Myrna Young, host of the Transform Your Mind podcast, welcomes holistic psychotherapist Esin Pinarli to the show. Esin introduces therapies like IMAGO and brainspotting, which promote healing beyond traditional talk therapy. They also discuss the profound impact of attachment wounds on mental health. They delve into how these wounds from childhood and adult relationships shape attachment styles and influence anxiety, depression, and addiction. Learn about the different attachment styles and how they affect relationships and mental health, offering paths to healing and secure attachments. Tune in for insights on nurturing a healthier self.
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In an era where mental health has taken center stage, understanding attachment wounds and their profound impact on our wellbeing is pivotal. In a transformative discussion with psychotherapist Esin, we delve into the intricacies of attachment styles, the compelling modalities of Imago therapy and brainspotting, and the path towards healing and achieving secure relationships. This article explores how these attachments formed in our formative years influence our adult lives, shaping mental wellness in ways we might not even realize.
Key Takeaways Brainspotting:
Attachment wounds formed early in life continue to affect adult relationships, impacting our ability to form healthy bonds.
Therapies like Imago and brainspotting offer powerful tools to address attachment-related issues by engaging the body and mind together.
Understanding and transforming one’s attachment style can lead to improved mental health, reducing anxiety and depression.
The Untold Impact of Attachment Wounds on Your Mental Health
Understanding Attachment Styles and Their Formation
Attachment styles, established from our earliest interactions with primary caregivers, dictate how we relate to others in adulthood. Esin notes that securely attached individuals—comprising about 55% of the population—are comfortable with intimacy and independence, not plagued by fears of rejection or abandonment. “They are generally well-dispositioned,” she states, “feeling secure in both their personal worth and the stability of their relationships.”
Insecure attachment styles, including anxious, avoidant, and fearful-avoidant, emerge from inconsistent or traumatic early experiences. These styles manifest as hyper-vigilance for signs of relational danger, creating a nervous system that’s constantly on alert. This heightened state of anxiety can then trickle into other mental health challenges, such as depression or chronic stress. As Esin describes, these styles reflect “a lack of consistent, available, and nurturing connections,” culminating in insecure attachment behaviors that echo in adult relationships.
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Imago Therapy: Reconnecting and Healing Through Relational Dynamics
Imago therapy is designed to heal relational rifts by providing corrective experiences within the framework of relationships. This method, which Esin frequently employs with couples, emphasizes dialogue-based healing to unravel and address attachment wounds. “We can heal in relationships what we’ve been wounded in through relationships,” she shares, highlighting Imago’s belief that relational dysfunctions provide opportunities for healing.
Through Imago therapy, partners engage in structured dialogues to understand and empathize with each other’s triggers. “Your partner hitting a wound is actually wonderful,” Esin insists, illustrating that these moments can be catalysts for deeper healing. The therapy’s transformative potential lies in its ability to create new emotional experiences that counteract past hurts, ultimately fostering secure attachment patterns. This deep relational work not only mends frayed connections but also enhances personal growth, linking self-awareness with interpersonal healing.

Brainspotting: Tapping into Deep-Seated Emotional Healing
Moving beyond traditional talk therapy, brainspotting offers a novel approach by engaging both body and mind to release stored trauma and emotional energy. This technique is crucial for tackling pervasive emotional responses resulting from attachment wounds. As Esin explains, brainspotting leverages eye movement to access the subcortical brain, “where deeper memories and emotional processes reside, allowing for reprocessing and releasing entrenched trauma.”
Clients in brainspotting sessions are guided to focus on specific points that elicit the greatest emotional charge, often revealing subconscious triggers and past incidents that contribute to present-day distress. This method empowers individuals to confront and transform their internal landscapes, promoting neuroplasticity—the brain’s ability to form and reorganize synaptic connections. In Esin’s words, “What we think we know about ourselves is only a fraction of our conscious awareness.” Through brainspotting, therapy digs deeper into the subconscious, paving the way for profound emotional release and healing.
Navigating Mental Health Through Attachment-Aware Therapies
Esin’s insights into attachment styles and their therapeutic healing reveal a profound connection between early relational imprints and adult mental health. As discussed, understanding one’s attachment style is a crucial step toward alleviating anxiety, depression, and relationship conflicts. In essence, adopting a securely attached mindset involves cultivating parasympathetic activities like meditation, nature walks, and meaningful dialogues—practices that stabilize the nervous system and promote emotional balance.
The journey from anxious or avoidant patterns to secure attachment requires both self-awareness and transformative therapeutic experiences. Imago therapy’s focus on healing through relational dynamics, combined with brainspotting’s deep emotional processing, offers a holistic path to emotional well-being. This multifaceted approach underscores the intricate yet impactful nature of addressing attachment wounds within the therapeutic setting.
By unraveling the complexities of their internal worlds, individuals can transcend past attachments and foster healthier, more fulfilling relationships. As Esin eloquently puts it, “Awareness is the first step in change.” Through informed therapies and conscious efforts, the potential to transform one’s mental and emotional landscape is well within reach, paving the way for a more resilient and connected life.
Additional Resources Brainspotting
Esin Pinarli’s Website: Eternal Wellness Counseling, where she provides therapy and resources.
Social Media: Follow Esin Pinarli on Instagram at @esinpinarly_lcsw for further insights and free resources.
Book Reference: “Attached” by Amir Levine, exploring the subject of attachment styles in detail.