of me learning that I was pregnant was joy. I mean, I didn’t know the sex until she came out. But we had a connection from the very beginning. So, in my book, I actually wrote a poem that I want to read to you guys. It says,

Poem my baby girl is here

My greatest blessing showed up on my 30 birthday,

A bundle of joy for born to this world

Six pounds, seven ounces of joy, my birthday gift. Oh, what a toy.

I little girl with curly brown hair, smooth black skin, with the face of an angel.

I shed a tear it was a love affair at first sight.

She reached through my heart and grabbed my soul forever more.

God had given me the desires of my heart, a daughter to adore.

Bird sang, trees swayed, the sun shone brightly, and the heavens opened up and poured out rain.

My baby girl was here. Keshia, her father whispered welcome to my world.

And her mother answered, Glory be to God, let her light shine brightly.

Let her be a delight.

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Myrna: See, I spoke it into existence, you have been a delight. You have been the gift that keeps on giving. A lot of mothers and daughters have special relationships, but we have a relationship that everybody talks about, and it’s absolutely amazing.

Keshia: Wow. It’s been a while since I’ve heard that poem. I have a jacket on but if you could see my arms, I probably have goosebumps. I just hope to repeat that, I am heading as you said, into my second trimester. And I have a similar due date as our birthday so yeah, we should be hoping for three peat.

Myrna: Yes, yes. From our mouths to God’s ears.

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Motherhood: How to protect your kids from sexual abuse

Keshia: Okay. All right. Well, I’m gonna take this conversation a little bit differently. And I’m going to ask you a question, because at the start of this conversation, you started by saying that Out of the Snares is about you coming out of poverty, sexual abuse, and parents not being in the home. And so, we talked a little bit about the, poverty, we talked a little bit about parents not being in the home. But I’m wanting to hear a bit more about your memories of your, child abuse. And in your book, you also talk about how the memories of that, child abuse, came back to you after I was born. Can you talk a little bit about that? About that time for you as you had me and those memories of, sexual abuse, came flooding back to you.

And then also maybe you want to give some advice to listeners that have experienced, sexual abuse, and have had daughters and now have to feel like they have to protect their child at all costs.

Myrna: Well, thank you Keshia, it’s a very important conversation to have. So let me start with me and then I will expand it out. I was, sexually abused, by my godfather. I called him grandfather and I spent a lot of time at his house. So, that is the first problem that contributes to our black and brown babies getting, sexually abused, because apparently in our community it happens a lot. In my experience, it wasn’t a babysitting thing. It was just that, I was always at someone’s house. I was at my aunt’s house, I was at my grandfather’s house and when you’re sleeping over at people’s houses and there is men around, this is basically what happens.

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Mothers also need to protect boys

I read something from Tyler Perry, that was addressing this issue, and he was talking about our community. Most Black mothers don’t have money for a babysitter, so they always have the kids go and stay at the uncle dem house and this person’s house and all that kind of stuff. And this is basically what happens. Kids are being, sexually abused, by people that come to our homes and even boyfriends. So, getting back to my, child abuse, I didn’t have any trauma attached to it as it was happening because this person was a loved one and I really loved him.

He showered me with gifts, we were poor, and he was rich. So when this experience was going on, I wasn’t traumatized in any way. I mean, I didn’t understand what was going on because it started when I was very young age. I didn’t understand what was going on until I started having boyfriends at 13 and realized, you’ve already had sex. These guys are gonna think that you’re a tramp.

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Past sexual abuse trauma resurfaced after birth of child

That started my whole self-respect phase which worked for me because I was never promiscuous. So, it wasn’t very traumatic. When I recognized that it was wrong, I stopped it. There was no big problem. You know what I mean? But then, when you were born, something that I buried came alive and it was very, traumatic. I stopped wanting to have your dad to touch me, I had bad dreams. And whatever it was, clearly it was coming back up. I mean, and it was really an unusual response. Of course, I never went to therapy or anything. I just worked through it, but it started my vigilance of making sure you were not exposed to, sexual abuse.

And my vigilance came with people in my home and where I sent you to sleep over. Your father and I split up when you were five years old. I made sure that anybody that I’m bringing to the house that I would, make sure I don’t leave you alone with that person. At one point in time, my sister was living with me, and her husband started bathing you. And I immediately put a stop to that.

So these are the ways that you protect your girl children and boy children, because it’s not only girls now. But you protect them by knowing who they’re coming into contact with. Our world is becoming really messed up because women are now molesting boys. Tyler Perry, tells a story of how he was molested by a woman and I think even Terry Crews revealed that he was also, sexually assaulted.

Motherhood: Be careful your kids are always watching

In my book, I share my views on, motherhood, and I believe that, motherhood, you are a role model for your kids. I remember you were always watching me. It was an incredible thing, you didn’t feel comfortable unless you’re in my presence watching and listening, watching and listening. And mothers or fathers, your kids are always listening. They’re always watching. So, you can’t say “Do as I say it, not as I do.” You’ve got to do it. You’ve got to walk the walk. So, I was a role model to you and I taught you things that my mom taught me. For example, to make decisions for yourself.

What do you feel is the role of a mother and how do you plan to embrace, motherhood?

Keshia: Yeah, I mean we’ve talked a lot about protection, I definitely think that the role of the mom is to protect their cub so to speak. When we watch Animal Planet you always see the mother lion protecting her cub and protecting them from harm.

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The role of a mother

So definitely protection is the, role of a mother, as well as all the other things like:

Feed your children not only actual physically feeding, but emotionally feeding, feeding their self-confidence,
Teaching them to become contributing members of society
Helping them to find their purpose
Teaching them to love God
And how to survive in life
To lead by example, kids are always watching. You want to be able to not only say the important things, but show them the important things as well.

So how am I embracing motherhood? I’m still learning, I am just a few months in but yeah, I have been reading books and I am working towards embracing, motherhood.

It still feels weird. You know, hearing my baby’s heartbeat seeing it via ultrasounds. I mean, it just feels different. I can’t even really grasp the words to say like, how does it feel to know that something is living inside of you and living inside of your belly? Right. Something that you have to care for and nurture and protect and be worried for and scared for and love all at the same time. So, it’s very humbling. Maybe that’s the word.

Circle of life continues connection with baby

Myrna: I didn’t hear the word, connection. Are you connecting to this baby?

Keshia: Thanks for putting me on the spot mom. I don’t know if I would say I am connecting with the baby yet. I don’t feel connected yet. I did have the feeling that morning that it was a girl even though all along I’ve been saying they think it’s a boy. But that morning I did say yeah, you’re a girl. So maybe. Also, the day before I found out that I was pregnant. I said we need a new car and went out and bought a new car that day. Because I’m like we you know, we need a new car for family planning. So, I guess she is speaking to me.

Myrna: She’s sending you those signals. Yes, yes. Amazing. All right. Well, listen, Keshia Morris Desir. You did not disappoint. We had an incredible conversation. Thank you for sharing your, motherhood experience, with me and my audience. Wishing you the best pregnancy and delivery.

Alternate Health

How to Develop an Adaptable Mindset

September 7, 2022 Myrna Morris Young

When you have an, adaptable mindset, it means you’re going to be, adaptable, to almost anything in life. So, what’s the definition of an, adaptable mindset, and how can we develop it?

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Bio

Robert Overweg is the founder of the, Adaptable Mindset program. He and his team empower people to develop their own, adaptable Mindset, to develop mental flexibility. Learn how to create, mental space, and to find new possibilities. In our rapidly changing world, we keep feeling the impact of unpredictable events to which we have to adapt.

Robert teaches how, adaptability, is about empowerment and finding new perspectives. The Adaptable Mindset program has been applied at several Fortune 500 companies including Chanel, and Heineken, multiple SMEs and innovative schools. They have also supported over a thousand students and solopreneurs with their online program.

Myrna: What do you credit your, adaptable mindset, to even as a kid?

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Developing an adaptable mindset as a child

Robert: My parents gave me a lot of freedom to explore. The told me, hey, if you want to be an artist or professor, do what makes you happy. I was always photographing crawling around and founded my own photography company when I was like 17 years old. I was very naïve and I thought, hey, I can do this. I was just always failing forward again and again. I noticed that a lot of people haven’t had that upbringing. But it’s not necessarily to have such an upbringing to be able to flow through life.

You can also find it later on, but it takes work and that’s why we found with the, Adaptable mindset program, and like all of our testimonials show that people can find their spark and find their drive can find these different perspectives again. You can make the work fun and you can make the work playful so it’s it doesn’t feel like a work just creating, mental space.

Myrna: When I was growing up, everybody said that, you needed to be a lawyer or a doctor, to be considered successful and they were stuck in that. If they didn’t go to medical school or they didn’t become a lawyer, they kind of felt that they were a failure of some sort, you know what I mean?

So, a, creative mindset, would definitely be an, adaptable mindset. Because in order to have, creativity, you’ve got to let energy flow through, you got to let source flow through. You got to be in touch with and feeling your environment. So that’s probably why you gravitated towards, adaptability, and started your design company at 17. You had that, creativity, almost kind of built in.

So, like I started off by saying, we are, adaptable. As human beings we were born with the ability to be, adaptable. So why do we need that, adaptability? Why do you think that God hardwired us to be, adaptable, people?

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We have to adapt to survive

Robert: God did it to everything. From nature to animals otherwise you aren’t able to survive. It’s just a very natural thing to do. Also, if we look at new theories, we also see that it’s not just survival of the fittest and adaptation. It’s also working together and that’s maybe something that we forgot a little bit as humankind. Most of us have heard about survival of the fittest, but not about doing as a collaborative effort. And yeah, I think like everyone also has the ability to have an, adaptable mindset, we make so many silly rules, which narrow our frame of view, which limit our own, creativity.

And then we put upon our children and we teach that limitation in schools as well because we make life simpler than it is. we compartmentalize things at school. So, we deny people who understand the entirety, you are not trained in intuition you’re not trained in in compassion. You’re not trained in imagination. It’s mainly different kinds of sports, more of the art skills and then you get grades. And then if you if you don’t pass your grades, then you’re a failure like entire system is set up to compartmentalize not really help you.

Adaptable mindset in business, is the same in organizations too much compartmentalization. You’re not really valued for your, creativity. And then we have media which is constantly distracting your social media which is railroads are thinking we’re constantly being narrowed in a frame of view we’re being boxed in. And that’s not how we are meant to be meant to be. You should be able to find your own path and do whatever the heck you want actually, as long as it contributes to the to the greater good.

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An Adaptable mindset is adaptable to change

Myrna: When I thing of an, adaptable mindset, I’m thinking along the lines of, adaptable to change. Alright, so let’s take the pandemic. We had to do a lot of changes and we had to, adapt. In fact, they’re saying that we will never go back to where we were before. So, let’s say that, we’re accustomed to the grind of getting up in the morning at six o’clock and taking the train or driving in rush hour traffic to get to work and then all of a sudden, you are stuck at home by yourself.

You don’t have people to talk to, you don’t you don’t have that communication with people. A lot of people got really depressed, because they didn’t have that outlet. So, talk about that kind of, adaptability. Why do we need, adaptability, for things like crisis?

Robert: A lot of people, of course, everyone went through this experience, and some fared better than others. Right? A lot of people indeed became depressed and weren’t really connected anymore to what inspired them. The people who did flourish, often took care of themselves, or went out for walks, did their own exercising, took care of proper nutrition, maybe even getting in touch with the restoration.

So, everyone has to decide. It doesn’t matter if he fails, then you pick up the next one and just keep on expanding the mind even putting new information in and just keep on repeating that. Also being conscious of how the world reacts to it and what the world needs. So okay, now I need to work from home. But what can I do? You can do that by finding different perspectives and assessing how you can get out of the situation or how you can get the most out of it while remaining calm.

The world is very demanding, you need to find that countermeasures to be able to get clarity again and to connect again to what you want to do instead of the outside world.

Most people don’t like change

Myrna: As you were talking, I remembered that a lot of times me personally and some people that don’t like change, right? And anytime that you have opportunity to change, you kind of want to stay the same because you’re comfortable there. But I found that anytime I resist change, and then I leap forward into it, It works out a whole lot better than what I was didn’t want to change from. Who would have thought that people would like to work from home. But now they’re finding reasons that it’s a whole lot better.

You kind of, adapt, to whatever situation you’re in and that’s probably why God programmed us with, adaptability, because things change. Even our wealth and our health, sometimes you can go from, being very wealthy and then you’re poor, and you got to, adapt. People don’t really, adapt, but they at least try. Or you go from being healthy one day to being bed ridden the next day.

You got to find a way to make that work for you. You know what I mean? So, when I think of, adaptability, that’s what I’m thinking of, any situation that has changed, and you got to fix it. One day you are married and you’ve got the second income and all of a sudden, you’re divorced and you now you are a single mom struggling to pay your bills. We all have to develop an, adaptability mindset.

Who moved my cheese

We always resist change. I remember way back when I was in the corporate world, they, you know, one of my companies made us read this book, Who Moved My Cheese, and they made all employees read that book as part of the onboarding training because they know that people hate change, and everybody’s gonna resist change. Corporations hire coaches to help people, adaptability mindset.

What are some of the pros the pros, of an, adaptable mindset?

Robert: If you have an, adaptable mindset, there’s room for growth? You ask yourself, what can I learn from it? If there’s nothing that you can learn from it, just move on.

Myrna: Yeah, there’s always something you can learn even if it’s not what not to do. So, if we find that our personalities are the type of person that we don’t like change, we’re stuck in the same mode. You know, that our parents told us to do, you know what I mean? We’re not growing, we’re not curious. We’re just stuck. How can someone in that space, develop adaptability? Is there like some steps that they can do?

Robert: Yeah, I think it’s very beneficial to start with what you’re curious about. Because what you’re curious about is about, adaptability.

Myrna: A lot of people that are not curious, let’s assume they’re not curious. They’re just gonna do what they know.

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Curiosity leads to adaptability

Robert: Well, there’s always something that you can be curious about. It can even be a TV program or channel on discovery or whatever. You do need to have a sense of, curiosity, still in you, otherwise, there needs to be a willingness from the individual. You know, that it starts there. It starts with you taking that step forward, and putting more of the stuff in your life, which inspires you.

And if you find something even if it slightly makes you curious, then keep on exploring and keep on pulling on that thread and through more of that into your life. It could also be that you just feel that your mind is totally overflowing and you don’t have any space, you don’t have any time to be curious.

Myrna: With an, adaptable mindset, you can change because the mindset is your software, right? So, when you have an, adaptable mindset, that means you’re going to be, adaptable, to almost anything in life. So, let’s discuss what is an, adaptable mindset, your definition. How can we develop that mindset?

The adaptable mindset is about openness

Robert: That’s what, mindset, is that you’re always able to find a fresh perspective that you have openness, openness to new ideas is a very large aspect of that. Because openness allows you to see more things. It’s also about expanding our frame of mind. You know, everyone has their own specific frame of mind through which they look through the world.

And sometimes we forget that everyone has their own specific frame of mind, that the frame is like a letterbox issue to the world. It narrows your frame of view whether you notice it or not. So, it’s always a good idea to start chipping away at that frame to try and expand it and expose yourself to art, to movies, to music that it lights up your soul and do that often and maybe less of the Instagram scrolling. Did you know that Kim Kardashian has a new boyfriend? Not really expanding her frame of mind?

Myrna: Yes, a lot of time and other people’s business take up space in our mind. Everyone is now watching Johnny Depp.

Robert: We need to create more brain space to also filter more content, but also work on creating more cognitive flexibility through movement through sports like yoga, meditation, cycling, strength training, all of these things are scientifically proven to create more cognitive flexibility. It makes you better able to deal with uncertainty and ambiguity like strength training, strong mind and body because a strong body equals a strong mind.

Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast — Podbean

Creating mental space

It’s so extremely logical, but we are we’ve become such sedentary creatures and we’re always sitting in a chair on our phone. And of course, you’ll be more flexible because you’ve got such so much data of solutions and possibilities and your, subconscious mind, is able to make new connections. The other important thing is it’s what you see with people who have great scientific discoveries Nobel Prize winners. All of these people, they also have, mental space.

And they had ways to sort of resynthesize what they experienced by playing violin, doing juggling unicycling going for long walks, going sailing, and doing that for hours. When do we still take time ever do nothing? Absolutely nothing. Or just react to something like violin or go for a walk. It’s often that we have a second device for doing something else or thinking about something to think different and to speak different as well.

So, what we see is that most people change when they encounter change. They say, Ah, it’s not possible. Oh, that will never happen here. And you know, all like these walls that they put up. And it’s debatable if that is very helpful. But what might be more beneficial is to always think positive and how it could be possible. And just always having that open view.

The Adaptable Mindset program

Myrna: Your, adaptable mindset program, you said that you have helped over 1000 students and a lot of entrepreneurs you know solo entrepreneurs. Tell us about your program.

Robert: So, we have an online program, which is curiosity based, it’s very playful. You can choose your own boss through the program and you can start with our nature game’s philosophy, doesn’t really matter. And just take all your inspiration and expand your mind. There is a masterclass in there as well on how to create, mental space. There is a segment on how to deal with a, fear of failure, like all things that you use during your development, and you can just choose what you need and what resonates with you.

You don’t have to do everything or actually anything at all. I don’t really mind like as long as it actually works for you. So, we’ve got the online program, and then we do workshops, and organizational transformation in these larger organizations as well. And then normally, the first week with Chief Technology Officer head of innovation, head of digital, someone in a leadership position, and then we talk about the ENA company. How other teams are structured, what people are lacking, how to stop being stressed out, these kinds of things and then make a custom program to support people in resolving these challenges. So, you get more creativity, more imagination, more mental space, because that is what most organizations need.

Myrna: That’s awesome. What’s your website?

Robert: www.adaptablemindset.com

Life Coaching

Listen To Your Heart It Reveals Your Purpose

August 2, 2022 Myrna Morris Young

One way to find your, purpose, is to notice what makes you, weep, or angry. Because that is your, heart, responding to what’s on the outside that is linked to something on your inside. For example, do you, weep, when you hear a child has been abused or a dog left outside in the heat without any water? Then maybe God wanted you to do something about this and that is why he pre-wired you to care.

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Nehemiah wept for days

We see an example of this in the, bible story, of, Nehemiah. Nehemiah, asked his brother a simple question. “How are the, Jews, finding being back home after being in captivity”

Nehemiah, brother replied “Not good. They are in trouble and disgrace because the, walls of Jerusalem, have been torn down and the gates destroyed by fire.”

When, Nehemiah, heard this, he wept for days until he felt compelled to do something about it. At the time he was not a rich man, a man of influence, or had any other qualifications to rebuild a wall; he was the Kings cup bearer. But that did not stop him from asking God to make the King favorable to his request to rebuild the, walls of Jerusalem.

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Nehemiah found his purpose

Nehemiah, had this immense calling to do something, it made him sad because he really didn’t think he could actually do anything about it. Remember he was not rich; he did not have any influence or so he thought. While serving the king wine one day, the King noticed he was sad and asked him why.

Nehemiah, replied “I am sad because the city where my ancestors are buried is in ruins.” The king asked “How can I help you?” What a strange response from a King. This is because, Nehemiah, had already petitioned God to go before him and soften the, heart, of the king.

So, Nehemiah, responded “Send me to Judah to rebuild the city where my ancestors are buried.”

The King responded “How long will you be gone?”

Again no pushback, the King did not even ask, Nehemiah, how he plans on accomplishing this task. He just said just let me know how long you will be gone!

Transform Your Mind Podverse.fm

Stacey Abrams: A present day Nehemiah

How many of you felt angry or sad at things happening around you, but felt you could do nothing about it because you are a nobody without money or influence? I have heard lots of present-day, Nehemiah, stories of men and women tackling huge issues and building a movement. The first one that comes to mind is, Stacey Abrams, in, Georgia.

Stacey did not win her groundbreaking 2018 campaign for governor, but she did not quit. She got right back to work because she understood that she didn’t need the title of governor to make a difference in the lives of Georgians.

But let’s unpack our Nehemiah story. The truly amazing thing about this story is that he completed the wall in 52 days. He, organized, what the enemy called poor feeble, Jews, to work together. Everybody did a little bit. I think today we call this, grassroots organizing, or, boots on the ground, and he did it without technology. No telephones, no internet!

How to Find Your Purpose

Why was he so successful, because it was his, purpose. It was his, soul’s purpose, and that is why the, organizing, forces in the universe came together to make it happen. How did, Nehemiah, find his, purpose? He wept for days when he heard that his people were living in shame and his, heart, told him he should do something about it.

In a similar way, your, purpose, has a way of finding you. It could jump off the page of a book you are reading, you could hear a term and like, Lifecoach, and know that is what you are supposed to do. Are you trying to find your, purpose in life? Reflect on what elicits emotion from you. Listen to your, heart. It will direct you to your, purpose.

Nehemiah, built a wall, what can you build? Can you build a community center for the youths in your community, so they can get off the streets? Can you build a school in your village, so the kids can get an education? Can you build wells in third world countries, so that poor people can drink clean water?

Conclusion

Whatever is causing you pain, you can do something about it. You are, limitless, you only need the, desire; the, organizing, power of the universe will do the rest.

This is 5 min Fridays with coach Myrna, I hope that you are on, purpose, and if not, you must learn to listen to your, heart, to find your, soul’s purpose. Join my Facebook group Lifecoach to be inspired throughout the week.

Life Coaching, life coaching blog, Personal Development, podcast

Using Your Words and Internal Dialogue to Lose Weight

November 20, 2021 Myrna Morris Young 4 Comments

How to Use Your Words To Change Eating Habits

The, words, that I used all the time was “I shouldn’t have eaten that”. Then I always pray to God for help to stop me from, binge eating. I didn’t want to, eat, all of that food, so I became like almost obsessive about, dieting, and my, relationship with food and how to, lose weight.

My guest today is Isabel Chiara.

This post is about transforming self-destructive eating behaviors with self-compassionate dialogue allowing you to, lose weight.

Listen to the full interview here:

https://www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/episodes/9356698

Introduction Eat Your Words

Isabel’s new book EAT YOUR WORDS is not the typical, self-help diet book, Instead, Isabel’s approach is a more narrative, semi-autobiographical exploration of the sensual-and-painful relationship to food so many of us can’t escape. The book expertly coaches from life lessons and experiences of the uber-relatable curvaceous girl entry into womanhood. Her hearty Italian appetite make for a complex-carb tale about the depth of our relationship with self-nourishment.

Myrna: Isabel, can you share with our listeners your own journey through, body shaming, and self-discovery?

Isabel: Of course. In my own journey, food, eating and, dieting, has always been a big point of contention my whole life. It was through this non-acceptable way that I eat and always focus on the food. I always guilty after eating, like I shouldn’t have eaten it. My internal dialogue was always on how to, lose weight.

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Your Words are important if you want to Lose weight

I started using, words, like there’s a certain way to, eat, there’s a certain way to be with food, and, diet. Each day I try to do it, there was always a new, diet. That is what has been the journey of my life. It’s been a journey of the kind of needs to come to terms with on some level and I think the, body shaming, was me telling myself my body is this way because I ate all that food and that was no way to, lose weight.

Many times in my book, my main character, I say she’s walking around with no head. This is to highlight that sometimes we are disconnected our head from our body. It’s a very common feeling or a life existence that is happening on some level. It’s kind of introspection book on the whole journey of the, body shaming, and coming to terms with the body, mind and spirit on some level.

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Lose weight: Stop the negative self talk

Myrna: How did you transition from walking around kind of discombobulated – which is a word where you’re not connected and then you got to the point where you’re going to, eat your words, because you’re not going to be telling yourself these negative things about food. What was your transition? Did you go to a Therapist?

Isabel: There have been a million people involved in this process, because you’re always a person with focus and you’re always trying to come up with a resolution to stop, self destructive eating and how to, lose weight. It’s almost like I became a researcher. It was really a journey of finding what was really in my own soul, what was I really like?

What’s up with me?
What’s bothering me?
What’s the pain about?
What am I trying to stuff down with food?
Why can’t I, lose weight?

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The Mind Body Connection to Lose Weight

If your body and mind are disconnected, you can’t even figure out what your, words, are saying to you. I saying to myself on a daily basis, a lot of negative, words, about myself and my body. I saying these, words, to myself before I, eat, and after I, eat.

What happens is when you take yourself to task on some level, when you start to really become conscious, you notice your, words. First thing I became conscious was I knew I needed to be in my body. Because when you are out of your body you eat unconsciously. For different people, it’s different things. I started to work out because I needed to feel my body and I was out of it. You can’t, lose weight, if you are not in your body.

The other thing was, as long as you’re feeling your body, then you get to hear your, words, and what you’re saying to yourself. So, the, words, started to become more conscious. What I have realized lately is that to be out of your body, you have to be really busy with things. If you’re busy, then you also have those, words, that are saying – oh! I’m so busy, I didn’t, eat, all day long and I’m starving. Now, I have a permission to just, eat, whatever I want, wherever I want and it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter which is what we say to ourselves. So you sabotage your efforts to, lose weight.

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Self destructive Eating

Myrna: Where did your, self destructive eating, habits come from? I know you mentioned that you’re Italian and, Italian food, has a lot of carbs and pastas and things like that. Is that where your, eating habits, came from?

Isabel: Yes, except for Italians are for the most part are thin! I mean I’m in the restaurant business. I started my whole life in a family restaurant business, so my focus in life became food. At an early age, when we made food, we made huge meals. I never knew what a, portion size, was like. I never used the, words, portion size, until I was in my 30s and 40s!

I would go to my friend’s homes and they would have like a bit of rice, or a bit of meat. I was like confused when I was younger, because that was never what happened at our house. I understand now the, portion size, mentality that really showed up in my whole scope of thought. My whole thought pattern shifted and I became conscious that large portion sizes defeats my ability to, lose weight.

I was no longer eating like I was at an you can eat buffet. My, eating habits, as a child made me end up with this buffet mentality.

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Coping with Words and Body Shaming

Myrna: At some point in time, you developed, body shame. You took me through your self-discovery, how did you use your, words, to stop, body shaming and accepting that you are a curvaceous girl?

Isabel: Body shaming, comes when you start a comparison with other people who are a certain size. You see people in a certain way and then you start looking at yourself as different. Each time you talk to people, you’re like wait, why don’t I look like you? But it doesn’t matter because we already internalized that there’s something wrong with us.

Whatever we look like, we want to be someone else. People start to say oh, for a little girly you’re eating a lot. Then you start to make a correlation with; I’m eating a lot, there’s weight here and there’s something wrong with what’s happening in me. I’m not okay and that’s how one starts to develop, body shame.

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Self destructive binge eating

Myrna: Why do you think we purposely distract ourselves when making food choices to the detriment of our health and, binge eating?

Isabel: I’m not a psychologist, I just know. I’ve been looking at this behavior for a long time. What I think is that we distract ourselves because we don’t want to feel the things that is going on in our life. I think a lot of times, when we do choose, binge eating, we are actually eating food as a distraction.

Maybe the right hand doesn’t know what the left hand is doing kind of thing. A lot of times, we start to, eat, because we start to feel something’s coming up. It doesn’t matter what it is, it could be happy, it could be sad, it could be like anger and/or even bored. I, eat, when I’m bored.

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Notice what going on in your body before you eat that food

When there’s nothing going on, there’s still something going on in your body. If there’s something going on your body, but you’re not present to it or you don’t want to know what it is or what for every reason, you’re not used to it. I think a lot of times people don’t recognize their feelings or they judge their feelings.

I’m a night time eater. I could do all day long with no food (because every emotion from the day maybe was just piled up), but at night, I’m like a wreck for that. Not for nighttime or for that one time and it’s all starting to come up and then we’re like let’s just go for it and we start, binge eating.

Myrna: Yes, that has been my biggest struggle for a long period of time. I couldn’t stop eating at night. It’s a little under control now, but that was my biggest struggle for a while.

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Diet and Nutrition

Isabel: I decided to lose the word, diet. I decided to do something different for myself which eventually added more nourishment and nutrition to my day. I first started with being in my body, and then I used my, words, to say let me give myself food instead of saying, I’m going to take away food and I’m not going to eat this.

I started giving myself different foods, I allowed myself to have more nutritious foods and I started creating a new mindset. This new mindset was alright. I was totally resistant to this, but I started finding a place that had green drinks. I could have green drinks which took the edge off of hunger and it made me feel in my body. So, instead of going into the business of my whole day, I’m going to add a green drink. Just one thing, I added nutrition instead of taking something away, I was going to give myself things.

If someone once likes eating at night, instead of having the bad things we want to, eat, at night you and what would you give what did you give yourself to replace that because a green drink. Just starting to give yourself other more nutritional things maybe you want to give yourself more vegetables than that and rice.

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Transform your Mind Podcast Index

Using Your Words to Change your Mindset

Myrna: How can those of us struggling with, weight gain, and a pure relationship to food face the issue head-on?

Isabel: The first thing I say is to, change your mindset. Start creating an intention for yourself and start creating a, mindset, that you’re in the middle of the process. I always like to say we’re always in the middle of the process and that we are shifting. We’re always shifting and we’re always changing, even though it looks really bad – it always looks really bad before it gets really good. We’re going to start to use the right, words.

Myrna: Tell us about your book “Eat Your Words”, why you wrote it and what do you want someone that’s reading it to walk away with?

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Book: Eat your Words

Isabel: The book was a way to be conscious for myself like it really was. I wrote it for myself like a journal. I was really writing a book, but it was the stories of my life. So the goal was for me to get to some kind of resolution in my life. The stories are for people to really understand that they’re not struggling in this arena by themselves. This is really to bring the behaviors to consciousness and to show anybody that he/she is not the only one going through this. I mean most of the world is going through this on some level.

Now you become conscious of what the, words, are and how they affected our behaviors and through that, there is healing that can be done when you see something that somebody else is doing and you hear what their process is. I bring up a lot of processes.

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Myrna: Where does the, “Eat Your Words,” come from? I’m assuming it’s internal dialogue.

Isabel: “Eat Your Words,” is internal dialogue and it starts at the origins of the family.

Myrna: It’s all about inner dialogue? But the inner dialogue as you can imagine is kind of runs your life and it could be conscious or unconscious.

Isabel: It wasn’t so sometimes.

Myrna: It’s unconscious right?

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Isabel: It was the, words, that I would say, as my mantra was, oh I don’t care. The biggest, words, were “oh I don’t care”. However, once you start saying I don’t care, it doesn’t just apply to what you are eating. It really becomes what you start to say to yourself, the, words, you use.

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Oh I don’t care about myself
So I don’t care what I put in my body.
Anyway I don’t care what becomes of my life.

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Conclusion

Myrna: How can readers connect with you and get a copy of your book?

Isabel: If anyone wants to get the first chapter of my book, just to see if they like it or if it works for them, they can go to https://isabel-chiara.com, on that page, they could download the first chapter for free or they could just buy the book on Amazon.

We also have a membership site called Healing and Activation Process Integrations. Happy place is what I call it. It’s going to be a lot of processes that are going to help people to get inside of themselves. It can move things and look at things differently and channel them differently.

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Life Coaching, Personal Development, personal development podcast, podcast, talk show

Why is Transformation Of Your Mind Important?

July 21, 2021 Myrna Morris Young

When we talk about the, transformation, of the mind, it is not simply about changing or adjusting how you think, but renewing your sense of, self-consciousness. Transformation, of your mind, impacts your conscience, which is your sense of what is right and wrong. It impacts your heart, which in Hebrew literature is the center of your being.

Transformation, of your mind, runs much deeper than simply making confessions and changing how you think upon a thing. Apostle Paul teaches “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind”

Pastor William L Glover speaks on the biblical principles of what God meant when He said “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”

Listen to the full interview here:

https://www.buzzsprout.com/1761155/8876218

Pastor Glover just completed a powerful series on, renewing the mind, it was a four part series, you can watch the full series on the Mount Hermon Ministries YouTube Channel. But today we’re going to pick some of the important pieces of that, renewing your mind, series to share with you.

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Bio and Intro for Pastor William L Glover

Dr. William L. Glover is the Senior Pastor of Mount Hermon Ministries. He also oversees the Dew of Hermon Early Learning Center and is Campus Director of Life Christian University at Mount Hermon Ministries. He has a strong mandate for Education, Missions, Leadership Development, Justice Ministry and reaching the lost for Christ.

Having ministered in nine different countries on 29 international trips, Dr. Glover is an anointed teacher, preacher, and international speaker. He has assembled ministry and medical teams that have seen thousands of souls saved and thousands more received desperately needed medical care. His passion is to reach the globe, but God has fashioned his heart in the shape of Africa.

Through Mount Hermon Ministries, he is very involved in reaching his community through educational empowerment. He is a founding board member of L.I.F.E (Lee Interfaith for Empowerment), a Network of Congregations committed to finding solutions to systemic justice issues in Lee County; is an Executive Board Member of Healthy Lee, a group of faith, business and health professions committed to inspiring healthy life styles, and chairs the Religious Affairs Committee of the local branch of the NAACP. Dr. Glover is also Co-Founder (with Pastor Cheryl Glover) of Redeeming Influence Community Outreach, a non-profit that serves blighted communities.

Dr. Glover has earned a Bachelor of Arts degree in Bible and Theology from Southeastern University (formally Bible College), a Master of Arts degree in Religion from Florida State University, a Master of Education degree in counseling from Florida A & M University, and his Doctor of Ministry degree in Theology from Life Christian University.

Dr. Glover is also the author of the three books: Justice: God, Nations, and Systems, which examines the role of faith in addressing systemic justice issues which plague the systems of men; 30 Days of Excellence, a daily devotional that focuses on cultivating a culture of excellence in Faith, in Speech and in Life; and Ready for the Harvest, a study on how to release the principle of seedtime and harvest into your life.

Book: Ready for the Harvest Transform Your Mind Podcast

Dr. Glover is married to Pastor Cheryl Glover. Four wonderful adult children enhance their lives: Brittney, Jade, Jana and William II. Dr. Glover credits God for His demonstration of goodness and continues to trust in His faithfulness throughout his Pastoral Ministry.

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What Does God Mean By Renewing the Mind

Myrna – My first question to you Pastor Glover is why did why do you think God wanted you to preach on, renewing your mind?

Pastor Glover – that’s an excellent question Myrna. I ended the 2020 year with a series of messages entitled, living in your redemption. The idea being that God had already paid the price for redemption and that he’s redeemed our lives from destruction.

Whatever destruction has occurred in our lives, be it:

personal,
financial,
relational
emotional
mental

God has already invested in the price to redeem and restore us from that destruction. That message was received so well that I began to contemplate well how do I get people to embrace that, mindset, and the, renewing your mind, messages were born. If a person can hear something, but if it’s not internalized and if it’s not received, then it’s not going to have an impact on their lives.

So that series of, transformation, of your mind, messages was born out of that realization of moving people from the point of where they are, to living in the redemption and, renewing their minds.

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Transformation of the 3 parts of your mind

Myrna – you talked about the three different parts of the, mind, that God wants transformed.

Can you share with us the three different parts of the, mind?

Pastor Glover – Sure there are different aspects to each individual sermon, but the broad overview is the reason the, mind, is important is found in the wisdom literature. Scripture reveals that the, mind, is connected to and influences:

our psyche
our conscious
and our heart

When we talk about, renewing of the mind, it is not simply about changing or adjusting how you think, but it impacts your sense of, self-consciousness. It impacts your, conscience, which is your sense of what is right and wrong. It impacts your heart, which in Hebrew literature is the center of your being.

So, renewing your mind, runs much deeper than simply making confessions and changing how you think upon a thing. Apostle Paul teaches “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the, renewing of your mind”

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There are 3 action verbs in this sentence.

transformed
renewing of the mind
conformed

One is internal and one is external. It impacts our, psyche, our consciousness, and our heart. So it is the, transformation, of the total person, the total being.

What is the Flexible mind, the Fluid Mind and the Fixed Mind?

We need to have a conversation about what kind of, mindset, you are working with.

Is your, mindset, flexible?
Is your, mindset, fluid?
Or do you have a, fixed mindset? Which could be good or bad depending on what it’s fixed on.

When we talk about the, psyche, the, psyche, being your sense of, self-consciousness. Why do we need, renewing of your mind, in your sense of, self-consciousness? Because it’s our sense of awareness, our sense of, self-worth. It also is our mental and emotional health, so if your, mind, is not flexible, you need work in your sense of awareness.

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The Flexible Mindset is best for Transformation

Some people who are not self-aware or there’s some people who suffer from, low self-esteem, or there’s some people who are damaged mentally and emotionally. If you don’t have a, flexible mindset, which means pliable then you will resist God doing the eternal work in your, psyche, to, transform your mind. So, in order for, transformation, to occur you have to have a, flexible mindset.

There can be no, transformation, if you’re unwilling to change.

The Fluid Mindset

Conversely a, fluid mindset, means that you are evolving, you are open to change. If you don’t have a, fluid mindset, you internalize and have what some call “stinking thinking.” You have a toxic, mindset, about yourself or about people. For instance oftentimes when people experience hurt in a relationship, they’ll say I’ll never trust another man again or I’ll never trust another woman again.

So, if you don’t have a, fluid mindset, you’re not willing to let that, transformation, happen and embrace truth.

The Fixed Mindset

The third, mindset, you mentioned was a, fixed mindset. Just like when we lay concrete, we have to do the work before the concrete sets, because once it sets it’s fixed. So, we have to be careful what we let set in our minds. We have to do the work while the concrete is fluid and pliable.

A, fixed mindset, is like set concrete.

Transformation, of the mind, is like renovation of a house. You’ve got to rip out things, knock down walls or beliefs before you can put in the new things or new learnings.

When we’re inviting God to, transform your mind, then we have to understand our, psyche, our, self-consciousness, and our heart. That’s why the, mind, is so important because it is connected to all of these aspects of the human person and they’re all interrelated yet distinct.

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The Fixed Mindset is Like Concrete

Myrna – Someone with a, fixed mindset, like concrete why did you say that God can use this person?

In the, Life coaching, world, when we talk about a, fixed mindset, we’re saying that there’s no growth in this person. But if your, mind, is set like concrete, is it possible for it to be changed?

Pastor Glover – Well yes but again you must have awareness of your, fixed mindset. You can get at that concrete two different ways. Through, transformation, which speaks to internal work that has to be done. The word, transformation, comes from the Greek word metamorphosis and so that speaks of going through a, transformation, but it starts from the inside out.

The other word that’s used is, renewing, which literally has to do with renovating. When concrete sets, the only way to change it is to get a jackhammer and that’s very painful work. People oftentimes will not choose to do that work, because it is painful, noisy, and messy. But if you’re going to lay a new foundation in your life, you must do the, mental, emotional and spiritual work to jackhammer a, fixed mindset.

Myrna – How can God jackhammer to change that, fixed mindset?

Fixed mindset in marital relationships

Pastor Glover – I think an example in the context of, relationships, particularly in the context of, marital relationships, a lot of work that has to be jackhammered in counseling sessions really has to do those, fixed mindsets, about marriage that have been set, but are toxic and are not healthy.

Couples have very different ideas about the foundation of a, marriage, and what it should be about. It is really about how men and women are socialized in our society. Young girls are socialized towards inter interdependent relationships. That’s means they play together, they share much more readily than men do. They are invested in group success as they are reared and everybody kind of having a good time.

Boys are socialized totally different. They are taught to stand on your own two feet, be independent. Be a man, don’t share your emotions. So, men are much less equipped than women in, marital relationships, to handle a, fixed mindset, that’s why women are 10 times more verbal than men.

One of the fun exercises I like to do when I’m dealing with, communication, is I’ll ask the man and the woman to get a sheet of paper and have each one writes me all the feeling words they are aware of. The woman’s list is four times longer than the man,

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How can God Use a Fixed Mindset?

I’m curious though you also say in your message that God can use a, fixed mindset.

Pastor Glover – When you lay concrete, it’s properly set, it is suitable for what you want to build on it. So, let’s pull in this conversation, purpose and destiny. If you have great purpose or great destiny, you have to take the time to lay the foundation. If your foundation is fixed, God can build on it.

People do not take the time to factor in the type of foundation they need to lay to accommodate their dreams and visions of what they want. That can be applied to anything, in my book “30 Days of Excellence” I teach that excellence is in the foundation that you lay for, purpose and destiny.

Be ye not conformed to the world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

Why did God say that do not be transformed to the world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind?

The World is Battling for your Mind

Pastor William L Glover – Because it is all a battle for the, mind. This simple principle is found in Proverbs.

“As a man thinketh so is he”

Your, mindset, determines the reflection of who you are and it determines who you will be.
We would never be greater than our thoughts about things.
We would never rise above our thoughts about things.
We will never allow ourselves to be pulled beneath our thoughts about things.
Our thoughts reflect where we are going.

It’s a battle for your, mind. The world we live in today, people don’t want to do the work, to think for themselves. There is professional, think tanks, and these, think tanks, think for people and feed them what to believe, what to say.

They all are vying for our, minds, we don’t tune in to learn anymore from the news, we tune in to determine what we need to think. So, hence “do not be conformed to the world, but be transformed by the, renewing of your mind.

That, transformation,

happens through the word of God,
that, transformation, happens through your relationship with God
that, transformation, happens through a community of faith like-minded believers who are committed to growth.

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Transformation is from the heart.

Your, heart, which is the center of your being, the seat of your soul and this is important because wisdom literature teaches us that we should guard your heart for from it flow the issues of life.

Everything that matters, that’s important to us impacts our, heart. If the, heart, is injured, broken or unhealthy because the, heart, plumps the pumps the blood. The, heart, pumps the influence of that thing to your spirit and to your soul and to your body.

So, when we talk about the, transformation, then it’s holistic and God is always at work in our lives trying to move us to a place of wholeness in all three of these areas as it pertains to renewal and, transformation.

Conclusion

As we wrap up how can listeners connect with Mt Hermon Ministries Fort Myers? Tell us about your books and how we can connect on social media.

You can connect with our ministry, we are currently streaming on YouTube and Facebook at MT Hermon Ministries. You can join us Sundays at 11 a.m. you can go to our website.

https://www.mthermonministries.org/ to get some information on our ministry.

I am the author of three books:

https://www.amazon.com/JUSTICE-Nations-William-L-Glover/dp/0982910592

The justice book which is about your community of faith finding relative relevance as a change agent in your community

30 Days of Excellence which is a 30-day devotion that cultivates habits of excellence in your life and
Ready for the Harvest which teaches us how to apply the principle of seed time and harvest in our lives and all these can be found on Amazon.

You can contact me personally at dr.wmglover0613@gmail.com

My Spiritual Father Helped in the Renewing of My Mind

I enjoyed the conversation, so thank you like we’ve known each other for 14 years let me also state how proud I am of you forging the way. I remember when you began this journey and witnessing your evolution and growth. Witnessing how God is enlarging your territory, makes me very proud. I want to encourage you to continue that journey.

Myrna – Thank you Pastor and I’ll share something publicly with you that when I wrote my book and you said that you’re proud of me, it brought tears to my eyes because it was the first

Time someone told me that. My father had never said he was proud of me.

As my spiritual father thank you so much for saying that I appreciate it. God sent me to you specifically I didn’t share our story of how I came to be under your guidance, but our connection has a purpose.

Thank you for tuning in to the Transform your Mind to Transform your Life radio podcast and television show. If you are um listening on iTunes I would love for you to subscribe, rate and review. I also want to invite you to join my Facebook group called Lifecoach.

Until next time sending you all Blessings

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May 29, 2021 Myrna Morris Young

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May 28, 2021 Myrna Morris Young

Sponsor this, Looking local audience for your service or product plus Global exposure from a worldwide podcast? Sponsor the Transform Your Mind Radio/Podcast

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I asked the question on Quora ‘Why was podcast marketing was on the rise”

Simply put, because audience is large, consuming, podcasts, frequently, in variety, and much longer than other media. Best yet, this audience continues to grow year over year.

Podcast, creators in turn provide not only variety but also depth of conversations so advertisers can pick exactly the audience they want, and activate a very relevant message to that particular message.

The facts and details:

Large audience: in the US alone, 40+ million people listen to podcasts on a weekly basis. Almost 70 million on a monthly basis!
Growing audience in all demographics: year over year growth of 20–25% in all demographics and ages
Variety of shows and episodes: for the people that watch, the average number of podcasts watched is 3+, and the average number of episodes is 5+ on a weekly basis
Long exposure: average duration of an episode being around 1 Hour, that means that Podcast listeners spend on average 5 hours listening to audio weekly. Compare that to the (continually plunging) number of hours spent on newspaper, magazine, radio, and TV… very competitive
Personable like never before: the Podcast experience is a very intimate one. People are either adding colors to the stories they are told, putting themselves into the topics, or having their questions answered. It’s a new level of connection to media

As a, podcast, sponsor this is a compelling case to consider, podcasts, as media vehicle investment:

Finally, clearly defined audiences: with other media, specially broadcast, marketers were speaking to larger audiences, but also very diverse. Only mass-adoption products would make economical sense for advertising.
So we can tell ever more relevant stories and thus powerful messages: With, podcasts, interests are narrowly defined. This is a marketer’s heaven: tell an unique, crisp, interesting idea to an audience that is known. This message specificity will drive massive action: Product consideration and purchase, adherence to social communities, and increased loyalty and recommendation.

I see a promising future for, podcasts, and, podcast sponsors, the opportunity to connect with people in a personable yet scalable way.

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The Transform your Mind radio and, podcast, airs every week on the afternoon drive 5 pm to 6 pm on WDJY 99.1 FM, in the Metro Atlanta area and on the internet on internet radio at www.wdjyfm.com. The target audience are minority women between the ages of 25 to 55 years old who want to improve the quality of their lives through Life coaching and a Mindset shift.

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How Leaders Use Curiosity As Their Human Edge in a Digital Economy

May 8, 2021 Myrna Morris Young

Greg Orme, Forbes contributor and Author of the Business book of the Year 2020 “The Human Edge: How curiosity and creativity are your superpowers in the digital economy” shares, leadership, tips on thriving in a world of accelerating change through, creative thinking, curiosity, and consciousness. Greg shares with, leaders, how to remove the threat of, ai, machines taking their jobs by excelling at the 4C’s, consciousness, curiosity, creativity, and collaboration.

I’m delighted to be here Myrna, I think we first came across each other through my one of my Forbes articles.

Myrna – Yes, I was browsing through Linkedin and I came across your article on, gratitude, and when I clicked on it, I noticed that you had a book that was awarded Business book of the year. So, I decided to invite you on the show.

Listen the the Full Interview Here:

Greg – Well isn’t serendipity great? Those algorithms brought us together. I’m coming from you Stratford in the UK and you’re on the west coast in Florida, what an amazing world we live in. I’m very grateful for that.

How Can Leaders develop the Human Edge

Myrna – I am sure it was an honor to have the award of business book of the year. I know your book was specifically designed for, leaders, but we’re all individual, leaders. We have to lead ourselves first before we can lead others.

Why did you write The, Human Edge? Can you give us a little background on your research for this topic and why we need a, human edge, in this digital and computer age?

Greg – That’s a great question, four years or so, I became really interested in one of the big issues of our lifetime. Which is our human relationship with this machine age of, ai.

We all have smartphones that we carry around with us. We never leave them anywhere; this thing called, artificial intelligence, is here to stay.

What skills Leaders need to stay Relevant

After a speech one day on, leadership, one of the female CEO’s came up to me and said Greg , I’m kind of interested in the, organizational change, stuff; but what skills do I need to remain relevant in the next 10 years?

That question led me to start the journey which led to the book, The Human Edge. Even though I’m in the, leadership, business the, Human Edge, is for anyone. It’s a little manual for your own humanity that even if your boss is a bit toxic you can keep under your desk and it’s hopefully the keys to some of your own potential.

Myrna – I remember when the digital age started about the mid 80s, I was working at a bank and everybody was really worried about the ATM machines replacing tellers in the bank; but banks still need tellers 40 years later.

Should we be worried about AI machines taking over our jobs?

Greg – Of course we have been worried about, ai, machines as a race of, humans, for a long long time. I think the first anti-machine story was written in the Greek age about a kind of killer robot, and of course we’ve had the, terminator, and all sorts of machines taking over routine jobs.

We’re worried about these, machines, taking us over and being aggressive and of course somebody wise once said about, technology. We always overestimate the impact of, technology, in the short term; but underestimate it in the long term.

Technology, ai, in particular has long term implications for, leaders. Self-learning algorithms make, ai, smarter and smarter. It’s very difficult for the human brain to really get our heads around, AI, but, leaders, are starting to get ahead of the curve.

My book, the Human Edge, is a hopeful book.

I don’t think most, leaders, should worry about, artificial intelligence, unless your job is simple and can be replaced by a, machine.

Computer scientists call this an algorithmic job i.e routine. You can plan out every keystroke and every process within that job.

An example would be telemarketers, people who are on a script, jobs like those organizing data in a library, even long distance truck drivers; because autonomous driving is really, ai, technology. Another job going to, ai, is customer service, you can never get someone on the phone when you call major corporations anymore. The, ai, machine can have a conversation with callers and handle most calls without the help of a live agent.

Ai , technology will slice away the very routine tasks that we all do, like booking flights or booking a haircut or booking a restaurant. What’s interesting is it leaves a, human, shaped hole for our careers. We’re seeing capabilities and skills that were admired as, leaders, in the early 80s to late 90s are now being admired again.

Leaders need the Human Edge — The Human Edge

Human Skills that can protect you against AI

Leaders, need Human skills, like:

passion,
gratitude,
empathy,
curiosity,
creativity, are valued.

LinkedIn looked at 20 million job applications in 2020. They noticed that employers are looking for , leaders, with , creative thinking. This is partly to do with, technology, coming into the workplace. Employers need thinking outside the boxes.

Myrna – What is the difference between, creative thinking, and, critical thinking?

Greg- Critical thinking, is being able to analyze a situation and come up with one solution. It has always been admired in the workplace. I think, critical thinking, is one of the top 10 skills employers are looking for in, leaders.

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The 4C’s of the Human Edge

Creative thinking, is a way of connecting one’s domain of knowledge over here with another over there and create a whole new innovation or idea. An example of , leaders, with , creative thinking, are Larry Page and Sergey Brin of Google. Google is the creation of two ideas from different worlds that came together.

Myrna – In your book you talk about the 4Cs of the, Human Edge. What are they?

Greg – The first C is, consciousness. Consciousness, is the ability to find meaning in your work.

The second C is curiosity
The third C is creativity
The fourth C is collaboration

Ai machines do not have Consciousness

Myrna – I love the one that you started with, consciousness, because, consciousness, is the big word today and encompasses, awareness, and spirituality. It is a great, human edge, because obviously, ai, doesn’t have, consciousness. How are using it in this context of the, human edge?

Greg – Machines that use, artificial intelligence, don’t ask why? They ask “How do I do this, they ask what do you want to do, but they don’t ask why.”

Understanding why you do things has been a very powerful human trait especially for, leaders. Understanding and being able to articulate in some way your own why is hugely motivational. It releases huge power in yourself as a person. We’ve all met people who have a why and they’ve got shiny eyes and go the extra mile. They’ll work through the night if necessary.

The science of neuroscience data shows that we can actually see the brain light up if you’re living a purposeful life or your best life. The brain releases a chemical called, dopamine, which is the motivation molecule.

The other part of, consciousness, in my model is actually finding the time in your day to observe all the, leaders, and managers in your organization. I literally meet thousands of, leaders, each year through the London business school. If we’re not careful the, ai, enabled algorithms that drive social media, our day is shattered into a thousand pieces and we never actually find time to be curious or creative.

Curiosity gives you a Human Edge

I talk a lot in, The Human Edge, about how you redesign your day to ensure that you have parts of it where you’re not being distracted.

Myrna – True, your why is very important. It’s the only thing that is actually going to get you to your end goal. If you know your why, you will persevere when life knocks you down.

How does, curiosity, give you a, human edge?

Greg – Organizations are asking for people who have built up their, curiosity, in order to drive their own learning. What we’ve seen during the pandemic is many of the disruptors that were moving the world forward at a lightning pace have been accelerated.

One of my former clients, the World Economic Forum, estimate that something like every 18 months or so about 40 percent of what we know becomes obsolete and we need to learn new things. So, the ability to learn rapidly and, curiosity, has become hugely important for any career.

So, the magical thing about, curiosity, is it’s not a fixed trait. You were born with blue eyes and with certain physical factors that you can’t do anything about. Curiosity, is something that you can flex, develop. Like the mercury in a thermometer, it goes up and down depending on what you’re doing every day. It’s like a muscle you can build it up.

Open Ended Questions foster Curiosity

One of the techniques I share for, leaders, in, The Human Edge, to help you build up your, curiosity, is the Five hour rule.

Questions are good for, curiosity; but only a certain type of question. Open ended questions, is preferred to, closed questions. I was a journalist once myself and, closed questions, are useful for checking information or sometimes you want a yes or no answer, but for, curiosity, you need, open ended questions.

Open ended questions, are really powerful for, leaders. Questions like:

What if we tried it this way?
Have you seen what those guys are doing over there?
Do you think we could do that too?

Open ended questions, not only to inspire your own, curiosity, but it sparks, curiosity, it in the people around you.

Ai machines can’t come up with Creativity

Myrna – So now lets talk about, creativity. I know that it is like a top, human edge, because employers want, leaders, who think outside of the box. It is definitely a way to differentiate yourself from, ai.

Greg – Organizations need systems, they also need bureaucracy to run them because they’re very large entities; but what most of the, leaders, that I’m working with across multiple industries are trying to do is trying to find the space where there are fewer rules.

They encourage, leaders, to come with their ideas and, creativity. You cannot really be creative unless you’re first insatiably curious. Curiosity, is about asking questions, you’re interrogating the world and challenging the status quo, but you’re also importantly gathering cognitive fuel for your brain.

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Creativity is the characteristic of the World’s Wealthiest

This is why if you look at the life stories of highly successful people, they all talk about, curiosity, and their ability to learn as a foundational skill. Oprah Winfrey talked about, curiosity, and books getting her where she is today. Jeff Bezos was a was a curious learner.

Elon Musk is I think currently the world’s richest man. He has as disrupted multiple industries; but it’s important to realize that even Elon Musk talented he is. When he was as a young boy in South Africa before he came to Canada, he was not the finished product. Elon Musk built his ability to think differently and his, curiosity, through a lifelong of learning. Spacex which is one of his more interesting ventures to disrupt commercial travel to the moon and beyond, got that idea, because he was so fascinated in rocketry and space travel.

How is Collaboration a Human Edge Characteristic

Myrna – Our last C is, collaboration. Collaboration, is a, human edge, of being able to bring talents together to create something bigger.

Collaboration, is what you need if you are creative, because you need to come together with other, humans, to get your ideas off the ground.

Greg – You’re correct Myrna. Collaboration, is a very human trait to be able to gather similar or maybe opposite characteristics and bring them together to create something big.

We’ve talked about, consciousness, that gives you the energy and the motivation and the time because of focus. Then we touched on, curiosity, which gives you the fuel.

Collaboration, works when you have a large network of, collaborators. Leaders, are more, innovative, because they’ve got these connections and people can help them with their ideas. So, how do you ensure that your network is big enough and varied enough to help you? Then I talk about experimentation, how you can take these ideas and test them very quickly get some data on it and feedback.

Business Book of the Year 2020 – The Human Edge

Myrna – Your book was awarded Business Book of the Year, because you were talking about, leadership, skills for people and preventing, leaders, from being obsolete by the emergence of ,ai. You mentioned in your bio that you were redundant in 2008 and that’s basically what took you on this journey to discover the, human edge. If we learn these skills can they insulates, leaders, from being redundant?

Greg – Absolutely, my story like most, leaders, did not work out the way that I had planned. It’s the parts where you go wrong in the creative process, where you can learn the most and move forward.

Myrna – Tell our readers how they can get a copy of your book. You also speak all around the world so tell us how organizations can contact you if they’re interested in you speaking at one of their executive functions.

Greg – Thanks for the opportunity. If people want to check out my work it’d be a great idea to just go to my website www.gregorme.com there they can see some videos of me speaking and they can actually get in touch with me through the get in touch function on the website.

Conclusion

There’s one other thing, I’ve just launched something that’s really taking off. A newsletter called the Curious Human. This is a complimentary email for, leaders, sent straight to your inbox once a month.

This is the kind of byproduct you were talking about on your podcast. A byproduct of a business writer’s life, because I’m always writing my Forbes pieces or my new books or I have got a great podcast I’ve heard or an interesting book I’ve read or an article or a video. What I do each month is I share that in a two-minute kind of bulletin to the people who have signed up for my emails.

You can sign up on my website, at the bottom of every page there’s a space where you can sign up for the newsletter. If they’d would like to follow me on social media, I think the best place is LinkedIn, that is where I’m most active.

I’d be delighted to connect with people. Also, on Forbes I’ve got my own regular column. If you put Greg Orme Forbes in the search, I will come up. I’m writing regularly on Forbes.

The book “The Human Edge: How curiosity and creativity are your superpowers in the digital economy” is on Amazon and anywhere books are sold.

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Additional Resources

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Property management services, real estate coaching, Real Estate services

Real Estate Property Management: 6 Tips to getting Good Tenants

April 14, 2021 Myrna Morris Young 4 Comments

As a, Real Estate, property manager, and, real estate, investor I offer my clients the peace of mind of long term tenants, who take care of their property and pay their rent on time.

Yes that is the goal of all, real estate investors, especially out of town investors who can’t manage their properties themselves.

What does a Real Estate Property Manager do?

As a, Real Estate, property manager, I offer a unique proposition for my local market of , Fort Myers, Fl. I will:

market your listing on the MLS, Zillow, Apartments.com, Craigslist
screen tenants over the phone before scheduling showing appointment
show property to qualified tenants
do background check on all adults, including rental references and job
If qualified, prepare legal lease and collect holding deposit
organize any repairs needed to get property ready for new tenants
move in tenants and collect first month rent and security deposits
be the agent for any notices for maintenance
organize or dispatch any maintenance repairs
All these services are FREE with the listing of the home or condo.

My fee is the standard one month rent that other realtors collect just for showing your property and putting in the MLS

Off loading the task of finding good tenants to a, real estate, property manager, limits the occurrences of having bad tenants who:

don’t pay their rent on time
who destroy your property
who don’t pay at all and you have to evict
who disturb the peace and cause problems with the HOA

Some other benefits of hiring a, realtor property manager, to find you good tenants:

Saves you time of dealing with all the calls, showings etc
As a, Realtor property manager, I have access to other Realtors in the MLS and their clients
As a, Realtor property manager, I know the areas that can command the highest rents
As a, Realtor property manager, I can do research on areas and prices on the multiple listing service and public records
As a, Realtor property manager, I have access to off market discount properties so you can buy your real estate investment property at discount prices thus lowering your monthly carrying costs.
As a, Realtor property manager, the biggest benefit to you is that you can get into the HOT Florida real estate market while living in the North. Your, Realtor property manager, will be your feet on the street.

Some other services I provide:

Do you have a property to sell? As a, Realtor, I offer the same all inclusive service to help you market your property and get top dollar
Looking to Buy a home owner occupied or as a, real estate investor? I have access to property on the MLS, Zillow, Craigslist, pocket listings and off market discount properties
If you are a cash buyer and looking for rehab properties, I work with local wholesalers to get you inventory.
As a, Realtor property manager, I can offer you a turnkey investment. I find the property, find the tenant, move in the tenant, you collect the rent!

“The Ultimate Beginners Guide to Real Estate Investments”

If you are new to investing, start today and be on your way to becoming an Automatic Millionaire Real Estate Investor. Properties in the USA average about a 5% increase in value every year. My first investment property I bought 35 years ago for $185,000 is worth over $1,000,000 today. That story can be heard all over the country. There are more millionaires being made from real estate investing than any other investment.

Call Myrna Young at 239-542-5777 Century 21 Selling Paradise and to schedule your listing or property management consultation or email me at info@myhelps.us.

You can also check out my blog https://blog.myhelps.us/ and subscribe to my iTunes podcast to listen the Transform your Mind podcast and receive weekly tips, Life coaching advice, and, Realtor property management, tips and strategies.

Looking for Available properties on the MLS check out my link http://myhelps.us/fort-myers-realtor/

Some past episodes:

How to Create the Freedom Lifestyle through Real Estate Investments.

How to Invest in Real Estate with No Money

Executive Coaching, Leadership Coaching, Life Coaching, motivation, Personal Development, setting goals, Spiritual Fulfillment, Spiritual Life Coaching, Uncategorized

How to Overcome Fear and Find Joy

April 8, 2021 Myrna Morris Young

Fear is an energy. How to overcome fear, is to control your thoughts. Your thoughts are the most powerful energy force in the universe.

Thoughts, can be either positive or negative.

Heading up the rear of, negative thoughts, is fear.

Fear, is the bottom feeder or all the emotions.

Do not Let Fear Linger in your body or mind

How to overcome fear, is not to let it linger in your body and in your mind, because It will not only attract the thing you, fear, the most into your experience; but it will also bring disease to your body.

All diseases can be traced back to, negative thoughts, and, fear.

Negative thoughts, transform your body into an acidic state.

Fear, is a negative thought magnified to the 1000th degree.

In fear mode, your body is activated in the fight or flight mode,

Your body tenses, your breathing is shallow, your heart palpitates, your blood pressure is elevated, your hands and body sweat.

Not a good place to dwell.

Unfortunately, your brain cannot detect the difference between your imagination and reality, so the person in the grip of fear cannot tell the difference. They cannot tell that it is false evidence appearing real.

How to Overcome Fear with positive energy

Today I want to teach you how to use, positive energy, to clear the negative energies, of, fear. But first I want to review one of the Spiritual Laws of the Universe. The Law of Sowing and Reaping.

We all know of the physical laws like Gravity.

Some laws are physical and some are Spiritual and quantum.

Understanding the spiritual Law of Sowing and reaping can change your world.

Understanding that whatever you create it in the spiritual world of your thoughts will manifest in the physical world.

Put another way, that means whatever you plant in the fertile soil of your mind you will manifest in your physical world.

Just like planting an apple tree

Except that in the spiritual world

The soil is your mind

The seeds are your thoughts

The water are your actions

And The sun is your feelings

How to overcome fear, If you allow fear to dwell in your heart and mind every day you will manifest an apple orchard in your reality.

Energy flows where attention goes

Whatever you focus on expands

Everything is energy and all energy attracts similar energies.

You can’t put out negative energy and expect positive results.

You can’t plant apple trees and expect oranges.

Likewise, you can’t focus on what you fear and produce a successful result.

If you are constantly thinking of the things you, fear, you are planting a seed and based in the universal law of reaping and sowing, it must germinate.

The mind or consciousness is connected to reality.

Think of something strong enough or long enough to and it will eventually manifest in your reality.

These are six words you must stamp on your mind

“You become what you think about”

When you realize that your mind is a garden you will begin to plant only the things you desire.

Exercise: write down something that is opposite of what you fear and start giving it the same attention you have been giving your fear. Since light conquers darkness, it will eventually have your fear for lunch!

How to overcome with daily affirmations

Imagine you having fun traveling the world in crystal clear clarity.

Say, daily affirmations, that compliments your desire.

Visual your goal so much than sometimes you are not sure what is imagined and what is reality; the same way that you let fear take you out of reality.

Don’t get disappointed if it takes time to perfect this. Remember that positive things take time to manifest.

How to overcome fear, by pulling up the weeds when they sprout up; negative thoughts of failure will sprout up.

So, every morning find the weeds and dig them up.

Remember a successful gardener will always cultivate his land.

Cultivate your mind for success.

Life is energy, whatever you put out, is returned to you.

The mind does not care what seeds you plant, it will always return what you plant.

You can plant wealth or you can plant poverty.

You can plant, fear, or you can plant happiness.

Link: http://srisriravishankar.org/

How to overcome fear with mindfulness

Here is an excerpt from the book: The Wise Heart: A Guide to the Universal Teachings of Buddhist Psychology:

The, Buddha, faced plenty of his own, fear, and terror of imminent death. This is a passage from the, Buddha’s, early writings that Jack Kornfield, a teacher who helped introduce Buddhist mindfulness practice to the West, quotes in his book.

How would it be if in the dark of the month, with no moon, I were to enter the most strange and frightening places, near tombs and in the thick of the forest, that I might come to understand fear and terror. And doing so, a wild animal would approach or the wind rustle the leaves and I would think, “Perhaps the fear and terror now comes.” And being resolved to dispel the hold of that fear and terror, I remained in whatever posture it arose, sitting or standing, walking or lying down. I did not change until I had faced that fear and terror in that very posture, until I was free of its hold upon me … And having this thought, I did so. By facing the fear and terror I became free.

Read the full article here:

http://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2016/11/18/13579842/ancient-buddhist-strategy-overcoming-paralyzing-fear

Fear – False objects appearing real, as per the about passage, can be released by standing your ground. Our instinctive reaction to fear is to turn and run because as humans we are hard wired to run from pain and towards pleasure.

But, as the Buddha teaches in the passage above if you stand and have the courage to not move, you become free of fear and realize that your imagination is always worse than the reality.

A personal story on how I overcame fear.

When I first came to the United States of America, I came as a business owner. I did not have any of the benefits of a permanent resident. As my business was building, I decided to earn money as a sales person selling vacations. I was not authorized to work in the US, so I became very fearful of being found out and being deported. Every night I would dream that the immigration officials would come to my house and take me away in handcuffs. Sometimes I would dream that they would throw me in the back of the trunk.

One day, my pastor preached a sermon on, fear. He said that God promises to carry your burdens, so give them to God. He said when you give your fears and heavy loads to God, you can’t worry or take them back because that would mean that you don’t have faith in God’s promise to carry them.

He asked the congregation to write our, fears, and heavy burdens on a piece of paper and ceremoniously throw them at the alter giving them to God. I wrote my fear of being deported on a piece of paper and threw in on the alter. In doing so, I became free because I gave it away to someone else, God.

The good news is that I no longer was afraid of anything. Every time something came up that would potentially me fearful, I would face it and know that it will work out for my good. I stood on the scripture “I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you.”

Wisdom by http://www.wisdom.srisriravishankar.org/

How to overcome fear with the energy of joy

Now in order to transform the, energy of fear into the energy of joy, I want to share with you a short meditation practice.

Sit quietly in a chair; be comfortable. Place feet flat on the floor, hands clasped in your lap. Close your eyes. Be present. Focus on your breathing, feel your belly rise and fall under your clasped hands.

Breathe in for a count of 4 and breathe out for account of 6. Thus, slowing down your rhythmic cycles. Be mindful of the air as it passes through your nostrils down your esophagus and into your abdomen. If your mind wanders off bring it back gently to your breathe. Your mind can only concentrate on one thing at a time. Concentrating on your breathe bypasses your mind. Once you slow your cycles and quiet your mind, you are now in the receptive mode to change your programming.

Think briefly about something you, fear. Today we will use as our example the, fear of flying. Today we are going to use our imagination to replicate the experience of flying while you are sitting comfortably and safely in your chair.

How to Over Fear visualization exercise

Let’s begin. visualize you are at the airport with your loved ones, your husband and 2 children. You are on your way to Venice, Italy. You chose Venice because you wanted a romantic vacation with your husband. You can’t wait to ride on the gondolas and be serenaded with live music, going to the opera and have the experience of taking a water taxi everywhere.

You are excited. This energy is positive. You let this feeling of euphoria wash over you, you feel your body tingle with this, positive energy. You feel good! Now you are boarding the plane, you are starting to feel a little anxious. You board the plane and find your seat, you buckle yourself in.

The pilot announces that your flight time is 6 hours and that he will be flying at a cruising altitude of 35,000 feet. He advises you to give your attention the flight attendant and pay attention to the safety information. You notice your exits. You listen to what to do in the event of a water landing.

Your mind is going nuts with, fear, your heart starts to palpitate rapidly, you start to sweat. Now the airplane is taxing down the runway at full speed then it lifts off the ground. You squeeze your husband hand, you are hardly breathing, your whole body is tight. The plane is climbing it shakes a little you are so scared the sweat starts dripping from your forehead.

The plane reaches cruising altitude, the pilot turns off the fasten seat belt sign and people start moving about the plane. You calm down a little, but still aware of every movement of the plane. The flight attendants come around and offer beverages. You ask for a glass of wine. You are feeling calmer. The flight is uneventful. After what seems like an eternity the pilot announces that in 30 minutes he will be starting his descent into Venice.

Your, fear, returns, the plane shakes a little as it descends and you are once again in the grip of fear. The plane touches down and speeds down the runway braking speed. Your body is tight, your breathing shallow. Then it is all over. You faced your fear and came out on the other side! You exit the plane and you are in Venice.

I want you now to realize that you have taken your first flight in your mind. I want you to realize that fear is false evidence appearing real. I want you to realize that once you face your fear, like a bully, it backs down, I want you to realize that the energy of fear is keeping you stuck,

I want you to realize that whatever your, fear, just like we took a ride on an airplane and came out alive on the other side that is how all fear works. It has no real power over you. The only thing that is holding you back from doing the things you want to do is all in your mind. So, how to overcome fear, is to clear your mind. Do a dress rehearsal in the mind and then do it in the physical.

The first step is to overcome fear is to face the fear.

The second step in, how to overcome fear, is to clear it from the place it is planted in your mind. Take a moment now to ask your higher self where the, fear of flying, came from. When was the, fear, planted?

When you get the answer, you may think to yourself boy that was silly or you may have a legitimate reason to have a, fear of flying. Someone you know could have died in a plane crash or you yourself could have been in a plane emergency landing. The thing to remember is that you know that every time you drive on the highway you could die and you are aware of thousands of people who have died in car accidents; yet few people have a fear of driving in a car. So, consciousness is the second step.

The third step in, how to overcome fear, is to clear that energy by replacing it with, positive energy. We are going to use the, positive energy, of gratitude. Sit comfortably again. Imagine a bright light entering the crown of your head moving down through your check, down your throat, to your chest, down your abdomen through your feet. Feel this light fill all your energy centers as you become fully relaxed.

Now expand this energy out from your chest past the room, past your city, past your country, past the clouds, past the sun, past the planet into the stratosphere. You are now floating in cyberspace if you can bring your fear to mind in this space, do so now. Then replace that feeling of fear with the feeling of gratitude.

Gratitude, that you are alive, gratitude, that you are in sound mind, that you have a place to sleep and food to eat. Gratitude, that you are wealthier than 95% of the people in the world and you have the resources to travel to exotic destinations. Gratitude, that you will not let fear rob you of joy. Now set the intention to fly to the first place on your bucket list within the year.

I would love to hear your comments on what your, fears, are, and if you achieved a success result of transferring it with these exercises. Please share this podcast with friends and family and remember to subscribe and post a review. Transform your Mind podcast is giving away a Free Checklist you can do every morning to replace your fears with, positive affirmations.

Transform your mind iTunes podcast

To receive please subscribe, rate and review this podcast then send me an email to info@myhelps.us with the subject line iTunes review.

Until next time Namaste

Life Coaching, life coaching blog, Personal Development, Spiritual Fulfillment

Seven Levels of Spiritual Awakening

April 7, 2021 Myrna Morris Young

We are both the source and the recipients of the gifts of the Universe and God.

Spiritual awakening,  is a natural process similar to waking up in the morning and opening your eyes to the light. Your light is personal to you 
expressing your inner vision.

Visions come true by merging your inner and outer life.
We all have wishes and dreams to fulfill. For, spiritual awakening, to be valid, it must be useful in bringing fulfillment.

There are seven levels of Spiritual Awakening.

When you are fully connected to the light of being which is the light of the self, your light shines beyond all things on earth, beyond the highest heavens. This is the light that shines within you!

1: Spiritual Awakening - The level of Pure Potential

Spiritual awakening, is our essential state, pure consciousness. Pure consciousness is pure potential. It is the field of all possibilities and infinite creativity. When you discover your essential nature and know who you really are, in that knowing
itself is the ability to fulfill any dream you have; because you are the eternal possibility, the immeasurable potentiality of all that was, is and will be! One way to access this field is through the daily practice of silence, meditation and Life Coaching.

2: Spiritual Awakening - Fulfillment from Giving

When we are, spiritual awakening, our body, mind and the Universe are in constant and dynamic change. Stopping the circulation of energy is like stopping the flow of blood. Whenever blood stops flowing, it begins to clot, to stagnate. That is why you must give and receive in order to keep wealth, affluence, love, respect ...or anything you
want...Circulating in your life.

I practice not only giving to God, but giving something to everyone I meet. It could be a smile, a compliment or a prayer. The most powerful forms of giving are the non-material. The gifts of caring, attention, affection, appreciation and love are some of the most precious gifts you can give or receive.

3: Spiritual Awakening - Fulfillment from Sowing and Reaping

During, spiritual awakening, we are aware of our actions. Everyone has heard the expression "whatever you sow, you shall reap". It is obvious that if we want to create happiness in our lives, we must learn to sow the seeds that will grow Happiness. Therefore, we must life consciously, making good choices. Whether you like it or not, everything that is happening to you at
this moment is a direct result of the choices you've made in the past.

You cannot alter the past, but you can make the choice to design your future. Start now with the help of a Spiritual Life Coach. The more you bring your choices into the level of your conscious awareness, the more you will make those choices which are spontaneously correct for both you and those around you. This is, spiritual awakening.

4: Spiritual Awakening - Fulfillment from Love

When you seek money and power for the sake of the ego, you spend energy chasing the illusion of happiness from material things, instead of enjoying the happiness of the moment. On the other hand, when your actions are motivated by love, your energy multiplies and accumulates and the surplus can be channeled to
create anything you want; including unlimited wealth.

5: Fulfillment from The Desires of your Heart

The whole Universe, in its essential mature, is the movement of energy and information called, spiritual awakening. You can consistently change the energy and information of your own Quantum mechanical body and therefore influence the energy and informational content of your extended body...your environment, your world... and cause things to happen. In other words "You become what you think about, most of the time". The quality of your intention on the object of your attention will orchestrate an infinity of space-time events to bring about the outcome intended. So, never, never give
up on your dreams.

6: Fulfillment from Detachment

Detachment, is a part of, spiritual awakening. Detachment, does not mean you give up the intention to create your desire. Instead, you give up your attachment to the result. The moment you relinquish your attachment to the result and just believe that it will be yours; you will have that which you desire. Detachment is based on the unquestioning belief in the power of God.

Detachment, is also synonymous with wealth consciousness, because with, detachment, there is freedom to create. True wealth consciousness is the ability to have anything you want, anytime you want and with little effort. Start creating your wealth. Call for a free consultation.

7: Spiritual Awakening - Fulfillment from being on Purpose

We have taken manifestation in physical form to fulfill a purpose. There is something that you can do better than anyone else in this whole world. There are also unique needs. When these needs are matched with creative expression of talent, there is a spark that creates affluence. Expressing your talents to fulfill needs creates unlimited wealth and abundance.

It is said that "who you seek, is seeking you" my talent is to HELP you in discovering your purpose and fulfilling your destiny by creating awareness, discovering your essential nature, making conscious choices and co-creating for you and your loved ones. So let's connect and create wealth and abundance.
Call for a free consultation today.

Myrna Morris Young
Spiritual Life and Executive Coach
email: info@myhelps.us

Life Coaching, Love and Religion, Personal Development, Spiritual Fulfillment, Spiritual Life Coaching

Does God Answer prayer?

April 7, 2021 Myrna Morris Young

Faith is the language to get your Prayer answered

The bible teaches that for God to answer, prayer, you must first believe and have faith that God is first able and willing to give you the desires of your heart; but there are ways to improve the chances that God will answer your, prayer. A, prayer is a special kind of intention.

Therefore, the rules that apply to the, Power of intention, which are rules about consciousness, apply. Your prayer will be answered, or not, depending on events happening out of sight – but not out of mind. The mind furnishes the mechanics of making any intention come true. An intention or prayer request, sent to God needs faith to rocket it to the heavens. An intention to graduate at the top of your class or to marry the man of your dreams takes focus, diligence and action. The bible also teaches “Faith Without Works Is Dead”.

– “What does it profit, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can faith save him?”

What makes any intention or prayer come true?

Three vital elements are at work in prayer:

1. How deep into the mind is the intention coming from- how badly do you want it?

2. How steady is your focus- do you think about it every day?

3. How fluid is your intention – are you attached to the outcome?

When you perfect these three things, the power of intention becomes real and powerful.

1: Depth of awareness – “Like a river that runs fast on the surface but much more slowly near the bottom, the mind is conceived of as both active and still.” Deepak Chopra

The stillness is present, for example, in the space between thoughts. When you are accustomed to experiencing your mind only through activity (i.e., sensations, images, feelings, and thoughts), the silent source of the mind has been missed. The whole point of Eastern meditation practices is to reacquaint a person with this source. The more often you dive into your silent mind, the deeper your intentions are coming from when you aren’t meditating. The bible also teaches that you can find God in the stillness. …

“Then a spirit passed by my face; The hair of my flesh bristled up. It stood still, but I could not discern its appearance; A form was before my eyes; There was silence, then I heard a voice: ‘Can mankind be just before God? Can a man be pure before his Maker?’…” Job 4:15 – 17

Some ways to access this quiet source are: your, prayer closet, meditation, calm, peaceful surroundings, minimal mental agitation, stress free living, self-acceptance and self-awareness.

2: Steady mental focus – Calling up an intention is natural to everyone’s mind. The key is that the intention be one-pointed, that is, your desire doesn’t conflict with other desires or get dissipated in mental restlessness. We’ve all experienced moments of knowing exactly what we want and never losing focus as long as our desire holds our attention.

Does God Answer Prayer?

Does God answer, prayer? Absolutely, once we are clear and specific about what we ask for, act purposefully, not lose sight of the goal, have confidence and, faith, and do the works diligently; then we attract our intentions into our experience. When we tap into the supernatural, all power of God and the Holy Spirit, then we make quantum leaps to achieving our desires and intentions.

What hurts Intentions? Multitasking, mental confusion, conflicted desires, lack of self-knowledge, fantasy and daydreaming, short attention span, a craving to escape the self with drugs or alcohol and finally a lack of belief in God and in yourself.

3: Fluid awareness – Do you have an open mind that can adapt to any response from the world? Do you have a mind that is committed to the destination but allows God to map out the route and the stops along the way to the destination? No better example exists than playing a video game, where the player is fiercely intent of scoring points but must be open to every surprising, unexpected event in order to reach a high score. In everyday life, a desire is focused at its inception; but you should let your attachment to it go, and await whatever response comes your way.

In these three elements, as you can see, lies a lifetime of potentiality unfolding into actuality. Every thought has the power of intention behind it.

Every, prayer, can be answered if you empower it with, faith, believe and action. The bible tells us of the paralyzed man who had faith and belief that Jesus can heal him; but Jesus was in a crowded place and he could not get in through the door so he had his helpers knock a hole in the roof of the building and let him down in front of Jesus. Jesus told him immediately that his “sins were forgiven” and he was healed.

“Some men came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them. 4 Since they could not get him to Jesus because of the crowd, they made an opening in the roof above Jesus by digging through it and then lowered the mat the man was lying on. 5 When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralyzed man, “Son, your sins are forgiven.” – Mark 2:3-5

God not only answers, prayers, but you can access the Universal power of intention and begin co-creating your future. The only issue is how far you are willing to go to cooperate with this ability, to unearth its possibilities, and improve the quality of your life.

Myrna Morris Young, Spiritual Life and Executive Coach

President and CEO of Myhelps Inc.

Phone: 954-999-6125

Email:myrna@myhelps.us

Web: http://www.myhelps.us

Author: “Becoming Conscious, My Awakening”

Executive Coaching, Leadership Coaching, Life Coaching, Personal Development, Spiritual Fulfillment, Spiritual Life Coaching

The Power of Intention: Seven Ways To Access This Energy

April 7, 2021 Myrna Morris Young

Discover who you are and live your life on purpose! ~~~Dolly Parton

The, power of Intention, is defined as a strong purpose or aim to fulfill your dreams. This power is an invisible force of energy in the Universe. We access this force when we become inspired; dormant forces come alive in us and propel us towards our goals. That force is called the, Power of Intention.

Don’t wait to fall through a hole to experience a new world, be deliberate about your life; intentionally create the world you want to live and play in.

We are all born with the power of intention

Every baby is born with a purpose, every baby is pure, intention. Even before the Seed is matched with the Egg; the, Power of Intention, sets in motion what you will physically look like at your birth.

Your height, your bone structure, the color of your eyes and your non-physical attributes are also predetermined; ie your personality, how you will handle stress and your emotional IQ etc. Babies are born with the potential to walk, speak, read, and do mathematics. Nothing is left to chance. It’s possible to locate which areas of the brain that will eventually produce these abilities, but until then, they exist as pure potentials and intentions.

” I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations” ~~~Jeremiah 1:5

Here are 3 ways to access the energy field of Intention

The spoken word – is a powerful tool, by levering our voice we expand our dreams from internal thoughts to external possibilities. So speak freely of your dreams and visions. By verbalizing your thoughts out loud you are empowering your dreams to the universe. You are entering the field of all possibilities. This is the predominant reason that coaching works. Inside the coaching conversation, you are speaking your goals and vision, sometimes for the first time.

Controlling your Thoughts – When you are aware of the company you keep in your head, you take back control of your life by being present in the present moment. The friends in your head in the form of your thoughts, determines where you end up in life. Just like when we were kids and our parents told us not to keep company with certain kids because they would be a bad influence; in the same way if we keep company with, negative thoughts, they become a bad influence.
Your parents did not know why but they knew that if you hung around bad kids then no good will come of you. In a similar way if you keep replaying, negative emotions, doubt, worry, insecurities, getting even, discontent, fear, blame in your head then no good will come of you. The first step is becoming conscious of your thoughts. Once you bring these thoughts from subconscious to consciousness, then you take back control.

Verbalize your vision – What you do and what you say are very important. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. When we declare our, intentions, to the Universe, we set the energy fields in motion. The bible teaches that words are carriers. Words carry the spirit of the person speaking. Spirit is the highest form of energy. To access the energy field of the, Power of Intention, we need to become aware of our energy levels.

There are five levels of energy:

1: The material world – it is energy slowed down so we can see form
2: The sound world – faster energy. We can sometimes feel sound vibrations.
3: The light world – when the high energy of light meets with the low energy of darkness; the darkness becomes light. In the same way when we keep our energy levels high, the low energy fields of doubt, depression, obstacles etc. cannot reach us because our light converts the low energy fields of negative emotions.
4: Our thoughts – the energy of our thoughts are higher than light and sound. Every thought we have can be calculated to see if it has the positive energy to access the power of intention or the negative energy of doubt that impedes our forward movement and progress.
5: The energy of spirit – The highest level of energy is that of spirit. Spirit is the energy force of Creation. Kindness, Beauty, Love, Expansion are also forms of spirit energy.

Make raising your energy levels a priority in life. Low energy is an attractor pattern. If you practice raising your energy then you will not attract low energy forms like depression, blame, loneliness, shame, anxiety etc.

Seven ways to raise your energy levels to access the Power of Intention:

Becoming conscious of your thoughts.
Make meditation a regular practice. Meditation allows us to make conscious connection with our source. It also allows us to make conscious connection with our emotions, so that we develop discipline.
Become conscious of the foods we eat. Processed foods lower our energy, while fruits, vegetables and greens raise our energy levels. Drugs and alcohol including prescription drugs also lowers your energy levels. Retreat from drugs and alcohol even prescription drugs.
Becoming conscious of the music you listen to. Rock and Heavy metal music lowers your energy levels, while soft music about love, and classical music raises your energy levels.
Becoming aware of the energy in your home. Feng Shui is the art of choosing the right furnishings and accessories then arranging these furnishings to increase the positive energy in your home. Accessories can include paintings or photography. Photographs of your loved ones smiling and laughing in happier times, photographs expressing love or showcasing nature also raise your energy levels. You should also become conscious of the energy from relationships in your home. Tension and strife in your home not only lowers your energy levels; but it debilitates you. We cannot excel in any area in life, if we are not happy at home.
Immerse yourself in nature- experiencing the beauty of nature is a purely spiritual experience. The energy of spirit is the highest level attainable.
Commit to helping people in need. Acts of kindness expecting nothing in return raises your energy levels because kindness, compassion and service are spiritual experiences and the highest of the energy states. The beauty of kindness and giving expecting nothing in return is that you get that energy back in spades. The Bible teaches that in giving the tithe to God,” the windows of Heaven are opened and blessings pour out that you wouldn’t have room to receive.” In a similar fashion, when you give of yourself to the world, expecting nothing in return, the windows of Heaven open up and you get back more than you ever gave.

Myrna Morris Young, Life and Executive Coach

President and CEO of Myhelps Inc.

Phone: 954-999-6125

Email:myrna@myhelps.us

Web: http://www.myhelps.us

Author: “Becoming Conscious, My Awakening”

Executive Coaching, Leadership Coaching, Life Coaching, Personal Development, Spiritual Fulfillment, Spiritual Life Coaching

7 reasons Meditation Can Help increase Business Revenue

April 6, 2021 Myrna Morris Young 2 Comments

Meditation, is not just for Buddhists and monks: meditation unlocks the power you have within to take your business to the top.

Introduction Meditation for your business

When you, meditate, you strengthen your intuition, spirituality, awareness, and most importantly, your own sense of self. As many successful entrepreneurs know, reduced stress is the foundation to creating the business and lifestyle you want. If you are not removing your limiting beliefs and constantly working on your vision, you are limiting your own growth and the growth of your company. You are the lid!

As a leader or an Entrepreneur there is no better way to overcome obstacles, rise to the top or be creative with out first quieting the noise in your head. When you become still you tap into your creative power by connecting to your source. During, meditation, you experience that peace that surpasses all understanding that the bible talks about.

When you forget about all the things you have to do and just focus on the life inside you by witnessing your breathing, you move closer to becoming conscious and understand your purpose. Being quiet and still allows you to listen to instructions from the higher power who guides you. It is said that it is easier to guide a horse in the direction it is running in; so when you fall into line with what God wants you to do for his Kingdom then your business and your life become less of a struggle.

Reasons meditation works

The reasons we, meditate , are as varied as the many ways there are to meditate. In the West, most people are drawn to, meditation, to quiet the internal chatter of the brain and to reduce stress. Meditation, is indeed, a very effective stress reducer, but its benefits—sometimes mysteriously hidden—are far more bountiful. The actual act of meditation can be as simple as sitting quietly and focusing on your breath while repeating silently a mantra—a word or phrase.

There are countless traditions and no singular “correct” way to practice, meditation. Find a practice that you like and stick with it for a while. Notice how you feel as you go about your days. If you find that you have more patience, feel grounded and better able to respond to stressful situations, and are more in touch with your intuition or “gut feelings,” you are enjoying the many benefits of meditation.

I, meditate, by finding a quiet place in the morning as I drink my coffee. I listen to a, guided meditation, tape on topics such as “activating consciousness”, visionary me meditation, “the law of attraction” etc. as I listen I clear my mind by mentally repeating a centering thought and witnessing my breathing.

At the end of my, meditation, I am relaxed, totally open and creative. I usually write some deep insights after my, meditation, sessions and I get answers from God and the Universe to questions I ask. This is the perfect way to become a visionary and an innovative leader.

1: Meditation is good for our Physical Bodies

Scientists gathering data on, meditation, have found that a consistent practice of, meditation, not only boosts the mind, but it also bolsters the body. Studies shows that, meditation, can help reverse heart disease, reduce pain, and support the immune system, better enabling it to fight disease.

The mind-body connection between stress and disease is abundantly apparent as science is finding that meditation can lower production of the stress hormone cortisol. This means meditators are better able to adapt to stress in their lives.

2: Meditation is good for Our Relationships

Paradoxically, while, meditation, helps us tune in and turn inward to our true essence, it also helps us detach from our own egos to connect with others in more meaningful ways. Couples counselors have found when they assign their clients meditation, the couples become less angry, more self-reflective, and more loving.

When we become aware of—and honor—our interconnection with other beings, we are able to recast our perspectives, see our worries in a different light, and embrace gratitude, which is the heart’s memory. The bible teaches that we can’t change others only ourselves and when we, meditate, we tune into who we really are.

Our ancestral legacy is a brain that is primed to focus on negative experiences and has a tendency to get stuck in conditioned patterns of thinking, returning again and again to thoughts of anxiety, depression, and limitation. So in our relationships we tend to focus on what we do not have instead of what we do have.

As you, meditate, on a regular basis, you develop what is known as “witnessing awareness”—the ability to calmly and objectively observe a situation, notice when you are being triggered, and consciously choose how you want to respond. The ability to be present and aware is extremely valuable in every relationship.

3: Meditation helps prolong our lives

When you, meditate, you strengthen your intuition, awareness, and most importantly, your own sense of self. Yogis and doctors both agree: meditating—even just a few minutes of deep breathing—relaxes the brain, reduces anxiety, and decreases depression. We say we can’t afford the time to meditate, but the truth is we can’t afford not to.

When we tell ourselves we don’t have time to exercise, or meditate, then we will make time for sickness and depression. During most of our waking lives, our minds are engaged in a continuous internal dialogue in which the meaning and emotional associations of one thought triggers the next.

We hear a snippet of music and suddenly we’re thinking about the first time we heard that song with an old boyfriend or girlfriend and how that relationship ended. If we’re still holding emotional pain over that ending, those feelings may bubble up and then our mind may veer into criticism, self-pity, or worries about the future.

Meditation, is one of the best tools we have to counter the brain’s negativity bias, release accumulated stress, foster positive experiences and intentions, and enjoy the peace of present moment awareness. A large body of research has established that having a regular, meditation, practice produces tangible benefits for mental and physical health, including:

Benefits of Meditation

Decreased blood pressure and hypertension
Lowered cholesterol levels
Reduced production of “stress hormones,” including cortisol and adrenaline
More efficient oxygen use by the body
Increased production of the anti-aging hormone DHEA
Improved immune function
Decreased anxiety, and insomnia

4: Meditation Reduces Stress and Burnout

What role is more stressful than the role of a Leader? None, as a Leader you are responsible for the lives of your employees, families, and your commitment to your community? Chronic, unmanaged stress can make you sick and accelerate aging. As many scientific studies have found, prolonged stress can contribute to high blood pressure, heart disease, stomach ulcers, autoimmune diseases, anxiety, cancer, insomnia, chronic fatigue, obesity, depression, and accelerated aging.

In meditation, your body releases stress and reverses the effects of the flight-or-fight response—that ancient instinct we all have to either run from perceived danger or take it on in battle. Intended as a short-term protection mechanism, fight or flight causes our body to speed up our heart rate, increase our blood sugar, suppress our immune system, reduce insulin production, pump out stress hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol, and reduce the blood supply to our digestive organs.

All of these reactions happen so that our body can focus on either running away as fast as it can—or staying to fight. Although few people reading this face daily threats to their bodily existence, many live in a prolonged state of fight or flight, generating stress in response to bad traffic, criticism from a spouse, or a disagreement.

Regular, meditation, dissipates accumulated stress and cultivates a state of restful alertness. There are many compelling studies showing the power of meditation to relieve stress and promote inner calm. For example, a 2011 study published in the Evidence-Based Complementary and Alternative Medicine Journal found that full-time workers who spent a few hours each week practicing mindfulness meditation reported a significant decrease in job stress, anxiety, and depressed mood.

The reason, meditation, is so popular amongst successful individuals is it helps release stress, lets go of excess thoughts and expand awareness. As you dive deeper into your, meditation, you see people, events and circumstances as they really are, not as they are perceived to be. It allows you to have an internal Locus of control.

That means that you don’t react to external stimuli but are proactive with action plans and goals. It also means that as challenges arise in your, business, you will not get overwhelmed; but face those challenges calmly and efficiently. As an Entrepreneur Leader, meditation, allows you to turn your failures into successes.

5: Meditation Enhances Your Concentration, Memory, and Ability to Learn

As researchers have found, meditation, can help you tap into your brain’s deepest potential to focus, learn, and adapt. While scientists used to believe that beyond a certain age, the brain couldn’t change or grow, we now know that the brain has a quality known as plasticity, enabling it to grow new neurons and transform throughout our lives.

Meditation, is a powerful tool for awakening new neural connections and even transforming regions of the brain. A recent study led by Harvard University and Massachusetts General Hospital found that after only eight weeks of, meditation, participants experienced beneficial growth in the brain areas associated with memory, learning, empathy, self-awareness, and stress regulation. In addition, the meditators reported decreased feelings of anxiety and greater feelings of calm. This study adds to the expanding body of research about the brain’s amazing plasticity and ability to change habitual stress patterns.

Many other studies provide evidence for the value of, meditation, in improving the ability to stay focused in world filled with increasing distractions and demands on our attention. For example, research conducted by the UCLA Mindful Awareness Center showed that teenagers and adults with ADHD who practiced various forms of meditation for just eight weeks improved their ability to concentrate on tasks, even when attempts were made to distract them. In the world of the Entrepreneur Leader, the ability to focus when you are pulled in so many different directions is extremely important to your success.

6: Meditation Improves Your Creativity and Problem-Solving Skills

We each have an estimated 60,000 to 80,000 thoughts a day—unfortunately, many of them are the same thoughts we had yesterday, last week, and last year. The mind tends to get stuck in repetitive thought loops that squeeze out the possibility for new ideas and inspiration.

Meditation, is a powerful practice for going beyond habitual, conditioned thought patterns into a state of expanded awareness. We connect to what is known as the field of infinite possibilities or pure potentiality, and we open to new insights, intuition, and ideas. And as we meditate and focus on our breathing, we stop this continuous cycle.

7: Meditation Decreases Anxiety, and Insomnia

The emotional effects of sitting quietly and going within are profound. The deep state of rest produced by, meditation, triggers the brain to release neurotransmitters, including dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphins. Each of these naturally occurring brain chemicals has been linked to different aspects of happiness:

Dopamine plays a key role in the brain’s ability to experience pleasure, feel rewarded, and maintain focus. Serotonin has a calming effect. It eases tension and helps us feel less stressed and more relaxed and focused. Low levels of this neurotransmitter have been linked to migraines, anxiety, bipolar disorder, apathy, feelings of worthlessness, fatigue, and insomnia.

Oxytocin (the same chemical whose levels rise during sexual arousal and breastfeeding), is a pleasure hormone. It creates feelings of calm, contentment, and security, while reducing fear and anxiety. Endorphins are most commonly known as the chemicals that create the exhilaration commonly labeled “the runner’s high.” These neurotransmitters play many roles related to well being, including decreasing feelings of pain and reducing the side effects of stress.

Myrna Morris Young, Certified Professional Coach

President and CEO of Myhelps Inc.

Phone: 954-999-6125

Email:myrna@myhelps.us

Web: http://www.myhelps.us

Author: “Becoming Conscious, My Awakening“

Dressing for Success, Entrepreneur, Executive Coaching, improving sales, Leadership Coaching, Life Coaching, LinkedIn profile

What Are They Biting On? 5 Ways To Improve Your Bait

April 6, 2021 Myrna Morris Young

What are your clients biting on? What is your bait

I recently watched the movie “A River runs through it”. I should confess that anything with Brad Pitt I watch with a big smile on my face! Anyway, in the movie Brad and his brother were, fishing, in this river. Brad’s brother was catching a whole lot of fish and Brad had not caught one. After some time of being a spectator in this fishing expedition, he shouted to his brother, “What are they biting on?” His brother shouted back, “Pimento Bugs”. Strangest, bait, I ever saw, these bugs had wings! But sure enough, when Brad changed his, bait, he caught the biggest fish ever!

In sales, you are the, Bait!

Everything you heard is true! People buy from people they like, people they feel a connection to or with people who are like them!

Here are 5 Ways you can Improve your Bait:

No tee-shirts and tattoos

1: Your Attire can be your, bait

Again, I will start with an Old Cliché “You never get a second chance to make a first impression.” If you are going for an interview or meeting with a customer for the first time; look the part, and that is your best, bait.
I went for an interview once at Apple retail Store and I was very confused. Apple, Google and Facebook CEO’s have all made famous the tea shirt and running shoes mode of dress. So I was not sure how to dress; but I decided on a suit. No tee-shirt and runners for me! Better to be overdressed than not get a job because you showed up in tea shirt and tennis shoes. In the movie “the Pursuit of Happyness”, Will Smith was sleeping in bathrooms and homeless; but he made sure he had one suit that always looked good. That is all you need, one good outfit. It is suggested that for the man the color should be blue, black or grey for a suit. For the ladies a pant suit or an A-line dress works wonders.

2: Your Profile is bait

Your profile picture is what everyone sees. Just a picture of your head and face, and they from that they form a judgement, whether consciously or not. In a recent LinkedIn training class, the presenter told a story about how he was about to hire someone for a service, then he noticed that their picture was dark and blurred. He said he decided not do business with them. He formed a judgement that if they could not spend $50 to get a good profile picture, then they could not be successful. You might say that he was too judgmental; but you never know what is costing you business. It is best to button it up.
I personally would never connect with anyone who didn’t have a profile picture because I made the judgement that they were either not active or not serious. Now I connect because I can offer my consulting services because they need Help! Spend the money to get a professional profile picture and it will pay dividends.

3: The entire package is your Bait

I could never understand the “shoe shine” concept. Why did men favor going to get their shoes professionally shined until it became a mirror and they could see their faces in their shoes?
Now I understand, those men understood the value of “the entire package”. You can’t show up in an expensive suit, and your shoes are not shined! You can’t show up in an expensive suit and your hair looks like a hippie; you can’t show up in an expensive suit and your car looks like you bought it from the scrapyard. People form the wrong impression and then you have to work doubly hard for them to hear what is “coming out of your mouth”.

For men, pay attention to the suit, shirt, tie, hair style, shoes.

For women, pay attention to your dress, your hair, your shoes and your pocket book! Yes, people now pay attention to what handbag you are putting your lipstick into!

4: Your Business card, your Website, and your Printed Materials

If you want to convey success, then you have to look the part.

Has anyone ever handed you a business card that was printed at home on cheap paper? What was your reaction? Did you want to run out and purchase their product? I am sure you didn’t. Or you ask someone who has a service you are interested in for a business card, and they tell you they don’t have one.
I should even add a pen to this scenario. In the movie “the Pursuit of Happyness”, there is a scene in which a salesperson bent over backwards to get a contract with Will Smith to produce his story. He called him several times, he made him an irresistible offer, he tracked him down at the airport and when Will was about to sign the contract and he asked him for a pen, he did not have one! Will cancelled the deal. He felt that a salesperson should always have a business card and a pen if he is worth anything!

5: Your Speech makes or breaks you

I don’t know if you have noticed, but most of the leading roles for movies and television commercials are going to actors who sound English! It is like a “cool breeze” to listen to someone with a pleasant voice. You don’t have to have an English accent; but your volume should be right and your pace should be right. As a Toastmaster, when we are speaking, we are gonged when we add fillers to our speech. Fillers are so, umm, ahh, etc. if you are doing a presentation and you have too many fillers, your audience doesn’t regard you as a subject matter expert.

Your, Bait, is you! Once you make a good impression and the fish are biting; then you can get on with the business that you came to do, and that is to sell your product or service.

You want to catch some fish! So go, fishing.

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