Category Archives: Personal Development

healthy relationships, Life Coaching, mental health counseling, Mindset Transformation, minority women, Personal Development, podcast, transform your mind

How to Find your Soul Mate or Twin Flame

Are you a single woman hoping to, find your soul mate?  What about your, twin flame, who is your mirror, soul. Science says that when you meet your  Life partner, some thing magical happens. In this blog we look at what happens when two, souls, with constructive energies meet?

Listen to the full interview here:

In our last episode my co-host and I looked at what, single women, need to do to get their house ready for love, where to look for love and what to look for when you are starting over after divorce or death of a partner.

If you missed that episode you can download it here: https://myhelps.us/how-single-women-find-love/ or on iTunes ,iHeart radio or wherever you get your podcasts. 

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Today's episode of the Transform your Mind Radio Hour is sponsored by  Columbus Financial Coach.  Are you in a deep hole of “Financial Depression” with nowhere to turn for help? Constantly being harassed by collection agencies? Then visit Columbus Financial and success coach. www.columbusfinancialcoach.com

Introduction

 How to, Find your Soul mate,  the Science of Attraction

In the last Blog post, I shared how I met my husband on a train. I am going to use this personal story to illustrate what happens when two strangers or, souls, meet for the first time.

As you may remember from Chemistry class, every atom and molecule gives out and absorbs light. The human body is made up of 50 trillion cells composed of atoms and molecules. So we are massive bundles of energy giving off and absorbing light or energy all the time.

When two energies come together they become entangled, the first step to, find your soul mate, is constructive energy.

When two energies are in harmony, the result is called, constructive energy, because it increases in size.  That is why you should grow as a person when you are in the right relationship.

We call this, “good vibes” very important when you are hoping to, find your soul mate. 

How Chemistry plays in finding your Soul Mate

So let's look at what happened when I met my husband and our energies became constructive!

I walked onto a train and he was standing by the door. I looked fine, mini skirt, sunglasses, designer bag over my shoulder,  so I caught his attention. He caught my attention because he was the first black officer I had seen on the train.

On be known to me my second Chakra or energy center in charge of communication sent him a signal because he tells me he felt this warm feeling in his body. He had never felt that before. Let me put a pin here and explain.

Our bodies are made up of seven energy centers, called Chakras. Each of these energy centers are responsible for certain functions.  I know that my second Chakra located below my navel is my communication center and it is responsible for engaging a mate by sending out signals when it finds a compatible energy so you can, find your soul mate.

Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

Soul mate vs Twin flame

My husband could also be my, twin flame.  After 14 years of marriage, I do believe we are mirror souls. What Is A Twin Flame? Sometimes discussed in terms of a “mirror soul” or, soul connection, a, twin flame, is the other half of your, soul. It is theorized that a, soul, can split into two after ascending to a high frequency. Thereafter, the, soul, lands in two different bodies.

I must have also received something from my husband's energy center as well because my thoughts lingered on him. I was curious. That was all that it was for me at that time. Curiosity. I was not actively looking to, find a  soul mate.

But I have heard men say that the first time they saw their wife they knew that she was the one. There is such  a thing as love at first sight! Have you heard Steve Harvey tell his story of when he met his wife and, how he found his, soul mate?.  I don't think he was actively trying to, find your soul mate. But there she was. He was doing stand up comedy and she walked in late with her girlfriends, and he couldn’t stop staring at her.  In fact he couldn’t even continue his act.  He told her right then that she was going to be his wife! Believe in compatible energy, it is real.

Anyway, back to my story. Because our energies entangled and we both got, good vibes, we looked to further the communication.

The, Soul mate Connection, is Immediate

Another pin. That is why we shouldn't chase men.  if you guys have, constructive energy, or, good vibes, they will reach out. We are hard wired to mate. It is all happening without our conscious thought. Your soul is looking for it's, twin flame.

So my husband searched for me on the train every day until he found me. I noticed him sit behind me for a few mins while he got up the nerve to come talk to me. We talked for about 30 mins until I got off the train at my stop. I will confess that I was not impressed by the conversation. He cursed like a sailor. I think that men who curse in front of women have no respect; but when I got off the train my energy body told me that it had made a, soul connection.

I had this incredible feeling of euphoria!  My stomach was doing somersaults. I knew right then that we would have a relationship. I knew right then that I had found my, soul mate, This is how you, find your soulmate, you listen to your body.

Three months later he proposed we were married 8 months after. That was 13 years ago and we are still in love, compatible energies!

Soul mate Meaning

This is an example of the science of two, compatible energies, something we have no control over.  That is why you have heard people say we have no control over who we love. You can't pick your, soul mate. The science of attraction brings him or her to you.

Your, soul mate meaning,  two souls joining together to perfect each other.

On the other hand when your energy is not in sync with other, we get, bad vibes, not your, soul mate.  The energy cancels each other out and instead of feeling euphoria you feel depleted.

Energy is your most important reading as a single woman looking for a mate. Ever heard the saying that someone is like an anchor, you can’t thrive since you met them.  Pay attention that means that you are not expanding, you are contracting or stuck.

Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
Download on Spotify

Illustration  the Science of, Attraction, the bad vibe

Rhonda met this great guy at a bar. The guy was gorgeous, absolutely delicious. He pursued and seduced her and they started, dating. They had a great time together but something didn’t click. He was kinda, sorta vague on his explanation about everything.

It took about three months of, dating, this guy for Rhonda to discover that he was still living with his daughter’s mother and another 6 months to understand that theirs was an on and off relationship. He would never under any circumstances spend the night, saying that he did not want his daughter to wake up and he was not there.  This reminds me of Whitney Houston’s married relationship in Waiting to Exhale!

This is when Rhonda realized that a married man is a married man.  They can string you along forever. They can tell you anything.  She decided to breakup.  The breakup was mutual but she wasted at least 2 years on a relationship that was going nowhere when if she had paid attention to her, bad vibes,  she could have saved herself from heartache.

Reading energy is the most important data in the, dating, world.

Be careful of Psychopaths while looking to, find your  Soul Mate

Have you ever met a psychopath? Or been in a relationship with one? They are masters at reading energy.

We are all broadcasting a frequency of our most innermost thoughts. That is how a predator picks out his prey.

  • That is how a mugger chooses his victim.
  • Animals also know how to read this energy.  A lion picks his prey from a flock. He reads the vibration of the weakest prey.

I am sure everyone on the planet is aware on some level of the Art Kelly crimes against teenage girls and women. How do you think he chose his victims?  Women who would allow him to disrespect their bodies and lock them up in a room and  have to ask to go to the bathroom and ask to eat?  Some said that he didn't feed them for 3 days, yet they didn't leave. As one of his victims said in an interview.  If you were weak minded, he wants you. You could be a teenager or a 30 year old woman!

Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast

Download on Podbean

Science of, attraction,  reading vibrations when looking to, find your soul mate?

Synergistic relationships are based on both individuals being on the same wavelength, when they completely understand each other and don't try to limit the space they occupy in each other's lives.

I read an article that stated the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.  The examples used was if you train two Belgian horses together, the effect is multiplied: together, they can pull 32,000 pounds. Two horses, doing the work of four, even though it seems to defy physics. Often, in a positive relationship, you’ll find that synergy is already happening.

How can you increase that by finding harmony, in acknowledging individual strengths and how they work best together?  For example, I love to shop; but I don’t necessarily like to cook all the time.  My husband, will send me a list of all the items to pick up the grocery store and he will cook.  I then just have to do keep the kitchen tidy and get the family read to enjoy his great cooking.  It works for both of us.

In regards to signs women should look out for in predators, Robert Hare, one of the world’s foremost experts on, psychopathic behavior, believes that people need to know what to do in the event they find themselves involved or associated with a predatory psychopath.

Here are his tips on How to Avoid being targeted by a predator when trying to, find your soulmate:

  1. Be careful of props—the winning smile, the promises, the fast talk, and the gifts meant to deflect you from the manipulation and exploitation that may be occurring. Any of these characteristics can have enormous sleight-of-hand value, serving to distract you.”
  2. Anyone who seems too perfect is. Psychopaths hide their dark sides until they get their target person deeply involved. Too much flattery, feigned kindness, and cracks in grandiose stories should provide clues and put you on your guard. Make reasonable inquiries.
  3. Know yourself—or you might be vulnerable from your blind spots. Predators know how to find and use your triggers, so the more you realize what you tend to fall for, the more closely you can guard against it.

 

The second stage in the Science of Attraction, is Chemistry

I know you have heard this word thrown around all the time. For example the dating sites match people up by common interests; but they can't manufacture chemistry.

Let's get back to my husband for a minute.

I just shared all about the our first meeting and about us having good vibes but if we had no chemistry we would just become good friends.

Here are the Chemicals released  by love that is responsible for Chemistry:

  • Dopamine – Lights up your pleasure center. Your pleasure goes up when you are near or think about this person. Your  motivation goes up, Now you are thinking of that nice house and 2 kids! Your sadness goes down, if you were depressed, you are now happy.

I know you have heard the saying love is blind. It is true. Dopamine make you more attractive to your mate and since we are on this planet to procreate, your sexuality goes up! I am sure you have heard or have personal data that new lovers do it all the time!

  • The second chemical that is released in love is Oxytocin  – Oxytocin is responsible for trust. Your level of trust goes up, and your attachment goes up. This is probably why your girlfriends can’t figure why you are going out with a player;  but you don’t see it until your heart is crushed. The psychopath uses this one to his advantage.
  • Finally Serotonin is released. – This hormone is responsible for all the pain attached to love. Serotonin goes up and you become obsessed with your lover. Love is a chemical addiction!

Thank God I have only had one experience with an over abundance of this hormone.

I met one of my boyfriends at a club and it was an instant attraction. I fell hard.  I swooned when he called me baby the next day!

Less than 2 months after we met, we made plans to spend the New Year in Jamaica.  He left before Christmas but I wouldn’t leave my kids for Christmas so I made plans to meet him in Jamaica after Christmas.   It was the longest week in my entire life.  I literally looked at the clock the entire time.  I was an addict! I however did not, find my soulmate.

Arifah what can you lend to this conversation from a social worker perspective?

Wow, Myrna glad you spoke about the hormones.  I always talk to my clients about increasing their Oxytocin through touch, such as a hug, holding hands, a kiss.  Everyone has a sensitive area on the body that causes arousal when touched, whether sexual or just to feel good. It’s important in a relationship to know what your partner likes and does not, to give each other compliments and share tips on how increase synergy between each other.  It’s important to always reminisce on moments, like when you first met, knew you were in love and what you admire about one another now.  All of this, helps build connection.

In general the most salient characteristics for chemistry between two people are mutual interest (reciprocal candor, reasonableness, intimacy,

Similarity, and physical attraction.

 

Here are some questions from my Life Coach group on Facebook on How to, Find your Soul mate?

Remember you have an open invitation to join this group to get answers from the group on any of your struggles in life.

Question from Velma: I would like to, find your soul mate, but most men in my age group 60, want a traditional woman to cook and clean and a man to think for her. I’m not a traditional woman and I’m tired of pretending to be helpless. How do we as women maneuver in a world of the insecure man?

My answer – be both cake and ice-cream. Sometimes you are soft like ice cream and sometimes you are in charge and embrace your masculine energy and be cake.

What’s your answer Arifah

Keep doing what you love and make yourself a priority to level up.

Question from Elizabeth:

Should I be looking to, find your soul mate,  of just someone to keep me warm at night?

When you are in your fifties and you have to start all over dating, do you date to find a husband or should you be okay with someone to keep you warm at night.

My answer- Someone to keep you warm at night. Women over 40 have a very slim chance of finding a husband, but you can definitely, find your soul mate!

What’s your answer Arifah?

Its up to you, based on what you are looking for in the present.  Dating, can work either way, based on what you end up wanting.

Arifah is the Founder and Program Director of Lifted by Purpose.

Lifted by Purpose Provides a diverse range of services to organizations seeking trainings, workshops or programs with the intent to engage youth in conversations about mental health and learn practical strategies to cope with life stressors. Including:

  • Anger Management
  • Healthy Relationships
  • Mental Health Education and Coping Skills
  • Youth Engagement and
  • Mental Health First Aid Training

Located at 180 Shaw St, suite 201, Toronto, Ont.  Phone # 416-391-5270

 Additional Resources for, How to Find your Soulmate

https://myhelps.us/sex-and-spiritual-energy-the-tree-of-life/

 

Is the Secret to Love, Sex?

https://myhelps.us/the-alchemy-of-desire/

https://blog.mindvalley.com/vibrational-energy/

https://sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2017/love-actually-science-behind-lust-attraction-companionship/

 

 

 

Life Coaching, lifecoaching, Mindset Transformation, Personal Development, personal development podcast, podcast, positive change, purpose, transform your mind

Six Holistic Ways to Find your Purpose

Are you on a quest to, find your purpose?  It is the only way to find fulfillment and the secret to happiness.  Dr. Ken Keis shares six holistic approaches or benchmarks in your quest for, purpose.

Intro to our topic:

Dr. Ken Keis, is a highly sought-after author, speaker, trainer, podcast host, and TV and media guest. His latest books include: Why Aren't You More Like Me?, Deliberate Leadership, and The Quest For Purpose.

 

A story on how to find your purpose

So many people listening have been trapped down a pathway that was really sort of conditioned from their background. I woke one morning and asked myself if this was what I wanted to be doing in 20 years from now, and the answer was no. So, I immediately took action. I decided to quit farming and hired a coach to help me figure out what I wanted to do in life. My, quest to, find my purpose,  began. What was my purpose in life? The answer, to help others to live, lead and work on purpose. This is the question to, find your purpose.

My coach passed away from cancer many years ago now, and I just took his process and then added and enhanced it. Basically it was a self-discovery narrative and an interactive sort of process to, find your purpose.

What are the six Holistic approaches to, find your purpose?

A lot of times what happens people don't realize their, purpose, because the question is too big. It's overwhelming and what we're trying to do here is get people to fine tune all the components of their life to go to the next level.

Sponsored AD
• I want to give a shout out to our sponsor for this episode … iPayTotal
• Does your business fall into the High risk category? Like CBD, Gaming, Gambling, Travel. Pharmacy, or Time share
• and you have been Rejected by other merchant account providers?
• No problem… iPayTotal wants your business!
• iPayTotal delivers payment solutions and products to help grow your business.
• Contact them now for your payment processing at [email protected] or visit on the web at https://www.ipaytotal.com”

iHeart Radio

Benchmarks to Finding your Purpose

So let's go through these benchmarks to, find your purpose.

1. First Benchmark is, Personal Style, CRG is an assessment company. In our quest to, find your purpose, one of our assessments is called “the personal style indicator.” We believe that we are all born with a certain Personal style. Not right not wrong and we develop and we change and we mature in life but our personal style never changes. Myrna is the same Myrna from 10 years ago. In other words Myrna can wake up in the morning and still count on Myrna being Myrna.

2. Biophysical Influences, like Health concerns, physical and mental disabilities. The statistics of North American health is that 75 to 80 percent of people are unwell at some level and another 50 percent are diabetic or pre-diabetic. So there's no way if I am thinking of, finding my purpose,  if I'm sick. I don't have energy, I have chronic fatigue syndrome, I have immunity disorder or whatever is going on. 90 to 95 percent of all illness is lifestyle related. In my quest to, find my purpose, I need to take my body and treat it well. If I have a racehorse and I don't take care of that racehorse and then try to have it win the Kentucky Derby, it’s not going to happen.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

3. Self-worth – What you think of yourself. We have another assessment called “the self-worth inventory” to, find your purpose,  our confidence levels highly influence the decisions we make or not make. So maybe you actually have an idea of your, purpose, but you don't have the courage to step into it.

4. Environmental systems – Schools , workplace, culture. We are a product of our environment. If I grew up in Florida versus LA or New York, Toronto or Vancouver versus Afghanistan, I'm going to have a different perspective on life and possibly a different path to, find my purpose.

5. Social Teachers – Parents, teachers, pastors As a kid you you very curious. You watched how your parents interacted, they're teaching you how to treat others. The songs you listened to there's now linkage towards violence and video games. In your quest to, find your purpose, be aware of what you’re letting in, who you’re working with, who are nurturing your personal relationships.

6. Emotional Anchors or triggers – Divorce, physical and verbal abuse, death of a loved one are all triggers. Any kind of event in life that causes either positive or negative associations becomes a trigger. Every single person listening or reading has triggers. You had an event in life that creates an emotional response. This goes back to a trigger that has been anchored, in many cases these triggers are subconscious. In your quest to, find your purpose, you don't realize your, purpose, because you’re angry. You can also have unforgiveness. You have not really released yourself of this traumatic event. I had my girlfriend when I was 21 years old murdered by a friend of mine. If I didn’t let go of that event from 1982, it would affect me forever.

7. Spirituality, – This is a bonus because it covers everything. We are spiritual beings have a human experience. All of these seven benchmarks, come together to develop the whole person. They are essential in our quest to, find your purpose. That's why developing all these areas is critic to finding your, life purpose.


Transform your mind iTunes link

 

Because we are spiritual beings having a human experience, our thoughts are so powerful. What you believe is the environment in which you live. Dr Bruce Lipton talks about the fact and the fact that our perceptions affects our reality.

Spirituality, is also consciously spending time developing yourself. It is a fact that you create your world. Most of us believe that we are product of circumstances; but if you believe that you actually can design and create your world, that's what you will create. So yes, spirituality, the spiritual part of you is very important to, finding your purpose.

Sponsored AD
If you would like to improve the quality of your life and don’t have the budget to hire a coach, then I have an offer for you. Why not play the game of life and learn the skills to maneuver life situations. How many of you have played the game of monopoly and learned the value of having property to collect rent?
Points of You® is a leading company in the field of training for personal and business development.
Points of You use games to explore significant life themes in a fun, unique and powerful way.

Games are designed for use by professionals, organizations or individuals.
The games are designed to help you look deep inside yourselves and the environment around you.
It is a stimulating exploration that sharpens our senses and opens up new possibilities.
Who can use Points of You Games?
• Anyone wishing to reconnect and enhance communication with themselves and others.
• Anyone in search of fresh perspectives on dilemmas, relationships and decision making.
• Those seeking inner change and the opportunity to build new bridges.

Points of You is a collection of various games.
1. The Coaching Game features 65 associative cards that explore significant everyday life themes.
2. Punctum fosters associative connections between photos, themes and questions. These flexible combinations make it a fascinating tool, highly effective in dynamic therapy, coaching and counseling.
3. Faces is a powerful way to get to know ourselves through the observation of others.
For more information or to purchase one or more games. Would make a prefect Christmas gift for someone you love.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Conclusion

Very powerful conversation with Dr. Ken Keis. Dr Keis is the author of “The Quest for Purpose” A self-discovery process to find it and live it!
To listen to the full episode, download on iTunes, Google play, Sticher, TuneIn radio, iHeart radio.

To quickly summarize, Dr. Keis gave us seven personality development models called benchmarks, that can help you in your quest to, find your purpose, we talked about personality style, we talked about wellness and stress and how it affects how you show up in life, we talked about, self-worth and self-confidence. How that affects what you go after. We talked about the, environmental systems, where you were born and what your parents expect you to become. We talked about, social teachers, the news and our, emotional triggers. If something bad happened to you a lot of times, people can't get over it. This event hijacks them and it controls most of their thinking.

We talked about, spirituality, which is all-encompassing because we are spiritual beings and what we believe, has one of the most predominant effects in your quest to, find your purpose.

Download a FREE eBook version of Dr Ken Keis book “The Quest for Purpose”

Remember to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, iHeart radio, and please leave a review if you find this podcast Helps you Live Your Best Lives Now!

Additional Resources:
https://myhelps.us/how-to-awaken-to-your-souls-purpose/
https://myhelps.us/how-can-millennials-find-their-purpose/
https://myhelps.us/how-to-become-a-diamond-by-finding-your-purpose/
https://myhelps.us/how-to-become-lifted-by-your-purpose/
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-quest-for-purpose_b_6575194
https://www.forbes.com/sites/danpontefract/2016/02/04/the-story-of-candice-and-her-quest-for-purpose-at-work/

Life Coaching, Personal Development, personal development podcast, podcast, relationship coaching, Self Love, women

In a Unhealthy Relationship? Should you Stay or Go.

So many women stay in, unhealthy relationships, and complain.  They feel unsatisfied, they feel unappreciated,  they feel disconnected, but they stay because they don't want to be alone.  Blake D Bauer, relationship coach lets you know the signs when you should go, if you have given it all you got.

In this Blog and podcast, Blake D Bauer and Myrna Young, Life Coach, are going to be talking on the topic, unhealthy relationships, vs, healthy love.  So ladies download and listen to the full interview because we're gonna be talking about men and how to understand your man.

Listen to full interview here:

Introduction to Blake D Bauer and, Unhealthy Relationships

Myrna – How did you become an Author, Teacher and a Relationship Coach?

Blake – As a young man I struggled a lot psychologically and emotionally and I didn't have a lot of healthy men role models in my life, so to cope and survive I got into drinking alcohol, partying and doing drugs.

As a man I instinctively learned how to survive by repressing my emotions.  I spent a lot of time in the gym building up my ego and building up my muscles which is a very common masculine tendency.

It's ironic because all that was my subconscious way of protecting my heart and my vulnerability and surviving the world.  We all do that in our own way; but these are the common male tendencies.

Later I developed a desire to understand my purpose in life, which is another topic I think is really important for men.  If we don't have a very clear sense of purpose, it's hard for us to be strong for our family, for the women in our life and our business. I found that my purpose was to become a, relationship coach, helping women understand when they are in, unhealthy relationships.

Sponsored AD
Blue Cheese dedicated to Nupsey Hussle
Blue Cheese dedicated to Nupsey Hussle

BleuCheese by:Frank Blacq dedicated this track in the loving memory of Nipsey Hussle follow me @Fblacq229

https://youtu.be/ROGAM_HG-5o

Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
Download on Spotify

Men really do need a very clear sense of purpose, to be a captain of the ship or be a king for his queen.  I started waking up every morning trying to answer two questions.

  1. How do I free myself from this suffering of, unhealthy relationships?
  2. What's the purpose of my life?

This question led me to five different universities where I studied psychology, nutrition, theories of education and early childhood development,  Chinese Medicine including acupuncture and oriental medicine.

I then had a series of insights where I could see how, unhealthy relationships, including the, unhealthy relationship, with myself, was fueling, unhealthy relationships, with others.

In other words if we never learn how to love ourselves as children, it can lead to physical disease, psychological and emotional suffering like depression, anxiety,  bipolar disorder and, unhealthy relationships.

Sponsored AD

Have you ever been stuck? In a bad marriage, toxic relationship or unfulfilling Job? Then Stuck – A short-story on Moving Towards Success by author Dr. Alphonso A. Buie is the book for you.

Marc was a successful and admired corporate executive and Real Estate mogul in New York city when trouble arrived in his life. He loses everything.

With the guidance of a great mentor and coach, he learns how to become unstuck and get his life back.

This fictional short-story, inspired by real-life events, teaches different concepts, that can be utilized by anyone who wants to excel at managing themselves effectively in any professional and personal setting.

Pick up a copy of Stuck today from Amazon or wherever books are sold and get moving towards your success.

Stuck A short story about success
Stuck

Blake – There was a point in my journey when I realized that everything was really about how you learn to love yourself and value yourself on a daily basis; because that's the key to your health and happiness.  It's also the key to, healthy love, and, healthy relationships.

In my book “You Were not Born to Suffer” I share all my findings on, unhealthy relationships, vs, healthy love.

You were not born to suffer in unhealthy relationships
You were not born to suffer in unhealthy relationships

Why is Finding your Purpose Important for, Healthy Love?

Blake – One of the big questions that everybody asks is,  Does money and wealth equal success and happiness?  So that was the question I kept asking myself.  Is success and happiness equivalent to financial success? Can you find, healthy love, if you have lots of money?

I had actually grown up around people who had been very successful financially; but who were very self-destructive and in, unhealthy relationships.

I saw people chase money, get it and lose it again doing drugs. They hurt their children, ruined their marriages and they all had, unhealthy relationships.

  • So I started asking the question, What is the purpose of Life?
  • I was plagued and tortured with questions like, Why did I come to this planet?
  • Is there a God?

From the age of 18 to 24,  I was on this very intense healing spiritual and personal development journey. I felt that the reason I had come to the planet and my purpose was to share my insights on self-love with as many people as possible.

If I could teach others how to love themselves then they would be able to love others and have, healthy relationships.

How does the Emotional Health of men lead to, Unhealthy Relationships?

A lot of women go into, unhealthy relationships,  with men and they don't get what they're looking for because the man is not emotionally ready.

Sometimes as a woman you can also be seeking love from a man that you don't give yourself,  or that you didn't get from your father. For example, it's really important to have that self-awareness.

I am  spending time with this guy because I really enjoy his company, I really enjoy his energy.

He's supportive,  he's loving,  he's present plus I'm attracted to him.  We should be having a, healthy relationship, but we are not. So if he is not giving me what I need, then I have to analyse why I am with him.

Ask these questions.

  • Did you enjoy his company?
  • Did you like feeling protected?

You want to build something with this man, so you start to open up.  You tell him, I feel X Y and Z.  Pay attention to whether he can really hear you.

  • Does he listen and respond?
  • Or  does he check out and become distracted?
  • Or does he change the topic?

Another good question to ask is:

  • How do you feel about this or that?
  • How does he feel about regrets in his life?
  • How does he feel about the importance of communication or emotional connection?
Sponsored AD

As a boxer for over 20 years, I have been Helping athletes and fighters reach their ultimate conditioning with 6 pack Abs and a low body fat index. As a fitness coach and the winner of several championships, I know the role nutrition plays getting that ultimate body.

Fight Club Nutrition a black owned company has put together a catalog of nutritional supplements to bring out the best fitness body.  Try our Iron Body Fat burner or the Alpha Wolf to increase testosterone.

Ladies you should definitely buy this for your man.

Head over to www.fightclubnutrition .com for the best nutritional supplements for athletes.

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Blake – This is how you know if you can have a, healthy relationship, with this man.

If you don't get the response that you want, this is the red flag that you are in an, unhealthy relationship.

A lot of men use this mask, I don't like to talk.  I don't like to talk about my feelings.

If you get that response,  say I need a partner who is able to open up and talk about his feelings, because that's  important to me.  As a woman looking for a, healthy relationship, you need a partner who can connect to you emotionally and be there for you and be your best friend as well as a lover.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

If you don’t demand what you want, this would be a whole relationship based on you betraying yourself, so the key from the beginning is don't betray yourself.  If you're betraying yourself right now, STOP because it's never going to get better.

Many women go into relationships thinking, I am going to fix this man up. He is a work in progress! He is like a fixer-upper, I'm gonna flip this house, I'm gonna flip this man. I'll just put some nice new wallpaper and everything will be great.

NO it never works,  it just doesn't work.

Sponsored AD

COVID and an economic free-fall have been a devastating one-two punch for businesses. Wouldn’t you like a real stimulus package other than the government throwing money at you? We’ve created the simplest and most effective platform your business needs! Go to https://www.howeasyy.com/ and you’ll discover 13 money-making software applications that will explode your growth! These software applications will allow you to attract new customers, streamline your business’ workflow, and utilize online and social media platforms for maximum success!

Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

What does, Healthy relationships, look like?

If you're looking for this great of a husband then you have to be a great wife.  If you're looking for a, healthy relationship, then you've got to understand what are you bringing to the table,  starting with self-love. You’ve got to fix yourself because even if you do get the man,  he might not stay because you're insensitive, you're bitchy, or you complain all the time.

You've got to be the best version of yourself, you've got to be able to understand what you what you want up front and ask for it.

Healthy relationships, are merely a projection of the relationship you have with yourself.  It directly connects back to where you have unhealthy thought habits and unhealthy habits of internalizing your emotions or pretending you feel different than you feel.

What are the steps to check if you are in an Unhealthy Relationship?

There's a couple of practical approaches and mindsets that go with having, healthy relationships.

  1. One is that you have to become very aware of what you're feeling on a daily basis, so for example you can just ask yourself, What do I feel right now in my body?
  2. Get used to saying – I feel hungry, I feel hot,  I feel frustrated,  I feel sad, I feel depressed.  I feel unloved, I feel angry, I feel alone.
  3. Become intimate with your feelings.
  4. On a daily basis talk openly and honestly with your friends, your family or your partner.
  5. Find someone that you feel safe with that and who you can talk to on a daily basis about what's going on inside of you.  If you don't have a friend or a family member that you can talk to openly and honestly, then it's important to find a therapist.
  6. Another thing you can do on your own or until you talk to someone, is to get a diary or a journal and write, Dear Universe or Dear God, depending on what you believe. Some people have a connection with a deceased loved one, like their mother or their father or a grandparent,  you can write to your loved one who has passed on as well.
Sponsored AD

“Are You Overweight And Tried Every Diet On Earth?” Then check out this new book by Joseph A. Laydon Jr., “169+ Lose It Or Else Weight-Loss Facts, Tricks And More!”. The author was working in South America when he started losing weight without trying. He was surprised because he was eating 3 fat-laden restaurant meals per day and did absolutely no daily exercises! He lost so much weight he had to buy SKINNIER CLOTHES! That why he wrote the book to share weight loss facts and tricks. So head over to www.survivalexpertblog.com and start your weight loss journey.

Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast

Podbean

You are in an, Unhealthy Relationship, should you stay or should you go?

Firstly, expressing your emotions honestly and kindly, is the first step if you are in an, unhealthy relationship.  Most of us never learned how to do that, and that sabotages relationships and makes us sick and miserable.  So you got to learn how to be open, honest, and  vulnerable on a daily basis.

  • Step two is acting in integrity, acting in alignment with what you feel and want and need. So how many people stay in, unhealthy relationships, and all they do is complain.  They feel unsatisfied, they feel unappreciated,  they feel disconnected;  but they stay and they complain.
  • They don't take action following what they feel, because they don't want to be alone. Yet most people in that situation feel alone anyway. They stay in an, unhealthy relationship, and stifle the chance of meeting someone new.

You should leave an, unhealthy relationship, if you've done everything you can in that situation to heal the relationship and the other person's not willing to help.

Conclusion for Unhealthy Love Relationships

You can leave without regret.  You know in your heart you gave it a hundred percent,  you gave everything you had.  You took the responsibility for your actions. This person did not meet you on the bridge!

Blake – My book “You were not born to suffer” is on Amazon, iTunes and audible.  It's on audio kindle and paperback, you can get it at any bookstore.  I normally teach at retreats throughout the year in person in the united states,  I teach a lot in the mountains in Colorado at a 600 acre Buddhist retreat center. Now that we have COVID  Check out my online events  on my website unconditional-self love. Com.

Follow the Transform Your Mind Podcast on Instagram @https://www.instagram.com/myrnamyoung/

on Facebook @https://www.facebook.com/Transform-Your-Mind-356442618235798/

on Twitter @https://twitter.com/myrna_young1

Join my Private Life Coach Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/193005424200128/

Subscribe to this podcast on iTunes https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/transform-your-mind-coach/id1144973094?mt=2

Additional Resources Unhealthy Relationships

https://myhelps.us/alchemy-desire-episode-5-long-term-relationship-dance/

https://myhelps.us/what-is-the-1-thing-women-can-do-to-improve-their-relationships/

https://www.mentalhelp.net/relationships/is-it-love-or-codependency/

https://time.com/5274206/toxic-relationship-signs-help/

blog, coaching, emotional intelligence, Life Coaching, Personal Development, personal development podcast, podcast

How to become Limitless: Emotional Intelligence Leadership

Become limitless, with, emotional intelligence leadership. Your, emotional intelligence leadership,  skills keeps track of everything.  It stores emotions,  holds emotional experiences.  Emotional intelligence self awareness, refers to your ability to notice and express your emotions.  How well you control your own emotions and to notice as well and to manage how those emotions affect you and affect us around you in positive or negative ways.

Listen to the Full Interview

 

Introduction to becoming Limitless with, Emotional Intelligence Self Awareness

My guest today is Adri Kyser, she is an international holistic wellness and personal development Coach.  We discuss the very exciting topic, renewing your mind, going from limited to, limitless by taping into our, emotional intelligence.

Adri Kyser yoga, uses the enlightened alchemy method that has helped thousands of women worldwide achieve everything from reduced pain and stress to increasing confidence and productivity. She's also the co-author of the best-selling book “Overcoming Adversity and Entrepreneurship”

She was born in Venezuela, went to Law school, (since I was born in Guyana, we are neighbors.) But when she came to the United States she felt not good enough, because she spoke with an accent.

Adri has helped over 4500 men and women worldwide change the narrative of their painful memories, so they can tap into their own super power and go from being limited to living a life of, limitless, potential.

Sponsor The Transform Your Mind Podcast
Sponsor The Transform Your Mind Podcast

The Four Components to becoming, Limitless

I found four key components to long-lasting health, happiness and fulfillment using, emotional intelligence leadership.

  1. Physical health – how you take care of your body
  2. Mental wellness – how you perceive the world number
  3. Emotional Intelligence – how you experience the world
  4. Spiritual connection – how you feed your soul including, Adri Kyser yoga

When you really begin to work on these foundations, these pillars you begin to shift and see tremendous transformations in your life.  You begin to heal from the inside out, and become empowered.  You are no longer driven by your negative voice.

The impostor syndrome that a lot of us have, especially women is that voice that's constantly saying.   Are you sure you can do that?  You're not good enough to do that.  That voice that feeds your fears, your insecurities and even your self-sabotaging behavior, that negative voice. Using your, emotional intelligence leadership, skills allows you to become aware of that voice.

Sponsored AD

Would you like to earn 6 digits monthly? Emmanuel Eduru, has a master degree in marketing and would like to mentor you. As An Entrepreneur and a network marketing professional, he has helped thousands of people to earn 6 digits monthly.

Emmanuel started his current business with little capital and today he has built a large organization with over 50,000 people spread across the globe. He would like to  mentor you so you too can go from zero to the top.  Say yes to a lifestyle of health and financial freedom. Visit Emmanuel on the web at www.emmaeduru.com for more information.

Myrna – If we want to change, then it's never from the exterior, it's always from the interior.  A lot of women feel they are not good enough. Michelle Obama wrote an entire book on this subject “Becoming”.  Even as the First Lady, she still felt not good enough.

We feel not good enough, when a person of authority tells us something negative and it becomes imprinted on our minds.

Most of the time we stuff it down and don't actually know that we are holding on to that hurt,  then it comes it comes up in chronic pain.  It comes up in overeating or even when you drink or take drugs or any of that stuff.  You are trying to artificially change your state;  but one of the best ways to change your state is to go inwards maybe in gratitude, because that's basically what I do.

Sponsored AD

“Are You Overweight And Tried Every Diet On Earth?” Then check out this new book by Joseph A. Laydon Jr., “169+ Lose It Or Else Weight-Loss Facts, Tricks And More!”. The author was working in South America when he started losing weight without trying.

He was surprised because he was eating 3 fat-laden restaurant meals per day and did absolutely no daily exercises! He lost so much weight he had to buy SKINNIER CLOTHES! That why he wrote the book to share weight loss facts and tricks. So head over to www.survivalexpertblog.com and start your weight loss journey.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

What is your method for teaching someone to understand what emotions they've stuffed down?

Adri – I call this process Enlightened Alchemy.  This is a process that was born from my personal experience and then from working with clients. It is the process of transforming the physical, mental, and emotional with, emotional intelligence leadership.  Including even the spiritual transformation of one's self.

What made these transformations successful, was not just addressing the pain or one particular area of life, it was addressing all those four components of life.  If you're ready to get the soulmate,  ready to lose the weight,  ready to make X amount of money in your business? I am here to help you go from limited to, limitless, using your, emotional intelligence leadership.

I'm here to help you go within, clear some stuff,  remove the stuff that's preventing you from, becoming limitless.  So you can feel empowered, so you can feel confident and know your true potential to,  become limitless.

Sponsored AD

O'Brien Garage Doors is a family-owned and operated garage door company that provides residential garage door services including repair, sales, installation services, and more. Whether your overhead door or operator needs to be repaired or you need to buy new ones, we service and sell all brands and models Of quality garage doors and automatic garage door openers.

We have been proudly serving our customers for over thirty years and are dedicated to providing them with friendly, honest service. Our technicians are certified and trained to take care Of all your garage door needs and are always courteous and happy to help. call: (888) 973-0061
Or visit: https://obriendoor.com

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Myrna – As Coaches we are supposed to be enabling our clients, we're supposed to be having our clients understand their blockages,  understand what’s preventing them from becoming, limitless, by looking at their past and seeing their patterns. Using, emotional intelligence leadership.

Is your Enlightened Alchemy based on the four principles: the physical, the mental, the emotional, and the spiritual?

Adri –  Yes. I also call myself an energy alchemist, because I do a lot of energy work and activation.

Because everybody's unique,  I truly believe in the holistic approach, mind, body, emotions and spirit; so that everything we do whether it's business coaching or life coaching or whatever it is includes all four pillars.

How can, emotional intelligence leadership, help someone with emotions that they've stuffed down?

Adri – Your body remembers everything that you've ever done.  Every emotion, every thought, how you're eating, how you're sleeping.  It keeps track of everything.  Moving to the  mental part of your thoughts, on average an individual has about 70 000 thoughts per day.

About 10% of those thoughts are original thoughts so meaning 90% of your thoughts are repetition of the day before, or  weeks before, or even years before.  The problem with this, is your belief will affect your biology. Meaning your belief will affect how your body responds.  It changes your biochemistry.

So that's why the mind and body are so important.  Emotional intelligence self awareness, keeps track of everything.  It stores emotions,  holds emotional experiences.   Emotional intelligence leadership, refers to your ability to notice and express your emotions.  How well you control your own emotions and to notice as well and to manage how those emotions affect you and affect us around you in positive or negative ways.

Sponsored AD

You are invited to the M.B.A for CEOs, A  Business Strategy Bootcamp! This exclusive 3-day event, 15 hand selected business owners will come together to develop their annual business strategy. Lead by Master Business Coaches, Collette Portis and Reggi Kemp,  each business will craft a strategy to increase their revenue, social media following, community impact, and level up their network. Event date July 29-31 Atlanta, GA. Register today at www.redwoman.win.

This Business Strategy Bootcamp is sponsored by  RED Development Group. This team has successfully helped their clients double their revenue in as little as 10 months. So, if you're ready to better manage your business, build your A-Team APPLY TODAY at www.redwomen.win.

Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

What people don't know is that emotions are molecules that carry information that affect the functioning of their cells their emotions.  Emotional Intelligence, will affect your biology just as your thoughts.  So, emotional intelligence leadership, is important, because if you don't have, emotional intelligence self awareness, you are not able to relate with the world around you or with others.

You're not able to read the social cues.  Emotional intelligence leadership, also empowers you to take control back of your life.  You're no longer coming from a victim place, you're no longer pointing fingers, because that person did this to me.  Emotional intelligence leadership,  is about understanding how you're managing the emotions that you're experiencing.

Emotional Intelligence to become Limitless
Emotional Intelligence leadership to become Limitless

According to Ayurveda the emotions that are not expressed or digested properly, gets buried in your tissues and fascia and will affect your physical well-being.  So over 15 years of teaching, Adri Kyser yoga,  and wellness, I have had students who cried after releasing these emotions that were buried in their tissues.

We hold anger in our liver,  grief is in our chest and lungs.

The other thing I like about, emotional intelligence leadership,  is it gives you the opportunity to take your power back.  So if someone is making you angry,  then you can ask yourself,  why am I choosing to be angry about this?

Sponsored AD

How would you like to grow your sales in the next 90 days? Dotlogics is an eCommerce web design and growth agency that has vested interested in seeing your business grow. As more and more consumers are shopping online, now is the time to take your online business to the next level with a growth-driven website. Dotlogics can help boost your sales in 90 days.

It's been a challenging year so far and Dotlogics will help you adapt your strategy to thrive in 2020. Get a custom-crafted website that's not only functional but speaks to your customers or audience in a way that moves them to action. They are seasoned online marketers. They will help design and implement digital marketing campaigns that generate more leads.

To learn more or schedule a time to talk, visit: www.dotlogics.com

Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
Download on Spotify

Then you can move to asking yourself, what is triggering this emotion within me?

You can take your power back, by not letting people trigger you. The other part about triggers is recognizing what part within you is getting triggered.  Where the hurt coming from, because if you come and tell me Adri you are not a good rocket scientist, I wouldn't get triggered.

You can only be triggered by limited beliefs. Limiting beliefs keep you limited not, limitless.

If somebody right now tells me either you're a horrible coach or you're a bad yoga teacher. It will probably trigger me because it could be true.

If there's a trigger still around, that means there's still a part of me that's not healed. If you are still being triggered, you've gotta rub it out.  Figure out what is making you angry? What is this anger telling me?  Using, emotional intelligence leadership, skills and having the responsibility and the maturity and the tools necessary to go deeper and figure it out. It’s not saying that, Adri Kyser yoga, never gets angry.

We have to feel our emotions in order to process them, that's emotional intelligence leadership.  In order to release them and in order to learn the lessons that they want to teach us, so the next time your reaction may be milder.

Sponsored AD

Welcome to Cotton For The Soul™ podcast, (www.cottonforthesoul.com) an up close and personal raw & unfiltered perspective on life experience of eating a plant-base diet. Spreading Good vibrations while living a minimalist lifestyle outside the matrix.

Whether you have taken the pill of knowledge or the pill of blissful ignorance, thank you for tuning in from down the rabbit hole. Now, buckle your seat-belt because it's about to get real! We upload a new episode every Thursday

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

How do you go from limited to, limitless with, Emotional Intelligence Leadership

If you're operating with, limited mindsets, then you are going to be limited. I like to start with the physical body, because that's where you're going to start seeing the fastest results.  When you feel safe and secure, when you are comfortable in your own skin, then you're going to be able to go deeper into the other layers.

So to become, limitless,  it's recognizing where your self-imposed limitations are.  We can learn to fly and soar in our personal relationships, in our growth.  The limits that we have, oftentimes come from self-imposed limitations or limits that other people have put on us. When it comes to living a, limitless, life it is working in your mindset and working on your, emotional intelligence leadership.

It's really about becoming aware.  Awareness is key.  Thoughts and emotions you're experiencing on a regular basis it is important to be aware.  Grab a journal and start the practice where you write down the thoughts and emotions you're having on a regular basis. Once a week or once a month review what you're writing.

You're going to see patterns.  You're going to say “oh my gosh look how many times I thought about this and that.”

Emotional intelligence leadership, is key. You cannot change something you don't know.  That it's like being in a dark room that's dirty and messy; but because the lights are out, you don't see the the mess or the dirt until you turn the lights on.

I created a workbook that I'm happy to offer to your podcast listeners.  It’s free.  It's simple, but it gives you some exercises and things that you can implement right away for you to become aware and notice some of your limiting beliefs that run in the background.

So with this workbook can take you from limited to, limitless.  I give you the tools to become aware of your limiting beliefs.  It allows you to understand that the universe is unlimited and the universe is abundant.

How can our listeners get a copy of your workbook.

My website is www.adrikaiser. They can also go to adrikeiser.com/free-gifts

Conclusion 

If you decide to step out of your comfort zone and if you're willing to work on yourself and use your, emotional intelligence leadership, and you're willing to try something new.   You can find new levels of strength, confidence, comfort or success that you never thought possible.  So push yourself, because if you stay in your comfort zone, you're never going to excel at anything.

I invite you to subscribe to the Transform your mind podcast YouTube channel to watch this interview live.

Additional Resources 

https://myhelps.us/how-does-emotional-intelligence-affect-your-success/

https://globalleadershipfoundation.com/geit/eitest.html

 

The Secrets to Thriving Not Just Surviving