Tag Archives: life coach

How to Create Positive Core Beliefs

 

Do you know that your, core beliefs, affect everything you do in life? Well it’s true.  What you believe is how you show up in every circumstance in your life.

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For example: Do you consistently find yourself in situations where men are trying to bully you or treat you less than you are worth? It may because of a, core belief, that started with how your father treated your mother or even you.

Introduction Core Beliefs 

Your, core belief, could be that you are a victim and that belief keeps you trapped in that story.

The thing about a, core belief, is that it cannot be easily changed.

Here is a quote from Tony Robbins that explains the power of, core beliefs,:

“All personal breakthroughs begin with a change in, core beliefs. So how do we change? The most effective way is to get your brain to associate massive pain to the old belief. You must feel deep in your gut that not only has this, core belief cost you pain in the past, but it's costing you in the present and, ultimately, can only bring you pain in the future. Then you must associate tremendous pleasure to the idea of adopting a new, empowering belief.”

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Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

We all have existing, core beliefs, in four areas:

  • How we feel love,
  • our self-worth,
  • how we feel security, and
  • fulfillment.
  • Life after death. 

Your, core beliefs, can't be changed simply by throwing out an old one and adopting a new one, like changing your wardrobe. The change must come at the level of self-awareness to help you achieve any goal. 

Examples of, Positive Core Beliefs 

A, positive core belief, is pure and direct. It gives you a clear sense of who you are. It isn’t confused, conflicted, or compromised. Let’s take steps to make this the kind of, core belief, you are activating. Step one is to bring your, core beliefs, into awareness. The four key beliefs you want to activate are:

  • I am loving and lovable.
  • I am worthy.
  • I am safe and trusting.
  • I am fulfilled and whole.

The bible teaches that for God to answer prayer you must first believe and have faith that God is first able and willing to give you the desires of your heart; but there are ways to improve the chances that God will answer your prayer. A prayer is a special kind of intention or, core belief.  Therefore, the rules that apply to the,  Power of intentions, which are rules about consciousness, apply.

Your prayer will be answered, or not, depending on events happening out of sight – but not out of mind. The mind furnishes the mechanics of making any intention come true. An intention or prayer request, sent to God needs faith to rocket it to the heavens. An intention to graduate at the top of your class or to marry the man of your dreams takes focus, diligence and action. The bible also teaches “Faith  Without Works Is Dead”.

Are you rejecting love because of your, core belief? 

If you have not found love even after several tries, then you have to look deeply at what you are doing to push love away.  Do you have a, core belief, that you are unlovable? How much pain is that belief causing you? It will take a lot of work; but you have to believe that God’s light shines in you and that you deserving of love and happiness.

Do you feel empty inside all the time even though you have all the outward symbols of success like a nice home, a loving husband, a good job, 2 kids and a dog? Then your, core belief, could be that you need to make a contribution to the world like Mother Theresa or like Nelson Mandela to feel fulfilled. You have to change that, core belief, that maybe your purpose is to support your children and help them to fulfill their purpose in the world.  Sometimes our role in God’s kingdom is not to change the world but to change one person!

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Here is A Self-Awareness Exercise to help you understand Your, Core Beliefs,

Look upon what's happening now in your life as a reflection of your, core beliefs.

Are there any patterns you see? For example:

  • Do all your relationships fail?
  • Are you in constant debt?
  • Do you find it hard to keep friends?

Listen to yourself. Once you figure it out, then turn it around. Ask yourself:

  • What do I want?
  • What would I have to believe in order to have this?

Next, you're going to re-program yourself.

You may need the help of a coach like, Myrna Young, or mentor but; self-awareness is the key to changing your, core beliefs,

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As Tony Robbins says, you must associate tremendous pleasure to your new, core belief,  For example. See yourself in a loving and fulfilling relationship, going on dream vacations and having a wonderful life together and believe that you are a woman any man can love!

Additional resources:

https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/challenging-automatic-thoughts-positive-thoughts-worksheets/

Our Cognitive Bias: Construction Of The Self-Concept

Self-concept refers to how one perceives themselves, their past experiences, their abilities, their prospects for the future, and any other aspect of the self. Aaron Beck’s cognitive triad, discussed below, deals with self-concept and the construction of the self. The basic idea of how our self-concepts and cognitive biases affect our lives has to do with automatic thoughts.

For example, someone with a negative “self-referential schema” is more likely to take things personally, leading to automatic thoughts like “People are not talking to me because I am an unlikable person”, rather than exploring other possibilities (Disner et al., 2017). A negative self-referential schema can also lead to increased severity of depression symptoms. Most importantly, a negative self-concept can lead to an unending cycle of negative thoughts.

This is because people with negative self-referential schemas exhibit an attentional bias. For example, when asked to decide whether an adjective is self-referential or not, people with depression are more likely to endorse negative adjectives than healthy controls, and they show an attentional bias by being quicker to endorse negative adjectives and quicker to reject positive adjectives than healthy controls (Disner et al., 2017). In turn, being likelier to endorse negative adjectives is correlated with longer “retrospectively reported” depressive episodes, demonstrating the cycle of negativity.

How to be Happy with Less

What does it take to be happy? We live in a culture where, happiness, is largely based on external forces – like what we get and what we achieve. And when our life conditions don’t match our expectations, we experience pain and fear, we suffer. But imagine what it would feel like to create a constant sense of inner peace and freedom, and live each day in a beautiful state of, happiness.

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What’s preventing you from, happiness, and living a life of peace and joy?

Do you believe that others make you happy or are responsible for your, happiness? I used to think so.  Until I realized that the definition of, happiness, is true.  Happiness, is moving in the direction of your goals and dreams. So because my, happiness, comes from my thoughts and actions, I take away the responsibility of my spouse, friends, co-workers being responsible for my, happiness.

I encourage you to Discover what’s holding you back from being happy. Tap into finding inner peace through meditation and mindfulness that you can use to start living in the, present moment. Happiness, is only found in the present moment. Not in the future or the past. This is the time to sit with your feelings of, unhappiness, pain and regret and maybe find the lesson in them.

Once you sit with pain and, unhappiness, and not try to mask it with drugs, food or any of the things you do to not feel your pain, you can step into the unknown, and allow life to unfold in the beautiful way it is meant to.

https://myhelps.us/how-to-find-happiness-in-2017/

How to be Happy in life,  in the present moment

One of the ways I live in the, present moment, is I become aware of the little things that is taking away my, happiness.  The small irritations like my husband not answering the phone when I call or my kids leaving the house and saying where they are going.

Learn, how to be happy in life, in the, present moment. No one is responsible for your, happiness. If you live in the present moment then the hurts from the past can't bother you.  I remember when Jennifer Gardner was being interviewed about the betrayal of Ben Aflac. He had cheated on her and they were separated and there was a big scandal.  Jennifer tried to stay in the, present moment, and be thankful for her 4 kids. She also said that Ben was not responsible for her, happiness. She alone is responsible for her, happiness.

Great lesson because when we give our power away, people will always trample on us.  Life gives sand life takes away.  The trick to, happiness, is not to be attached to the outcome.

3 Ways to Find Happiness After a Divorce

How to be happy in life, by relaxing and releasing

When I feel the, unhappiness, or irritation coming on me, I practice R&R  relax and release. When you feel that unwanted frustration you relax breathe deeply and release blow it out. Breathe deeply and blow it out through your mouth.

I learnt this in therapy.  When a situation makes you, unhappy, and you don't attend to the hurt or pain.  We stuff it down. We are not aware of what we are doing but we are hard wired to move away from pain and move towards pleasure, so when we feel pain or, unhappiness, we run from it.

So we self medicate with drugs, alcohol, food, sex, or whatever is around.  In that way, we bury the pain.  Whenever something is in the vicinity of this pain, we feel this tension in our gut because that is where we stored this pain.  We begin to be, unhappy and we are not even sure why so we again stuff it down with drugs, alcohol, food and sex.  We never want to feel.

To stop this cycle.  Whenever you feel this feeling.  Don't try to stuff down instead relax into it.  Feel the pain, sit with it. Then breathe.  Breathe to relax into it and then breathe it out. Try it next time some external situation makes you, unhappy.

5 Ways to Radiate on the Happiness Wheel

How to be Happy in life, with Less

In the, pursuit of happiness, material things such as money, a big house, fame, or fancy cars do not make us happy.  Instead we need to first love and accept ourselves to be happy.  Money or fame magnifies our, unhappiness, because now you are not sure who your friends are and you become obsessed about keeping this wealth.

How to be happy in life, with less is learning to find happiness in relationships, with family, with health, with being alive.

Daily habits to find, happiness 
  1. Smile. You tend to smile when you're happy. …
  2. Exercise. Exercise isn't just for your body, it is for the mind.  It releases endorphins for, happiness.
  3. Get plenty of sleep, serotonin, the feel good hormone is released during sleep.  That is why we are bitchy and, unhappy, with lack of sleep.
  4. Eat with the, pursuit of happiness, in mind. …
  5. Be grateful. Gratitude is the forerunner to, happiness.  You can't be, unhappy, if you are feeling, gratitude
  6. Give a compliment – giving a compliment makes other happy and that is turn makes you happy.  Happiness, is serving others.
  7. Breathe deeply. – breathing deeply releases tension in our muscles and relaxes the body.
  8. Acknowledge the unhappy moments – don't try to stuff them down or ignore them. They are already here. Acknowledge them and let them know you see them and that this too shall pass. You will be able to look back at these moments and laugh one day.