The, power of Intention, is defined as a strong purpose or aim to fulfill your dreams. This power is an invisible force of energy in the Universe. We access this force when we become inspired; dormant forces come alive in us and propel us towards our goals. That force is called the, Power of Intention.
Don’t wait to fall through a hole to experience a new world, be deliberate about your life; intentionally create the world you want to live and play in.
We are all born with the power of intention
Every baby is born with a purpose, every baby is pure, intention. Even before the Seed is matched with the Egg; the, Power of Intention, sets in motion what you will physically look like at your birth.
Your height, your bone structure, the color of your eyes and your non-physical attributes are also predetermined; ie your personality, how you will handle stress and your emotional IQ etc. Babies are born with the potential to walk, speak, read, and do mathematics. Nothing is left to chance. It’s possible to locate which areas of the brain that will eventually produce these abilities, but until then, they exist as pure potentials and intentions.
” I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations” ~~~Jeremiah 1:5
Here are 3 ways to access the energy field of Intention
The spoken word – is a powerful tool, by levering our voice we expand our dreams from internal thoughts to external possibilities. So speak freely of your dreams and visions. By verbalizing your thoughts out loud you are empowering your dreams to the universe. You are entering the field of all possibilities. This is the predominant reason that coaching works. Inside the coaching conversation, you are speaking your goals and vision, sometimes for the first time.
Controlling your Thoughts – When you are aware of the company you keep in your head, you take back control of your life by being present in the present moment. The friends in your head in the form of your thoughts, determines where you end up in life. Just like when we were kids and our parents told us not to keep company with certain kids because they would be a bad influence; in the same way if we keep company with, negative thoughts, they become a bad influence.
Your parents did not know why but they knew that if you hung around bad kids then no good will come of you. In a similar way if you keep replaying, negative emotions, doubt, worry, insecurities, getting even, discontent, fear, blame in your head then no good will come of you. The first step is becoming conscious of your thoughts. Once you bring these thoughts from subconscious to consciousness, then you take back control.
Verbalize your vision – What you do and what you say are very important. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. When we declare our, intentions, to the Universe, we set the energy fields in motion. The bible teaches that words are carriers. Words carry the spirit of the person speaking. Spirit is the highest form of energy. To access the energy field of the, Power of Intention, we need to become aware of our energy levels.
There are five levels of energy:
1: The material world – it is energy slowed down so we can see form
2: The sound world – faster energy. We can sometimes feel sound vibrations.
3: The light world – when the high energy of light meets with the low energy of darkness; the darkness becomes light. In the same way when we keep our energy levels high, the low energy fields of doubt, depression, obstacles etc. cannot reach us because our light converts the low energy fields of negative emotions.
4: Our thoughts – the energy of our thoughts are higher than light and sound. Every thought we have can be calculated to see if it has the positive energy to access the power of intention or the negative energy of doubt that impedes our forward movement and progress.
5: The energy of spirit – The highest level of energy is that of spirit. Spirit is the energy force of Creation. Kindness, Beauty, Love, Expansion are also forms of spirit energy.
Make raising your energy levels a priority in life. Low energy is an attractor pattern. If you practice raising your energy then you will not attract low energy forms like depression, blame, loneliness, shame, anxiety etc.
Seven ways to raise your energy levels to access the Power of Intention:
Make meditation a regular practice. Meditation allows us to make conscious connection with our source. It also allows us to make conscious connection with our emotions, so that we develop discipline.
Become conscious of the foods we eat. Processed foods lower our energy, while fruits, vegetables and greens raise our energy levels. Drugs and alcohol including prescription drugs also lowers your energy levels. Retreat from drugs and alcohol even prescription drugs.
Becoming conscious of the music you listen to. Rock and Heavy metal music lowers your energy levels, while soft music about love, and classical music raises your energy levels.
Becoming aware of the energy in your home. Feng Shui is the art of choosing the right furnishings and accessories then arranging these furnishings to increase the positive energy in your home. Accessories can include paintings or photography. Photographs of your loved ones smiling and laughing in happier times, photographs expressing love or showcasing nature also raise your energy levels. You should also become conscious of the energy from relationships in your home. Tension and strife in your home not only lowers your energy levels; but it debilitates you. We cannot excel in any area in life, if we are not happy at home.
Immerse yourself in nature- experiencing the beauty of nature is a purely spiritual experience. The energy of spirit is the highest level attainable.
Commit to helping people in need. Acts of kindness expecting nothing in return raises your energy levels because kindness, compassion and service are spiritual experiences and the highest of the energy states. The beauty of kindness and giving expecting nothing in return is that you get that energy back in spades. The Bible teaches that in giving the tithe to God,” the windows of Heaven are opened and blessings pour out that you wouldn’t have room to receive.” In a similar fashion, when you give of yourself to the world, expecting nothing in return, the windows of Heaven open up and you get back more than you ever gave.
Millions of people suffer from at least one of the, compulsive behaviors, Compulsive shopping, Compulsive eating, Hoarding, Compulsive sexual behavior.
—often, even when the individual wishes they could stop—despite the fact that the act triggers negative outcomes, leads to interpersonal conflicts, or damages mental health.
Listen to full interview here:
Introduction to Compulsive Behaviors
Common activities that can develop into compulsions include, compulsive shopping, hoarding, eating, gambling, sex, and exercise. Though some behaviors are easier to over-indulge in than others, in reality, nearly any behavior has the potential of becoming a, compulsive behavior. Some people even talk compulsively, for instance.
There are also obsessive compulsive disorder, in which a compulsive person performs certain behaviors to relieve underlying anxiety or other negative emotions. A well-known example is a person who checks and rechecks everything—if the stove is turned off, for instance, or if the door is locked.
These behaviors rarely decrease anxiety in the long run; in most cases, they only provide temporary relief. In extreme cases, compulsive behaviors start to take over the person’s work, home, and social life, at the expense of normal activities.
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How are Compulsive Behaviors and addictions connected?
Compulsive behaviors, have a genetic effect and are often seen in identical twins. I know 17 year old identical twin girls who came into the foster care system at 4 years old and have had trauma. I attributed their, compulsive behaviors, to genes from their biological parents and environment from their early years in foster care. They started, compulsive behaviors, like stealing from about 5 years old, as they grew older that transformed into, compulsive shoplifting, then they started running away and couldn’t stop, now they are compulsively, hoarding.
Compulsion behaviors, often arise after stressful events, trauma, or abuse as we have seen in our study of addictions. When people engage in, compulsive behaviors, they become trapped in a pattern of repetitive actions or senseless thinking from which it can be difficult to break free.
Treatment is often key for overcoming, compulsive behaviors.
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How does normal behavior turn into, Compulsive Behaviors?
As far as the brain is concerned our rewards are reward important, so regardless of whether it comes from a chemical or an experience and you know that there’s a
reward and people who indulge in , compulsive behaviors, like gambling, eating, sex, and shopping, become trapped in the reward system of dopamine.
Types of Compulsive Behaviors
Compulsive behaviors, come in many forms, all of which can be quite debilitating or even dangerous.
Hoarding, for instance, are those who are unable to part with even the most worthless possessions. Many hoarders find the act of purging so distressful that they live under extremely crowded and potentially harmful conditions.
Compulsive shopping,
Compulsive eating
Over exercising
Hoarding
Compulsive cleaning
Compulsive Hoarding, is a psychiatric disorder which involves the accumulation of personal possessions to the point at which these accumulations interfere with your quality of life to a significant degree. The acquisition of “things” and failure to throw away unneeded objects can result in only mild symptoms of a cluttered home to a home which is too unsanitary for healthy living. At the current time, it’s thought that between two and six percent of the population is living with some degree of hoarding disorder.
Compulsively taking selfies and posting on social media
Compulsive sexual behavior or sexual addiction
What negative triggers enable Compulsive Behaviors like Hoarding.
The brain tricks us into thinking that we need the reward so we perform the, compulsive behavior, to re up the Dopamine
I know that as humans we move towards pleasure and away from pain. In my role as parent with kids who have, compulsive behaviors. These behaviors are cemented because they engage the reward centers of the brain.
How does one break that reward system for, Compulsive Behaviors?
Don’t wait until sexual temptation attacks you before you see it as a formidable force which seeks to destroy you. Its insidious tactic is designed to enslave you into sexual sins and keep you locked into erotic desires. How you perceive sexual temptation in your life, determines how well you will overcome its deceitful force, and walk in total victory.
“Naked and Ashamed, the Battle of Sexual Temptation.” is a Christian self-help book that explains what sexual temptation is, and gives you Biblical scriptures on how to control your sexual desires, and unnatural urges. With chapters such as recognizing the tempter, and rejecting the flesh, you will study strategies on how to recognize situations that tempts you, and learn how to keep your flesh under subjection. Although we will all be tempted sexually at some time, we can learn from this book on how to refrain from overreacting and falling into sexual bondage. So put on your seatbelt and get ready to be free from all of your unwanted sexual desires and temptations. Order “Naked and Ashamed, The Battle of Sexual Temptation” today! Written by Sheela Fields, now available on Amazon.
Sex Addiction Treatment
Let’s look at, compulsive sexual behavior, or sexual addiction. Sexual addiction, is represented by, compulsive behavior, in commonly available sexual practices, such as
Attending strip clubs,
Compulsive masturbation,
Paying for sex through prostitution,
Excessive use of pornography,
and repeated engagement in extramarital affairs.
Compulsive sexual behavior, otherwise known as sexual addiction, is an emerging psychiatric disorder that has significant medical and psychiatric consequences. Until recently, very little empirical data existed to explain the biological, psychological, and social risk factors that contribute to this condition. In addition, clinical issues, such as the natural course and best practices on treating sexual addictions, have not been formalized. Despite this absence, the number of patients and communities requesting assistance with this problem remains significant. This article will review the clinical features of compulsive sexual behavior and will summarize the current evidence for psychological and pharmacological treatment.
Dr Ahia What forms of, Sex Addiction Treatment, would you administer to someone suffering from, compulsive sexual addiction?
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How would you treat a youth that had the compulsion for taking selfies or even shoplifting?
Understanding the concept of ARETÉ — the Greek word for virtue and the pursuit of excellence in fulfilling one’s purpose. In the hustle of everyday life, it’s easy to become disconnected from our deepest aspirations and potentials. Brian Johnson, the founder and CEO of Heroic and author of ARETÉ, recently sat down with life coach Myrna Young to discuss tapping into our inner hero, overcoming fears, and living a more purposeful life. Drawing from a wealth of philosophical studies and personal experience, Johnson shares actionable steps toward self-improvement that promise to ignite our heroic fires.
Pursuit of Excellence: Understanding the concept of ARETÉ — the Greek word for virtue and the pursuit of excellence in fulfilling one’s purpose.
Overcoming Fear with Courage: The role of bravery in confronting life’s challenges and the necessity of courage for personal growth.
Daily Masterpieces: The importance of tackling self-improvement and excellence daily to create a cumulative impact on our broader life goals.
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The ancient Greek concept of ARETÉ is a rich and potent term referring to the pursuit of excellence aligned with our purpose. Johnson has embodied this term, making it the north star of his life’s work. He discusses with Myrna the notion that the pursuit of excellence must begin with the recognition that ARETÉ is attainable and deeply rooted in ancient wisdom and affirmed by modern science.
“It’s the essence of my life’s work,” Brian states, as he explains the fundamental importance of reducing the gap between our potential and our actions. When we operate below our capabilities, feelings of regret and dissatisfaction creep in. In contrast, living with ARETÉ fills the void with fulfillment and passion.
Johnson advises individuals to take some time away from distractions like Netflix and social media to reflect on who they aspire to be. He suggests visualizing our future selves and identifying moments in the past when we felt truly alive and fulfilled. Connecting these two points provides a clearer picture of what we can become.
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One of the supervening messages from Johnson’s discussion is the critical role of courage. Courage is not the absence of fear, but the will to act despite it. Johnson reinforces this through a personal anecdote about his son’s reluctance to participate in a chess tournament due to fear of defeat.
“The win there was going,” Johnson notes, marking the importance of the act of trying over the outcome. This illustrates the significance of instilling bravery as a value—not just in ourselves but in our successors.
The act of overcoming our inner doubter, that voice in our heads that beseeches us to play it safe, is essential for growth. Breaking through the fear barrier is a cornerstone of ARETÉ that Johnson passionately upholds: stepping into our challenges is how we kindle our inner hero.
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Making Today a Masterpiece: The Cumulative Effect of Daily Excellence
One of the objectives Johnson outlines in ARETÉ is the principle of making today a masterpiece. The idea is to focus on being our best selves in present moments, which sequentially contribute to a more significant, fulfilling future.
“Make today a masterpiece. Not someday, today,” Brian advises. He emphasizes this by advocating for an incremental improvement approach—stretching ourselves by just a minuscule percentage, repeatedly, can lead to accomplishing seemingly impossible goals.
This philosophy aligns with Johnson’s comment about teaching his son to focus on continuous learning and improvement, rather than solely on winning. By prioritizing our growth and learning from every experience, we tread a path toward mastery in our personal and professional lives.
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In retrospect, Brian Johnson’s conversation with Myrna Young is a vivid tapestry intertwining the ancient concept of ARETÉ with practical life lessons and philosophies. Readers are left with an empowering message of harnessing inner potential, facing fears with unyielding courage, and building a life of greatness through the accumulation of daily acts of excellence.
Johnson’s tale of his son’s chess tournaments serves as a microcosm of a broader narrative — that our greatest learnings and developments stem from our willingness to confront that which intimidates us. The acknowledgment that personal growth is a result of a steady, intentional, and courageous commitment to betterment is a takeaway that holds profound implications for anyone seeking meaning and vibrancy in their life.
By embodying the principles of ARETÉ such as wisdom, discipline, love, and courage, bolstered by gratitude, hope, curiosity, and zest, we don’t just approach life — we sculpt it, day by day, into a masterpiece. Brian Johnson’s insights serve as a reminder that the heroic resides not in the extraordinary but within the reach of our daily choices and courage to stretch just a little further into our greatness.
So how does it feel to be in a relationship with someone with, adult ADHD?
Here is one woman’s story af adult adhd
I dated 4 men with, adult ADHD, or ADD. One was predominantly hyperactive; two inattentive, one likely mixed. I fall under the vagueness of “mixed” myself, which means I show characteristics of hyperactivity — the impulsiveness, the occasional non-stop talk, the rash decisions — and inattention: the fuzziness, the daydreaming, the drifting off mid-conversation.
I learned the, ADHD, tricks early on like, touching him when I needed his attention and he was working. I learned to move my fingers from his face to mine — the universal signal for eye contact — when he began to drift off.
The two inattentive men, naturally tended toward household chaos, an inability to finish projects, and a desperate need for legal stimulants.
Understanding is the key to calming the chaos in the relationship.
I’m curious about, Adult ADHD symptoms. Does kids with, ADHD, become adults with, adult ADHD?
For clarity let’s make sure people understand the acronym for, ADHD, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Individuals can have, attention deficit disorder, without the hyperactivity and that disorder is ADD. Things to keep in mind about, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, or, Adult ADHD, is that, yes you can have, ADHD, in childhood and about 60% of kids grow up still having the same symptoms and become, adult ADHD. One of the interesting pieces about this is that it’s important for folks not to misconstrued information about what they’re seeing the adult exhibit. Certain characteristics of, Adult ADHD, can mimic other disorders like for example Thyroid disease.
Does the 40% of kids who don’t have, adult ADHD, become cured?
Not necessarily , they could have developed coping skills to manage the, ADHD, behavior so the symptoms were minimized. They could have also learned strategies on how to behave or how to compensate for the symptoms.
What are the different types of, Adult ADHD?
When you look at the diagnostic and statistical manual that psychologists use. It gives you clarity on how, Adult ADHD, is diagnosed. There are different types 3 types of symptoms that we see in, ADHD.
Inattention
Impulse Control
Hyperactivity
We have to go through the process and can’t have people diagnosing themselves or their children or anyone else with the disorder. Sometimes you have symptoms because people don’t have appropriate amounts of minerals in their body or they might be subject to low levels of magnesium. Things like that or people might have other diseases that might mimic, ADHD symptoms, so get these things ruled out with blood work.
ADHD in adults could mean you have an, ADHD, partner.
Here is what happening in their brain. What exactly is happening in the brain to cause someone to develop symptoms of Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder?
The Adult ADHD brain has impaired activity in four functional regions of the brain.
Frontal Cortex. This region controls high-level functions: …
Limbic System. This region is located deeper in the brain. …
Basal Ganglia. …
Reticular Activating System.
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To test for, adult ADHD, one has to look at the functions of the brain. The neurotransmitter in the brain is affected in ADHD. The prefrontal cortex is responsible for how we organize our cognitive flexibility and being able to control ourselves and things that come into our frame of reference.
The Basal Ganglia helps to regulate communication within the brain, sending signals from one neuron to the other and is responsible for our motor control movement. The Basal Ganglia is also responsible for regulating emotional volatility and the Reticular Activating System is our major relay system. It controls the many pathways that enter and leave the brain and is responsible for arousal and consciousness.
Dr Gray who is the author of Men Are from Mars Women Are from Venus wrote an article in which he claims that men with, Adult ADHD, have problems committing to women because of the disorder. Do you agree with that statement?
No, not at all. I think there are other reasons that men can’t commit to women. Dr Gray is trying to give these men a pass. I would love to see his research.
Does, ADHD, medications cure the disorder?
Medications for, ADHD, are non-stimulant and stimulant meds depending on what the individual the parents would choose. I always think of other Alternatives besides the use of pharmaceuticals. I would rather use in a non-medication treatment or neuro feedback to help with symptoms of, ADHD. Bio feedback can cure the disorder, medication just masks or controls but never cures.
if you give anyone who clearly has, ADHD, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, medication for 6 months and the other Bio Feedback for 6 months, you will see the difference in the treatment results.
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Does internet pornography rewire men’s brain to have, Adult ADHD?
I came across an article from Dr Gray and he was specifically talking about men who develop, Adult ADHD, because of pornography. He said pornography is re wiring men’s brain and causing them to develop, ADHD. He said pornography also blocks love and connection with their partner.
One out of ten American children have been diagnosed with ADHD,
One out of seven American women over 55 will develop dementia,
Statistics reveal a greater risk of ADHD in children of divorced parents, particularly when boys are missing the regular influence of their fathers or their mothers are unable to find happiness
In this podcast, coach Myrna shares how to find your life purpose. There’s a lot of pressure to find your, life purpose. You’ve probably heard the saying, “when God says go, just go.” But is that really the best advice?
In this conversation, we’re going to explore the truth about finding your, life purpose, and how to overcome any fears or doubts you may have. Back in 2000 God spoke to me and told me to Go that the USA is my, promised land, my land of milk and honey that I should leave my home in Toronto, Canada, my family, friends and Go.
He told me to go and he will show me the way when I get there. So, I packed my bags and moved to Florida and God did as he promised. He showed me the way. He ordered my footsteps. I just followed my intuition and looked for guidance. God said if you GO, I will make you a great nation, and I will make your name great. Today my podcast and my name Coach Myrna, is great, it is heard in 156 countries around the world. Don’t wait any longer, listen to this podcast and find out how to find your, life purpose.
The first thing I did when I got to Florida was to look for an office for my limousine service business. I found an office for my business, but it did not come with parking for a stretch limousine. I couldn’t find a place to park my limousine, so I had the brilliant idea to park it in a church parking lot. My reasoning was that church is only on a Sunday! they are not there during the week.
I promptly received a call from the Senior Pastor who told me if I wanted to park my limousine in the church parking lot, I should write a proposal of what I intended to offer in exchange. When I went to the church to drop off my proposal, I met the pastor who invited me to church. That started my relationship with Living Word Fellowship church, a relationship that was instrumental in the success of both me and my daughter, who was 11 years old at the time. That was God showing me the way, that was synchronicity.
I just kept moving forward only seeing the next step and never the entire staircase.
My life purpose was to become a Life coach and reach the world
Then God told me Go become a Life coach, I listened and that was also God ordering my steps because the month I graduated from Life coach school with my coaching certificate, was the same month I got fired from my corporate job. I became a self-employed Life coach and again God showed me the way. Someone invited me to be a guest on a radio show, and the radio station WDJY 99.1 FM Atlanta, offered me my own show. Then I heard about podcasting and stared a podcast then I received an email invitation for a TV show on PTWWNTV.
None of this was shown to me when I packed up and left Toronto. God said GO and I went.
Each step along the way God tested me by seeing if I was willing to do the work, he had to see what I was willing to sacrifice. I had to go through the wilderness. God said before I give you a lot, I have to see what you do with a little.
I remember when I was so broke and had no money for food or gas. I had worked all week and didn’t make a sale, so I didn’t get paid. God said GO to the ATM. I didn’t think I had any money in the bank, but I went and found I had $40 in my account. Don’t even know where it came from. I was ecstatic.
My life continued to be filled with favor and synchronicity.
I believe that I was born to bring light to others, that’s my Life purpose
What’s your purpose?
We see things not as they are but as we are.
You have to believe in the promise. God said I know the plans I have for you plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
If you don’t believe in the word or the spirit what God said about you, then you will Never receive the promise.
Have faith believe in the promise
For example, You have to believe in the word, the gesture and the spirit that God will turn every weapon formed against you for your good.
Everything God is going to do for you is already set aside, but sometimes he takes you the long way. The Israelites wandered in the wilderness for 40 years, that was not the direct route. Just keep asking yourself, what is my purpose.
The, power of Love, in Christianity is taught by Jesus, teacher and the Son Of God. He teaches us to love our neighbor as much as we love ourselves. The message is first you must love yourself. Loving yourself is more than providing the necessities of life for oneself. It is more than finding good employment, providing for one’ s family, a nice house and some money in the bank. It is deeper than that.
Love is spirit. It can be felt by strangers. It is a force of good and a power that connects us all. When you love yourself you take time to know and acquaint yourself with this force. We are dually physical and non-physical beings. Unfortunately most of us only concentrate on the physical because that is what we see.
The power of love, can be seen in how we love ourselves because we take care of our bodies. We exercise (some of us). We eat nutritious foods that nourish our bodies (some of us) and we protect ourselves from the sun and get the recommended amount of sleep (again some of us). But how often can a stranger feels your love because you gave them a welcoming smile?
How often do you find a quiet spot and pay attention to your breathing, your source and the center of your spirit? How often do you feel the love from a flower or from the stillness of a tree? God shows his love for us by the beauty he created in nature. When we show our appreciation for nature we find God and his love for us.
Have you ever felt love from an inanimate object like a painting or a building? I visited the Taj Mahal earlier this month. It is one of the seven wonders of the world because of it’s beauty. It is a testament to the, power of love. When you visit the Taj Mahal you feel the love for which it was intended.
The building was constructed to immortalize Emperor Shah Jahan’s love for his wife. So Love your neighbor as you love yourself, extend that love past the boundaries of your family and friends and the world will indeed be a better place to live.
The power of love in Hinduism
In, Hinduism, we see the, power of love, in the eternal love of Radha and Krishna has been the subject of great religious and philosophical imagery and is one of the foundational ethos of Hindu dharma.
The love of Radha and Krishna is not rooted in physicality. On the contrary it is allegorical. The Lord says “the mind that constantly remembers me, comes to dissolve and revel in me”. Radha is the personification of this deeply devoted mind. The pain of Radha’s separation from Krishna is the pain of the estranged soul searching for the embrace of the universal spirit. Radha is the individual and Krishna is the essence and objective of life.
Radha is always the chosen one, but when Radha realizes the pride of having the Supreme Lord all to herself was coloring her mind, he disappears from her heart. Krishna then multiplies himself to be present between every two Gopis. The Gopis are believed to represent thought waves.
The presence of Krishna between every two Gopis, symbolizes that the eternal truth exists everywhere, and it can be perceived by the true seeker even between two thought waves. Radha represents the purest and most beautiful amongst these divine thoughts and Krishna represents the supreme bliss that can be attained by dedicating one’s mind to the divine.
Buddhism is both simple and profound in the, power of love. On a daily basis it advocates watching the mind so that all thoughts, actions and words manifest a kind and compassionate attitude towards all others. It is the loving heart that places others above self. Herein lies the ultimate wisdom of existence. When you understand that the existence of all things, all beings, and all concepts is empty except in relation to other things, beings, and concepts, then you will be close to becoming awakened, crossing into a state of permanent happiness.
When you succeed in eliminating ignorance and replacing it with real wisdom, suffering comes to an end; because in understanding the true nature of existence you are no longer bound by the illusions of Samsara. It is Karma – the law of cause and effect- that gives life it’s moral code.
The Buddha thus advised doing everything to create good karma, for this has the power to propel you into a rebirth in circumstances that are conducive to practicing Dharma. Thereby having the chance to attain enlightenment. Practicing Dharma means showing generosity, having a good heart, purifying negative karma, and creating good karma. It also means embarking on a spiritual path that leads to enlightenment. (Excerp from The Buddha Book by Lillian Too.)
Daniel Mirfield discusses the importance of identifying and releasing, negative energy, in ourselves and others. He emphasizes the role of nature in healing and the need to connect with our intuition, stay grounded, and react from a place of peace and love. By recognizing and releasing negative energy, we can find, inner peace, and transform our lives.
Welcome back to the Transform Your Mind, Transform Your Life radio, podcast, and television show. I’m your host, Life coach Myrna Young. Today, we have a special guest, Daniel Mirfield, the author of “Seedling: The Journey to Inner Peace.” In this episode, we will be discussing how to identify the seeds of, negative energy, and release them. Negative energy, can have a profound impact on our lives, affecting our physical and, mental well-being. It is essential to learn how to recognize and release these negative energies to live a more peaceful and fulfilling life.
Daniel Mirfield is a renowned, energy healer, and mentor who channels the power of nature to help his clients heal and recover from stress. He is the author of “Seedling: The Journey to Inner Peace,” a book that combines ancient wisdom with modern times to help navigate and overcome challenging moments.
Understanding the source of negative energy
Daniel teaches that we can identify, negative energy, in ourselves and others and learn how to release it. He emphasizes the importance of understanding that the energies including, negative energy, we absorb are not just from our immediate surroundings but can also be inherited from past family members and traumatic experiences. By recognizing and addressing these, negative energies, we can break free from their control and live a life aligned with our true selves.
One of the key aspects of, releasing negative energy, is connecting with nature. Daniel channels the power of nature to help his clients heal and recover from stress. He believes that nature holds the answers to our healing and can help us navigate even the most challenging moments. By immersing ourselves in nature, we can ground ourselves, listen to our intuition, and find peace and love in the present moment.
To release, negative energy, Daniel suggests grounding ourselves and placing ourselves in a position of love. This can be done by walking barefoot, talking to trees, or simply being present in nature. By connecting with nature, we activate our feelings and senses, allowing us to release, negative energy, and embrace the healing power of the natural world.
In addition to connecting with nature, Daniel emphasizes the importance of meditation and self-reflection. He believes that meditation is a practice that can help us cultivate, inner peace, and connect with our, spiritual guides. By creating a space for self-reflection and meditation, we can clear our minds and open ourselves up to receive messages from our, spiritual guides. This practice allows us to tap into our, higher consciousness, and receive guidance and wisdom.
book seedling Journey to inner peace
The journey to inner peace
Daniel’s book, “Seedling: The Journey to Inner Peace,” is a practical guide to help readers identify and, release negative energy. It explores topics such as balancing energies, understanding triggers and addictions, and healing family DNA. The book is a channelled guide from Daniel’s, spiritual guides, and offers insights and wisdom to help readers on their own journey to, inner peace.
Here are 3 ways to balance your energy
Change food intake. Either increasing or decreasing food intake changes how much energy a person is taking in.
In conclusion, identifying and releasing, negative energy, is essential for our overall well-being and happiness. By connecting with nature, practicing meditation, and embracing self-reflection, we can, release negative energy, and, cultivate inner peace. Daniel’s book, “Seedling: The Journey to Inner Peace,” offers practical guidance and wisdom to help readers on their own path to healing and self-discovery. By embracing these practices and connecting with our true selves, we can live a life filled with love, harmony, and peace.
In a world where aspirations and motivations can vary significantly, it’s crucial to understand the distinction between being a “goal digger” and a “gold digger.” Both terms revolve around the pursuit of something valuable, but their intentions and paths diverge drastically.
In this blog, coach Myrna shares the difference between setting SMART goals with ambition, determination, and a desire to achieve your dreams with hard work and perseverance. Coach Myrna also explore the pitfalls of falling into the “gold digger” mindset – an approach driven by the pursuit of material wealth at the expense of genuine service and personal growth.
Do you chase money instead of goals? Being a, goal digger, means you are focusing on achieving your goals and pursuing your passions rather than solely chasing money. For example, do you want that job because you have a goal of being of service or you want that job because of the pay grade?
Take Life coaching for example, a lot of Life coaches can’t make a living doing this work but they love helping people so they willingly do the job.
Here are six tips to help you become a goal digger:
Define your goals: Take time to identify your long-term and short-term goals. What do you truly want to achieve in life? Having a clear vision will help you stay focused and motivated. It is also good to go deeper and have SMART goals.
These are SMART goals.
Specific: Spell out exactly what you want to accomplish
Begin by thinking about your goal as an observable action, not a broad concept. If your goal is vague, moving beyond this part of goal-setting is challenging. because it could be too generalized to measure or too wide-reaching to be attainable.
Measurable: Define the end result in quantitative or qualitative terms
How will you know when you have achieved your goal? Or how close you are to attaining it? Think about the outcomes and what can be measured. Knowing what success looks like will help you maintain the outcome of the goal, or set a baseline for future improvement.
Achievable: Confirm that your goal is possible and reasonable to accomplish
Do you have access to the skills and resources required to achieve your goal? What support or learning do you need to achieve it? Make sure you are set up to succeed when you establish your goal. This is a critical part of goal-setting.
Relevant: Make sure your goal is relevant for the future. AI is making a lot of jobs obsolete as computers did in the past. For example, writers are being phased out because AI can write a really good copy.
Time-bound: Identify an achievement date for your goal. Is it a long term or short-term goal? 6 months or 6 years? When does your goal need to be completed? A time-bound goal creates a sense of urgency. Even if the date identified isn’t the final deadline of the program or work, a time-bound goal helps to chart a course to completion.
Pursue your passions: Identify your interests and find ways to incorporate them into your goals. When you genuinely enjoy what you’re working towards, it becomes easier to stay committed and motivated.
Create a plan: Break down your goals into actionable steps. Develop a plan that outlines the specific tasks you need to complete to achieve each goal. This will help you stay organized and make progress.
Embrace learning and growth: Continuously seek opportunities to learn and develop new skills related to your goals. Invest in self-improvement, whether through books, courses, or mentorship. Constantly expanding your knowledge will enhance your ability to succeed.
Surround yourself with like-minded individuals: Connect with people who share similar goals or passions. Engaging with a supportive community can provide motivation, inspiration, and valuable insights.
Stay persistent and resilient: Achieving meaningful goals often requires perseverance. Be prepared for setbacks and challenges along the way. Learn from failures, adapt, and keep moving forward. Maintain a positive mindset and believe in your abilities.
Conclusion
Remember, while money can be a byproduct of achieving your goals, it should never be the sole focus. Stay true to your passions, work hard, and enjoy the journey of pursuing your dreams and being a, goal digger.
Is the secret to, Love, Sex? This week on Mindset Transformation Radio Podcast, I interview, Love Coach, James Green. James answers the question “Is, Sex, the most important factor in a relationship?
So, let me ask you. What do you think is the most important factor in a relationship? In my research for this interview. I found this article
on the secret to a long marriage. Hint it was not, Sex!
But in all seriousness. We have heard the phrase ” A Happy wife a happy life”
Here is another article about a couple married 79 years.
“Just want you to know that you’re still the one I would choose. Still the one I give my heart to, still the one I love.”
So, what’s their secret?
“To support one another, whatever the problems may be, good or bad. Stick together. That’s about it,” Bertha said.
“You know why this lasted 79 years? She has the last word,” Dan added with a smile.
Let me introduce my guest this week:
James is a certified Love and Emotional Intelligence coach. His mission is to teach people how to love themselves as well as love each other. James specialty is Relationship and Personal Development Coaching.
1. Question 1: Tell us of your journey to become a Love and emotional Intelligence coach. Do you have a personal story that made you specialize in this field?
I was a single parent and realized that when looking for a mate, I had to look for someone who would fit into my lifestyle as a single father. The woman had to accept me and my son as a package deal. That made me look at factors other than, Sex.
As far as my journey to becoming a Love and Emotional intelligence coach, I found I had the aptitude to reach people. People opened up to me. I remember once standing in the line at McDonald’s and this man in line started talking to me telling me his story. I decided to get my certification as a, Life Coach
2. Question 2: How does emotional intelligence fit into the relationship dynamics?
Emotional Intelligence is the ability to hear what your partner is not saying. It is the ability to realize that when your partner says Fine, I am okay with that. for example. She is not fine with that, from her tonality or her body language.
Another facet of emotional intelligence is the ability to keep your cool and not fly off the handle at the slightest provocation.
3. Question 3: What problems do find are the most common and how do you coach your clients to solve them?
I find Trust, Communication and the inability to seek out coaching until after they start experiencing problems.
Couples tend to think that coaching is not needed until there is a huge problem in their relationship and when I hear that I ask them do you also see a doctor AFTER you have Cancer?
4. Question 4: If you had a magic wand to solve common relationship problems, what would you solve?
If I had a magic wand to solve relationship problems, I would solve trust. Lack of trust is one of the most destructive elements in a relationship.
5. Question 5: When you say that relationship is not a 3-letter word, what do you mean?
The topic of our show today “Is the secret to love, Sex?”
Couples would have us believe that great sex keeps the relationship going or strong.
While sex is very important in a relationship it is not the most important factor.
I believe that communication is the most important factor.
Click the podcast link to hear from James directly as he answers this question.
6. Question 6: Why would you say that couples do not proactively seek relationship coaching and wait until there is a problem to get counselling?
Culture, conditioning. Women go to get an annual checkup every year. They get a PAP test to proactively check for any cervical problems. But this same woman would not think of going to a relationship coach to proactively check to see if her relationship is in danger of abnormal growth!
For the men I use the analogy of the oil change because men hate going to the doctor for an annual check up. But they do change their oil every 3 to 5 months. ( I had a laugh at this one. I asked James if he was suggesting men change their wife’s, as often as they change the oil in their cars?)
He assured me he was not saying that but letting the men know that just like the car engine their relationships need regular maintenance.
Tony Robbins also has lots of empowerment advice for couples.
Click the link below to understand how to create better relationships from Tony Robbins
If you are empowered to become a member of the Human Potential Movement and would like to be a guest on the Mindset Transformation radio show and podcast contact me.
For some people their, career, is closely interwoven with their, life purpose. Keshia Morris, is that person, Political Activist and Project Manager with Common Cause.
In this interview on the Transform your Mind radio hour and podcast, Life Coach and Mom Myrna Morris Young, trace the story of, Keshia Morris, as an undocumented alien, to her starting her career as a Psychologist, to getting a tug from God to transform her, career with purpose, to help with our democracy.
Listen to full interview here:
Introduction to a Career with Purpose
Keshia Morris is the project manager for the, Census 2020, with Common Cause and is getting a lot of media attention because of the Trump’s administration efforts to add the question “Are you a Citizen” to the, Census 2020.
Keshia Morris, talks about the importance of the Census, the reason the Trump administration was trying to add this question and, Common Cause, fight for a fair democracy.
The media attention started when, Keshia Morris, wrote an amazing article that was published in the Miami Herald that highlighted her, career, with purpose. In this article she talked about our personal journey to becoming permanent residents in the United States and why the question on the Census asking “Are you a Citizen?” would have a negative affect on our democracy.
After that article was published, several podcasts and radio personalities wanted to interview her.
Before we could get to what God has done in Keshia’s life as far as her chosen, career, with purpose. She chose me to be her mother. I knew from the moment she was conceived that she was born to do great things. She was conceived on my honeymoon and was born 9 months later on my 30th birthday. So even without being conscious I knew that she was born with a, life purpose.
Again without being yet conscious; but understanding the principle of generational increase, I started my journey to becoming an American Citizen. I believed that there were more opportunities for my children here in the USA.
Both my children are Canadian, and maybe my assumption was incorrect, but our perceptions become our reality.
Keshia Morris, went through high school as an, undocumented alien. The beauty of this country is that children didn’t require papers to go to public school until higher education. Without a vision, I could have sent her back to Canada to go to college; but that was not even a consideration. I paid out of state fees for her first 2 years of college. I could only afford one class; but she was in College.
I got married again in 2006 and my husband sponsored both of us, and we became permanent residents or documented immigrants.
Keshia received her BA and started out on her intended career as a Psychologist.
How Keshia’s Became On Purpose, career coaching
One day while listening to the audio book “A long walk to Freedom,” by Nelson Mandela, she had what is called a Damascus experience. Everything that was before was no more. So this is where I want to pick up the story.
I want to start off by saying that you tell my story so much better than I do. Just laying out for our listeners how I got to the moment where I decided I wanted to do something new with my career. I had always thought that I that I was going to be a psychologist. As a child people kept telling me that oh you know you’re great at giving people advice, so I thought I might as well make a career out of this and try to achieve the American dream.
Psychologists make a lot of money. I started getting into listening to audio books in my car and as I listening to Nelson Mandela’s “A long walk to freedom” I would say in the very first few chapters of the book, I feel like it changed me and changed my trajectory of my life almost immediately. It was also the time of the sequester where the government was shut down. I interpreted this as wealthy special interests groups were getting in the way of government and our lawmakers not being able to do their jobs. I didn’t feel like this was right, so I felt an extreme tug to try to do something about it.
I had already invested over 4 years as a Psychology major and started with my masters degree credits which were not inexpensive. I had already amassed about $30,000 in student loans before listening to Nelson Mandela’s book. I felt an immense tug from God that becoming a political activist was my, career purpose, I wanted to help change the democracy the United States of America.
How to look for signs that your, career, is on Purpose
Question #2: How did you know that this was God. What were the signs?
I knew it was God because it changed the trajectory of my life in seconds. I was now a new woman and had a firm grasp on what my, career, should be.
Things lined up for you. I was a new Life Coach at the time and you requested a coaching session. I remember it, like it was yesterday. Because what I said out loud was not what I was thinking. I told you to go for it. To make a plan and pursue this goal.
Before graduation you got an internship at your number 1 choice for employment, Common Cause,
You received a job offer with, Common Cause, immediately after graduation. So we know that you were on, career purpose, because God opened doors.
Why family support and career coaching is so important to your career
Question # 3: What advice would you give our listeners who face obstacles. No family support, not accepted to schools, kids at home etc.
I would tell them to believe in the vision that you can have it all. Believe in yourself, believe in God and believe in their, career purpose,
Keshia Morris, you are getting National attention now as the Project Manager for the 2020 Census at Common Cause. The Trump administration has been very unfriendly towards immigrants and, undocumented aliens, and intended to use the question “Are you a Citizen?” on the, Census 2020, to instill fear to the non-Citizens, so as to set up, Gerrymandering. Common Cause fought for this question to be removed from the Census and won.
Question # 4 Please explain the importance of having this question removed from the, Census 2020, and what exactly the Census does for our democracy.
Gerrymandering is manipulating districts to give one party advantage over the other. We have definitely seen a lot of gerrymandering being done by Republicans; but we do absolutely know that Democrats do it as well.
The Constitution mandates that a Census or accounts of all people that live within these United States be counted for apportionment purposes every ten years. So every ten years the Census Bureau takes counts of everyone that lives here. That is including illegal aliens, that is including children and newborns. Everyone should get counted.
What this count does for our democracy is it apportioned the amount of seats in Congress.
There are 435 seats and the House of Representatives and those 435 seats are distributed based on population size. Right now about each congressional district has about 700,000 people.
In a State like Florida, for example that has a population of maybe six to nine million people, but say only eight million people were counted in the, 2020 census, that means that Florida would get less congressional representation than it actually truly deserves because one million people were not counted.
The Trump administration wanted to add this last minute question “Are you a Citizen” to the, Census 2020, I say last minute because usually each question is tested and vetted thoroughly for about three years before a question can be added to the census. It has to go through Congress and an approval processes. The Trump administration came in and decided they were not gonna do any of that, and just announced that they were going to add this question to the, Census 2020,
Census Bureau researchers have found that if this question were to be added to the, Census 2020, about 6.5 million people would not answer the census form and thus insure a fair census. So advocates like, Common Cause, but really across the board, millions of people stood up and said that this is wrong. Common Cause, took the case all the way to the Supreme Court and the Supreme Court sided with us. They said that the Trump administration cannot add this question to the, Census 2020, they called the reason the Trump administration gave to add this question, contrived.
Myrna: I heard you say in one of your interviews that the data that comes from the, Census 2020, is confidential and it’s illegal for anybody to use this information for harm to the people. I know you said that if this question was on the, Census 2020, 6.5 million people would not have answered because they might be afraid that someone will come to their door. But what you said is that information is never presented in such a way that somebody can know who filled out the form, and if they were going to actually use information from the data, they will use the information as a collective.
I am curious as to why research shows that 6.5 million people WOULD NOT have responded to the, Census 2020, if the question “Are you a Citizen” was on the form?
Keshia Morris: My answer to that question is twofold.
The law states that your responses on the census cannot be used to cause harm to any person. That means that it can’t be sent to ICE to enforce immigration law. It can’t even be sent to your landlord if you have too many people living in in your household. However, what the Trump administration wanted to do, was to create fear. That information isn’t always communicated correctly and even if it was, people don’t trust that the Trump administration would follow the law.
So it’s better just not to have the question on the, Census 2020, whatsoever.
The Trump administration has given up on their efforts to add the question “Are you a Citizen” on Census 2020, but they are now trying another way to get this information. President Trump has now issued an executive order to get administrative data to be collected for the purpose of redistricting. Common Cause, is fighting for this not to be the case, and it absolutely will be challenged through litigation.
Facts about the, Census 2020,
Section 2 of the Constitution requires a count every 10 years of every person residing in the United States—citizens and non-citizens, newborns and seniors, documented and undocumented, homeowners, renters, and the homeless. The, 2020 Census, will be in full swing during the Winter, Spring and Summer of 2020.
Counting hundreds of millions of people is an immense undertaking, and it’s critical for state legislators to start preparing now. Census data determine the allocation of more than $800 billion in annual federal funding and are often used in state and local policy-making, decision- making, and research. An inaccurate census in 2020 would jeopardize state funds for over 300 federal programs and compromise crucial supports for marginalized communities.
Census data are also used for the reapportionment and redistricting processes and therefore vital to advancing a fair and representative democracy. Ensuring that all residents in your state are counted will require funding, coordination, and commitment from policymakers but will provide your constituents the resources and representation they deserve.
Research shows that if the question “Are you a Citizen” was on the, Census 2020, 6.5 million people would not fill in the Census thereby states would be unrepresented by millions in congress.
Myrna: From listening to all your numerous interviews I will list them. I have learned that the Census data is confidential and it is illegal for anyone to use that data to target aliens.
Myrna: I have had a front row seat to your growth from a Psychology major into a political activist. I have watched you take the mike and rally a crowd. I have listened you spout very technical data about the history of our democracy with names and dates of legal documents. As your mother, I am impressed by your transformation.
Question # 6: Take us through how you released your fear of public speaking. What did you do to get yourself from this abstract fear of speaking and communicating to what you do now?
I am still working on being an effective communicator and working past my fear. My fear has lessened a bit, there was a time where I mean I couldn’t get in front of people and I couldn’t say two words without my voice shaking, without saying um a hundred times, without looking completely lost. So yeah I definitely think that I have I’ve experienced some growth and really all I can say, well the main thing I can say that got me around the corner is practice.
There’s that Malcolm Gladwell books that says you need like 10,000 hours of practicing something to be an Expert. You just named a bunch of the interviews that I’ve done; but you know each of those interviews requests, I started off by saying NO. because the fear is still there. But I able to overcome the fear by resting in the fact that this is for a, life purpose, and I am working towards the goal of having this democracy be the best that it can be.
As we wrap up our show today, I want to leave you with these thoughts.
There is a difference between living an active life and a, purpose driven life. We all lead active lives. To be active does not mean we even have to physically do anything. We could be mentally active and be making plans and, setting goals, etc. but not going anywhere. But when we are living a, purpose driven life, our energy and activities has a, life purpose, and meaning. Pause to reflect the purpose of your chosen, career. What is the meaning of your, career, purpose. What is the quality of the energy you are expending. When you have a, career, of purpose, the more energy you expend, the more renewed you are. On the other hand, when you are not on, life purpose, the energy you expend is not renewed, instead you end your day depleted and diminished.
A, purpose driven life, and, purpose driven career, alters the course of history. I hope you all find yours.
Keshia Morris, one final question What do you want your contribution to be to God’s Kingdom?
To make this country’s democracy the best it can be, that is my, career purpose,
How can any of our listeners get in contact with common cause to support the organization, volunteer for the census or reach you for speaking engagements or interviews?
Self sabotaging behaviors, move us in the opposite direction from our goals. When we understand the patterns that underlie, self sabotage, we begin to free ourselves.
We then begin to allow ourselves to interact with ourselves and the world with greater success, joy, and fulfillment. The process of breaking through denial, facing your fear, anger, and other difficult emotions, and making peace with your pain, leads to an ending of the internal war with yourself.
You can step fully into the greatest expression of yourself. Finding the wisdom inside the wounds you’ve endured is one of the most important conversations you’ll ever have with yourself about, self sabotage, because on the other side of it is the emotional freedom and depth of joy that you were born to have.
Introduction to, Self Sabotaging Behaviors
In this interview Sabrina Johnson, inspirational Speaker and Author, talks on how she overcame different aspects of, self sabotaging behaviors, because of her lack of self confidence and negative self talk. Overcoming, Self Sabotage, and taking Inventory of your failures is one way to stop, self defeating behavior.
Whatever form it takes – whether, self sabotaging behaviors, or limiting thought patterns; self sabotage, always diminishes the passion and energy we need to fulfill our dreams. At the heart of the matter, it is possible to create as much love, fulfillment, success and joy as we feel worthy of having. By identifying how your inner saboteur is, self sabotaging, your life, you can make radical progress toward that which you want.
Overcoming, Self Defeating, behavior by changing your Mindset
Mindsets are beliefs – beliefs about yourself and your most basic qualities.
Think about your intelligence, your talents, your personality. Are these qualities simply fixed traits, carved in stone or can you cultivate and grow these traits?
Your intelligence is not a fixed quantity which cannot be increased. With practice, training, and above all method, we can increase our attention, our memory, our judgment and become more intelligent than we were before.
In a, Fixed Mindset, people believe their basic qualities, like their intelligence or talent, are simply fixed traits thus the, self defeating, behavior
In a Growth Mindset, people believe that their most basic abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work.
The, Fixed Mindset, is a, Defeated Mindset
The, fixed mindset, creates an internal dialogue that is focused on judging. e.g
“I am a loser”
“I am the giver in this relationship and I get nothing in return”
“I am a no good husband”
“My partner is selfish only thinks about himself”
People with a, growth mindset, are sensitive to positive and negative information; but they’re attuned to its implications for learning and growing. They ask themselves “What can I learn from this” How can I improve “How can I help my partner do better.
Self sabotage
How to Overcome, Self Sabotage, at Work
I have always been someone who spent years trying to move my life forward I always say that I am a dreamer; but the problem was I made decisions and choices in my life that counteracted that data. I told myself I wanted to move forward; but everything that I did was, self sabotage, my behavior caused me to move backwards.
If I stopped and did an honest self-assessment and really seek God for direction on what am I needed to do. I would figure out why I was seemingly repeating the same, self sabotaging, cycles in my life. It was at that point that I began to really recognize certain, defeated mindsets, or negative truth about myself that I held about myself subconsciously that was preventing me from moving forward and continuing these, self defeating behaviors.
For instance I’ll give you an example. I am very career-driven, so I desire to move up the career ladder. I have a master’s degree in marketing; but whenever I went to apply for a director level or VP level positions, I get intimidated and, self sabotage, by talking myself out of applying for that position. I would apply and start working at a lower position and then the next couple of months I’m miserable.
Inevitably my employer would see in me what I couldn’t see in myself and they would give me more responsibility. Then I would complain about being overworked and underpaid. My, defeated mindset, would make me, self sabotage, and take a lower position than I was qualified for. Then I would leave these jobs because it wasn’t what I wanted and then the cycle would begin all over again at another company.
I had to say OK God I need your help. Give me the courage to jump in even though I felt fear.
Myrna: Let me not skip over this huge opportunity to ask you Sabrina. Since you’ve done whole bunch of self-assessments, why did you have a, defeated mindset, and, self sabotage, yourself all those years? Why did you not have confidence in your abilities?
Sabrina: That is a great question Myrna, and that was something I had to really pinpoint. I was listening to a speaker and he said when you lack self-confidence, somewhere along the line in your life someone fed into your mind that you were not good enough. That you were not worthy enough. I started looking back on past unhealthy relationships and past hurts and start to really connect the guys who rejected me. Hurts from past relationships.
I had to rely on my faith and ask God for guidance. Outside of that I read a lot of self-help books and articles on how to overcome a, defeated mindset, how to build your confidence and how to speak with confidence; but a lot of it, the core of it really has to go back to the words that I was speaking to myself. So when I started to get intimidated by the Job description, I would remind myself that I have done this job in the past. You’re not going to take a different role in the company then do this job and not get paid for it. I started being my own cheerleader.
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Become aware of your emotions. Your emotions are the language of your body.
Change your emotions by thinking of want you want. Eg. You have applied for a promotion 2 times now and you keep being passed over. A, defeated mindset, says I am never going to get this job I had better get used to this and begin to, self sabotage, Instead imagine yourself in this new position. Feel in your body how it would feel to sit at that desk with your name on the door.
Your emotions will change and so will your body. It believes it is living in the future now.
Sexy total health, is not about how you look on the outside but on the inside. When you become conscious of these secrets, you embody, total health care.
When you become conscious of nature, mental health, presence and spirituality you have, sexy total health.
In this episode of the Transform your Mind radio and podcast, Host Myrna Young, Life Coach, interviews UDO ERASMUS, founder of Udo’s Choice, author of the book Fats and Oils: The Complete Guide to Fats and Oils in Health and Nutrition and Total Sexy Health. Udo shares his 8 secrets to Sexy, Total Health.
Udo: I can remember the fear the anxiety I had as a child growing up during the second world war in Europe, Sometimes you will hear me say that I was born in hell; and with a lot of help from visible and invisible friends, walked a long crooked path from there to heaven. I became a good reader of adventure stories, to escape hell even in the mind.
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As I grew older, along the way, I tried out many things and learned a lot. Every trade and job, every movement or breath and every step led me to the next turn on the path to find new, different and out-of-the-box possibilities.
I discovered that just like you take time to go to the bathroom, or time for breakfast everyday, you should take time to create awareness. Go back inside to the core of your being, to the magnificence of your soul.
You are not your body, you are the owner of the of your body.
That is why I created, Sexy Total Health.
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My question to you is, how much time do you spend with the owner of your body to create, total health?
Myrna: Interestingly, I was listening to Dr Deepak Chopra on Facebook live this morning and he was teaching about communing with nature and negative ions from plants and trees. I started touching shrubs as I passed them in the park on my morning walk. I am seeking sexy, total health, myself.
Udo: After searching for purpose for several years, I took a job as a pesticide sprayer and ended up with pesticide poisoning. Trying to cure myself, I started studying oils and fats. Frying your foods in oil is associated with all kinds of problems including diabetes, inflammatory diseases like arthritis, and also with cardiovascular problems. So I developed a method for making them under protection from oxygen and heat. Oils are the most sensitive and therefore most easily damaged of the essential nutrients. Light, oxygen in the air, and high temperature damage them, and then they damage your body.
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Did you get enough of the omega-3 or Flaxseed oil in your diet? 99% of the population don’t get enough omega-3 needed for, total health care,
Total health, is more than just using the right oils, actually everything affects your, total health. For example your politics affect your, total health. if there’s something going on that isn’t right with the heart or right with, total health care, then it stresses you out.
How active you are affect your sexy, total health, the water you drink affect your, total health, but we focus mostly on on the interaction with the world. Our kids, our employer, the religious system, or the educational system, or the political system. Our awareness does not go inside.
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Here are the 8 Secrets of Sexy Total Health
Digestion – EXCESS CARBOHYDRATES TURN OFF YOUR FAT BURNING GENES. Since excess carbohydrates (eating more of them than your body burns) can cause many health problems, it is only logical, practical and important that your body makes sure that you burn carbohydrates first.
Nutrition – Fats and oils come in two completely contradictory forms. There are fats/oils that heal, and there are fats/oils that kill. The truth is that to make good choices for better health, you have to know which is which, and then choose the fats/oils that heal. More physical health problems come from bad (damaged) oils than from any other part of nutrition. Knowing how to use oils is essential to sexy, total health.
Mental health – Becoming aware of being aware, you discover both the calm stillness that is awareness’ nature, and everything else that unfolds in that stillness. Real, true, personal peace and mental health has its roots in the core of your existence beyond your senses. With that awareness, you can solve the challenges and conflicts within you and surrounding you. Mental health is essential to, total health.
Presence – Presence underpins your essence and being. Your emptiness is not empty. It’s filled with your undiscovered magnificence and the precursor to sexy, total health. Don’t get stuck in the words. Words only point at essence; they are not essence. Let them float in the space of your being, and become aware of that space in you.
Consciousness – Consciousness is the field physicists call God. Consciousness is everywhere. It is omnipresent, in charge of everything going on in the entire universe.
Emotional awareness – Lack of awareness of your internal foundation begins your problems. Awareness of that internal foundation makes practical solutions to your problems available and accessible. Aware and focused in stillness, you find insights and knowledge. Stillness is the only known reliable practice for deepening insights. They are your best source of power, wisdom and manifestation. Live your life focused. Be focused in the present, which contains all that exists. Nothing is more powerful than the present moment.
Natural living – clean water, clean food, clean air and being in nature
Sleep – is Life Energy it inspires creativity and necessary for sexy, total health.
Download your FREE copy of Total Sexy Health Here:
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Are you Happy? Today Dr Ahia, Psychologist and I discuss, How to be Happy. Their is a mathematical formula for, happiness. H=S +C + V i.e. means Your happiness is based on your set point. What are the conditions that make you happy. Are you choosing to make the voluntary choices to make to be happy.
The, happiness formula, is a mathematical equation on, how to be happy.
What does it take to be happy?
To answer that question you have to understand your blueprint for, happiness.
Your blueprint is the story you have in your head about how life is supposed to be.
The most popular archetype is the blueprint that says you have to be successful to find, happiness.
Here is a Test to see your Capacity for, Happiness:
What is an area in your life that you feel happy about?
Then ask yourself, why are you happy with that area?
You could find, happiness, in your body, your marriage, your career, your friends, your finances, your kids, your relationship with God etc.
If your Life Conditions or LC match your blueprint for, happiness, you will find, happiness, in this area.
Let’s pick an easy one to see, how to be happy, I am sure you know people who are happy with being overweight.
They find, happiness, with their body because their blueprint says, Big is Beautiful. They love being Big. You may also know someone who is a twig and they feel fat. You become unhappy with your body when you step on the scale and it is different than your blueprint for, happiness, with your weight or body.
While you are in this space you can also get clarity on why you are Unhappy with some areas of your life.
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The Happiness Formula, How to be Happy
Happiness, is defined as a feeling of contentment, that life is as it should be. Perfect, happiness, comes when you have all your needs met according to your blueprint of what life should be.
Here is the formula for, Happiness
H=S +C + V
Happiness is “H”
S – Set point or genetic capacity for happiness
C- Conditions or circumstances of living
V – Voluntary choices
Your Set point or core belief is both genetic and environmental. Do you see life as an opportunity or do you see life as a problem?
Your set point for, happiness, is determined in the first 3 years of life by parents or caretakers. Your neurons mirror your parents. If your parents were always criticizing each other or playing the victim; that’s what you grow up to be. A critical person always seeing the glass as half empty instead of half full. You feel victimized by life. You blame the system for your lack of, happiness, in life. You feel you were born on the other side of the tracks.
On the other hand If your parents were happy, then you grew up thinking that life is a place for service and to look for the silver lining under every cloud. Never being the victim because victims have no power. Your set point on, how to be happy, if pretty high.
Your set point represents 50% of your, happiness, so if you have a negative set point, you are always fighting an uphill battle.
Fortunately, your set point for, happiness, can be changed through therapy?
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The second factor in the, Happiness Formula is your capacity for happiness or your Life Conditions “C”
C = Conditions of living – conditions of living represents 10 -12% of your, happiness. For example If you are extremely poor you can’t be happy because your basic needs are not being met and your poverty becomes a source of stress.
There is a movie I saw years ago called the, Happiness, movie. It showcased people in India living in very poor conditions, earning something like $100 per year and they found, happiness.
How to be happy, they had love, they had family and since poverty is what they knew from birth, their blueprint for, happiness, was different than someone born into wealth.
Do you know poor people who are happy? I am sure you do.
When your Life conditions don’t match your blueprint that is when you suffer. Stress, depression, substance abuse this is the doorway they enter from. Not always but most times.
The next leg on, How to be Happy, is “V”
V = Voluntary Choices. These are the choices you make every day =these choices represent 40% of your, happiness.
If your choices are all about personal pleasure then your, happiness, will be transient.
In the US the #1 choice for personal pleasure is shopping
#2 is alcohol and food
# 3 sex
When you make choices for personal pleasure your, happiness, lasts a few days or a few months at best. If you are trying to find, happiness, by acquiring things like cars, clothes, houses, jewelry. The, happiness, lasts a few weeks or at best 6 months then it is no longer a source of joy.
This is the same for alcohol, food, drugs, sex.
Lasting, Happiness, does not come from external sources.
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If you are suffering in your marriage, your relationships, or anything other than your health, you can change your blueprint and find, happiness. If you feel you have no control to change your Life conditions, that is when there is pain.
You can change your set point through meditation and expanding your consciousness.
If you don’t like your conditions of living or your body, change it. It is in your control. If you don’t want to change your conditions then you must change your blueprint.
When I first got married my husband and I fought constantly. We had different blueprints of what marriage was supposed to be. We are still together today because we both changed our blueprints. Most couples end up in divorce court because they refuse to change their blueprint of what it take to find, happiness, in a marriage or after a divorce.
Instead of making the choice of personal pleasure, spend your money or time on experiences like vacations, adventure, entertainment, being social with friends etc. Creating Good memories make you happy.
The fastest way to, happiness, is to give others attention, appreciation, acknowledgment, affection, or acceptance.
Before you make choices, ask yourself would this choice make me happy? Will it make others happy? You cannot find, happiness, making others unhappy.
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So What is, self- confidence? How do we define, self- confidence, and what does it look like?
Self-confidence, comes from building your confidence muscle. It increases with positive input from your parents, peers, loved ones and from your personal victories.
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In Today’s #podcast Arifah and I are talking on the topic of How to build, Self-confidence, we want to shed some light on one of the top struggles of , African American women, self-confidence,
In the co-host chair today is registered, social worker and mental health counselor, Ms Arifah Yusuf.
What is Self-Confidence?
The most important thing to remember about, self- confidence, is that we were born with it. It is our natural state.
How many of you remember your play days as kids? As a child I was always the doctor or teacher.
Boys have no fear. They would climb to the tallest point in their home, put on a cape and jump! They were Superman!
So I would define, self- confidence, as certainty. Confident and certain that you are able to handle your job, your family, social events and personal relationships.
Self-confidence, comes from building your confidence muscle. It increases with positive input from your parents, peers, loved ones and from your personal victories.
But a large percentage of, African American women, and men suffer from a lack of, self-confidence, because of negative input from parents, peers, and loved ones.
Usually centered on their intellect, the color of their skin, their hair, their lips, their butt, the section of town they live, their lack of designer clothing, and the list goes on.
It is important to note that lack of, self-confidence, always comes from negative comments that you believe. If you don’t let these negative comments in, they will never take root and grow.
Here is a story showcasing how a lack of, self-confidence, usually starts.
A surgeon opened his office one day and found a tall black man in the waiting room. He was six feet four inches tall and towered over the surgeon. He complained about his lip. You see his underlip protruded out from his top lip. His girlfriend told him she was ashamed to be seen in public with him because of his ugly lip; so he came to the surgeon to get it fixed.
The surgeon told him there was nothing wrong with his lip, it was just a minor protrusion. The black man insisted on getting it fixed; so the surgeon gave him an outrageous price of $1200 hoping he would go away.
He did, he said that he didn’t have that kind of money. But lo and behold, he came back the next day with a little black bag in his hand. He dumped the contents on the table. Bills poured out, his life savings; $1200 worth!
The doctor was shocked. He didn’t want to deprive the man of his life savings so he made him an offer. He agreed to do the surgery for a smaller fee on the condition that he tell his lady love that he paid $1200 for the surgery.
The operation was simple enough and one week later all the bandages came off and the man had a smaller lip he was proud of. All the surgery was done inside the lip so he had no visible scars except for a small scar inside the lip. The man was happy, he strode from the doctor’s office full of, self-confidence, A commanding figure. Tall, black and proud.
However a few weeks later he was back in the surgeon’s office. His body seemed to have shrunk, his hands lost their strength, his voice squeaked. The doctor asked him what happened to him.
He said “the African Bug, sir. It got me and it’s killing me”
He told the doctor after he removed the bandages he went to see his lady love. She loved his lip and asked him how much he paid for the surgery. When he told her $1200, she became enraged and cursed him saying she could have used that $1200 and accused him of hiding the money from her. She cursed him and told him he would die.
Deeply troubled and hurt, the man laid in his bed for 4 days worrying about this curse that was going to kill him. Then running his tongue around, he discovered the horrible thing inside his mouth. He went to see a medical doctor who checked his mouth and confirmed that “the slimy African bug was stuck inside his mouth and it was indeed killing him.
The surgeon looked at this diminished and fearful man and asked him “Is it really in your mouth?”
“Yes sir,” the man said “the doctor tried to help get rid of it with liquids, pastes and potions – but nothing worked. The curse is too strong”. It’s burned inside my lip.
“Your lip?”
“Yes sir” the man said
“You didn’t say lip before”
The doctor ran his finger at the back of the man’s lip and told the disbelieving man that “the bug” was no more than scar tissue from his surgery.
The disbelieving man looked up in wonder and asked “then there is no African bug?”
The man stood up. Instantly he seemed to have regained his full height and strength. A rich smile spread over his face and his voice boomed out again. His, self-confidence, had returned.
The moral of this story is that you can’t get your, self-confidence, from other people. You have to take inventory of your strengths and weaknesses and deal with them on your own terms.
Let’s bring Arifah into this, self-confidence, conversation. Arifah is a, registered social worker, specializing in, mental health issues. She is the founder and program director of Lifted by Purpose.
Lifted by Purpose Provides a diverse range of services including training, workshops with the intent to engage youth in conversations about mental health and learn practical strategies to cope with life stressors.
Arifah I am sure that a large population of your clients suffer from a lack of, self-confidence, Why do you think that is?
I think there are many reasons young people lack, self-confidence, I often work with young people who experienced unhappy childhoods or maybe their parents neglected them in some way or they weren’t involved much in their lives.
Also I’d say lack of, self -confidence, sometimes comes from negative input from teachers or authority figures in their lives. Sometimes teachers have a way of saying things that discourage young people. Making them feel inadequate made and like they couldn’t be successful. That kind of influenced how they feel about themselves and their, self-confidence, I’d also say young people who have experienced trauma or bullying from their peers can obviously influence their, self-confidence,
I believe that when young people don’t value themselves and sometimes that comes from people not validating them, they often lack, self-confidence,
How to Build Your Self-Confidence through Courageous acts
As a, life coach, I believe that Courage is a byproduct of, self confidence,
It takes courage to walk up on stage and speak to an audience large or small.
It takes courage to call that guy you like and ask him out.
It takes courage to go into that interview even though you have no idea what you are going to say.
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So how do you make yourself, Face the Fear, but do it anyway?
Tell yourself that it is not going to kill you.
My grandmother used to say “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”
And that’s exactly what, Feeling the fear but doing it anyway does for you. It makes you stronger, it builds your, self-confidence, muscle because even if you bombed you got practice and practice also makes perfect!
Here are my steps to build your, self-confidence, muscle on public speaking or doing a presentation at work.
You can start by writing out your speech word for word and just read it
Then as you get more, self- confidence, and your brain recorded that you did not die, you weren’t booed off the stage, nobody laughed at you.
So the next step is to write out the headlines and speak from the heart on your headlines
Sooner or later you will have, self- confidence, muscles like Arnold Schwarzenegger or Tony Robbins and command the attention of the audience.
Arifah What are your steps to building the, self-confidence, muscle?
I find that it wasn’t only their, self-confidence muscle, that needed to be built up, it was their self-worth, it was a whole bunch of things there was all built into the one thing. If we were to put a label on it, it would be that we’re not enough.
You would not believe how many people feel that they are not enough; even the most successful
people like, Michelle Obama, in her book “Becoming Michelle Obama” felt that she wasn’t good enough. Why did she feel that way? Because she was black and from the south side of Chicago!
As, African American women, we have got a lot of things that we have to deal with, we just have to believe that we are all born with purpose and with the love of God.
I have seven steps that I use to help my clients gain, self-confidence:
Self-reflection – every time I meet with them, I allow them to self-reflect on their day self-reflect on things that were happening in their lives with gratitude.
Acknowledgement and self-acceptance – what makes them unique because everybody is unique.
Positive reinforcement – praising their effort and not obsessing over mistakes.
Mastering a skill – I had the girls work on a project. They created their own YouTube video. Everyone mastered a skill in the production of the video.
Communication skills – I do a lot of exercises around different forms of communication. Assertiveness, passive, passive aggressive etc.
Positive self-talk and affirmations – paying attention to their internal dialogue
Pay it forward – giving back helps build, self-confidence,
To listen to the full Podcast audio, download on your favorite podcast player.
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Childhood Abuse, has continually been linked to substance abuse for women. In this Episode we look at, Drug and Alcohol treatments, for women with trauma, who were abused by men and parents during childhood.
She has been recognized as a champion of woman’s issues. Particularly women who have struggled to maintain a positive balance in their lives despite addiction. As the Therapist for women in Rehab for over 30 years, Dr Ahia was responsible for the, drug and alcohol treatments for women with trauma, who turned to substance abuse to as a means to cope with trauma.
Her work in, addiction and recovery, began some thirty years ago and has empowered thousands of women as they transitioned to a healthy place in their lives. Dr Ahia’s research has been a motivating force in moving many broken women away from the men in their lives that lead them down the path of destruction, confusion, and addiction to a place where they are whole mentally, physically and emotionally with, drug and alcohol treatments.
In the book “Call me an Addict” Dr Ahia tells the brutal stories of 3 women. We will look at one of these women on the blog and podcast on the, Transform Your Mind radio and Podcast with Life Coach Myrna Young.
This is a summary Kelly’s story in the Book “Call me an Addict”
Kelly’s first memory at 2 years old was her father punching her in the face for not eating her food. Then she remembered at 5 years old taking her father’s fingers as she sat on his lap with his friends and sticking them in her vagina!
That was the start of her life that included sex with her father, an alcoholic and abusive mother, promiscuity with men at age 14.
At age 15 her parents gave her away to her boyfriend and moved to another city. She had her first child soon after and was homeless because the boyfriend also moved away to another city and left her to look after a child with no home and no income.
Another man gave her a place to live in return for sex. He ended up marrying her and they had 3 more kids.
Her abuse resulted in her abuse of alcohol and rehab. Her, drug and alcohol treatments for women with trauma, was not successful. She continued to relapse.
Kelly started drinking heavily at 14 years old and used it for escape. It was drinking, sex, and prostitution.
Her story ended with her kids being placed in the custody of child protective services and she being placed in rehab for the 3rd time.
What was so sobering to me hearing this story was how 3 generations were ruined from addictions. Kelly’s father and mother were both addicts. She hated them both. She became an addict and then her eldest daughter followed her lifestyle. One of the most profound statements in the story to me was when Kelly said she and her daughter would fight all the time about who was the bigger whore!
As a Life Coach and survivor of child sexual abuse, I can say that the reason my life didn’t spin out of control like Kelly’s was because even before I knew anything about mindset and the power of intention, I wanted respect. I did not want to be known as a Bad Girl or whore. A girl who is free with sex and all the boys talk about her.
Kidtasks – the application of good deeds now available on Google Aps.
Kidtasks is an organizer for your children’s daily routines, but it is good for the entire family.
This is how it works.
1) Parents create a list of tasks. It could be as simple as “feed your pet”, “brush your teeth”, “water the plants”, “do the dishes”, etc.
Parents you can even rate each task in points.
2) Family members do the tasks on the list and get points!
3) Parents set your own exchange rate. Eg 1 point may be equal to 1$. Having collected a certain amount of points, the children may ask their parents for their “salary” for their work!
Why this AP useful for PARENTS: Because it will help to give Kids a sense of responsibility and prepare them for the things they need to do when they become older.
Why this AP is useful for CHILDREN: Children will be rewarded when they help out with chores around the house! They will have the opportunity to get a “salary” or pocket money in exchange for working on their tasks.
Parents, this AP will teach your children responsibility and reward them in the process. To download this AP head over to Google Aps and search for Kidtasks that’s K-I-D-T-A-S-K-S.
In my book “Out of the Snares, a story of Hope and Encouragement”, I share a similar story about my molester fingering me in his car as he drove me to school. I had the mindset to become a player in this game of life and not become a victim. You see victims have no power. Like Kelly she was powerless to stop her father from molesting her. In fact, another sobering part of her story was when she told her father “No” and he returned with the handle of a mop and stuck it up her ass. He told her with that move that she was nothing more than his bitch and he could do with her anything he wanted.
Women are placed in Rehab facilities either by the Police, their families or sometimes they walk in on their own accord
Rehab facilities are an intensive in house process
As the in house Therapist my job was to administer, drug and alcohol treatments to these women with trauma, by helping them to learn from their addictions.
These Therapy sessions were conducted one on one and their, drug and alcohol treatments, were first understanding how they got to that point in their lives.
They first had to accept that they were addicts
These, drug and alcohol treatments for women with trauma, were 30 days to 6 months and sometimes even years
Most people including families do not understand that, drug and alcohol treatments for women with trauma, were not miracle drugs, these women were trying to get over abuse from their childhood. They can’t be cured in 6 months when they had these traumas for 10, 20 even 30 years.
After the intensive in house, addiction and recovery, treatments these women continue their, drug and alcohol treatments for women with trauma, in an half way house for about one year. In this house they are expected to remain clean, get jobs, practice self love and self care and become contributing members to their community.
For more information on Dr Tra Ahia’s work and to pick up a copy of her book visit her on the web at www.forlifeservices-cc-com
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Here are some of the Symptoms from Childhood Sexual Trauma Resulting in Addiction.
PTSD is a mental health condition triggered by a traumatic event. Symptoms can emerge months or even years after the sexual trauma. Some common symptoms of PTSD include flashbacks, nightmares, intense distress when exposed to sights, sounds, or smells that trigger memories of the trauma, and bodily reactions when reminded of the trauma.
Dissociation
Dissociation, often associated with PTSD, is feeling disconnected or dissociated from one’s body. It can affect a person’s ability to focus, concentrate and function for periods of time. In an effort to detach from the sexual trauma, people learn to numb themselves from the pain. Dissociation is often referred to as avoidance coping, because survivors use it as a mechanism to escape and pull away from their past.
The Road to Recovery
The recovery from sexual trauma is a healing journey that takes time. Children who have been traumatized by sexual abuse often report feelings such as shame, terror, depression, and guilt. They often blame themselves for the abuse. Although drugs and alcohol can give survivors a moment of reprieve, there are dangerous risks and high costs to that emotional escape.
Sexual abuse not only leaves emotional and psychological scars, but it can lead to dangerous risk-taking behaviors, like using drugs. Substances are only a temporary fix and they can’t erase the past. Fortunately, dark moments don’t have to last, and drugs don’t have to cover unhealed wounds. Survivors can learn healthy coping skills and become a beacon of encouragement and hope to other youth who travel a similar path toward healing.
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Additional Resources for Drug and Alcohol Treatments for Women with Trauma
