How to set Goals like a Champion

How to Set Strong Goals

As Millennials graduate from high school, graduate from college, or get engaged to be married, A formula on, How to Set  Goals,  should be prominent their minds.

In each stage of life, we should have short term goals and long-term goals. Short term goal are goals you would like to achieve within the year and long-term goals are goals you would like to achieve in let’s say 10 years.

So if we were to pick up goals at a Millennial graduation from College, we should teach her, how to set goals, both  short term goals and long term goals. This would probably be  get a job and start supporting herself or enroll in higher education.

Deezer Transform your mind podcast
Deezer Transform your mind podcast

How to Set Goals like a Champion: Tom Brady

Tom Brady says, The key to success lies in, setting goals,  and taking massive action towards the attainment of these, goals.
A hundred years of psychological research has taught us, how to set goals.  If you want to improve your chances of succeeding.

A, goal,  is a map to your destination. It is like a seed!
Plant strong goals in your mind and it will be the most important decision you make in your life.
Then Care of your planted seed every day.

Tom Brady’s story.

By the mid-2000s Tom Brady was the undisputed king of the gridiron. In 2002 he became the youngest quarterback in the history of the National Football League (NFL) to lead his team to a Super Bowl victory. Two years later, in 2004, he proved the magic was still strong when he led the New England Patriots to their second Super Bowl title in three years.

In addition, Brady was named the Super Bowl’s Most Valuable Player (MVP) in 2002 and 2004. The dimpled, clean-cut quarterback had reached career heights that most veteran football players envied, and he had done it all before he was thirty years old; But HE ONCE HAD SIMPLE DREAMS

Google podcast Transform your mind podcast
Google podcast Transform your mind podcast

In the pride-swallowing days at the University of Michigan, when he was constantly trying to prove that he deserved to start, Brady used to sit up at night with his good friend Aaron Shea and talk about, goals, what they’d do when they made it big.

Shea, a tight end for the Wolverines, used to rattle off the typical 20-year-old dream purchases. He wanted a Hummer and a Ferrari. Then Shea would ask what Brady wanted.
“‘If I hit it real big,’” Shea recalls Brady telling him, “‘I want to be able to wake up, put a pair of socks on, and at the end of the day, I throw ’em away.’
“I’m like, ‘That’s all you want?’ And he goes, ‘Yeah, that’s what I want. I love new socks!’”
But somewhere along the line, he got big dreams. Dreams of being the best!

How to Set Goals like Tom Brady

Brady was so intent on winning and becoming the very best in history to play his position, that after the Patriot’s lost to the Broncos in the AFC championship game in 2016, he had a countdown clock installed in his home gym. I am sure because he wanted to be the undisputed champion and Peyton Manning had won, this round! Competition bring out the best in us.

Throughout the year the countdown clock served as his constant reminder of his, goal. A countdown clock says to his subconscious mind. I will achieve this, goal, it is mine, it’s just a matter of time so I am counting down! That is, how to set a goal!

The world was the witness at Super Bowl 51 of Tom Brady manifesting of this goal. Down by 25 points at the half, Tom Brady and the New England Patriots came back to win the game in overtime making Brady the best ever at the game!

 

With his mother in attendance at the NRG Stadium in Houston and millions of fans watching, Brady did not disappoint. In a thrilling game, the first that went into overtime in NFL history, Brady led the Patriots to a 34-28 victory over the Atlanta Falcons. With this historic win, Brady became the first quarterback in NFL history to take home five Super Bowl rings.

He surpassed quarterbacks Joe Montana, one of his idols, and Terry Bradshaw, who both have four Super Bowl wins. He also was awarded his fourth Super Bowl MVP for leading a 25-point comeback and throwing a Super Bowl-record 466 passing yards. Super Bowl LI was Brady’s seventh championship, which is also an NFL record for the most Super Bowls played.

Brady failed in his bid to become the best and most decorated quarterback in history when he lost to the Eagles in Super bowl 52; but how many of you know that failure is not final. Brady will be back again and this time he will succeed because when you have a goal and you don’t give up on it, you always win that is why Coach Lombardi advise is “Never, Never give up, Never ever Quit because Quitters never win”

I am sure there will be another count down clock installed in Brady’s locker room for super bowl 53! I am routing for you Tom!

Goals they have a powerful supernatural energy attached to them!
They activate the subconscious to go to work for you.

In the book “As a man thinketh” by James Allen, Allen attaches the energy of thought to goals.

James Allen teaches how to set goals by controlling your thinking. 

Those who have no central purpose or, goals, in their life fall an easy prey to petty worries, fears, troubles, and self-pityings, all of which are indications of weakness, which lead, just as surely as deliberately planned sins, to failure, unhappiness, and loss, for weakness cannot persist in a power evolving universe.
A man should conceive of a legitimate purpose or, goal, in his heart, and set out to accomplish it.

He should make this, goal, the centralizing point of his thoughts. It may take the form of a spiritual ideal, or it may be a worldly object, according to his nature at the time being; but whichever it is, he should steadily focus his thought-forces upon the object, which he has set before him. He should make this purpose his supreme duty, and should devote himself to its attainment, not allowing his thoughts to wander away into ephemeral fancies, longings, and imaginings.

This is the royal road to self-control and true concentration of thought. Even if he fails again and again to accomplish his goal, the strength of character gained will be the measure of his true success, and this will form a new starting-point for future power and triumph.
What this means is if your only goal as you are starting out in life is to get a job with no thought to what God has placed you on this earth to do, then you will become like a garden full of weeds and wild flowers.

Since no one is tending the garden of your mind then anything will grow. This leads to failure, unhappiness and loss.
On the other hand if you set goals either for spiritual attainment, personal accomplishment, or for contribution even when you fail and you will, you will be like Tom Brady and know that given time, success will be yours.

Having conceived of his purpose, a man should mentally mark out a straight pathway to its achievement, looking neither to the right nor the left. Doubts and fears should be rigorously excluded; they are disintegrating elements, which break up the straight line of effort, rendering it crooked, ineffectual, useless. Thoughts of doubt and fear never accomplished anything, and never can. They always lead to failure. Purpose, energy, power to do, and all strong thoughts cease when doubt and fear creep in.

Amy Purdy teaches how to set goals after her near death experience

My daughter sent me a text message last week and said mom you have to listen to this. This is important. So, I dropped everything and listened! I was blown away. Oprah was interviewing <strong>Amy Purdy.</strong

This is her story:
After losing both her legs at age 19 as a result of bacterial meningitis, Amy Purdy survived to lead a life of extraordinary accomplishments. Amy not only survived losing her legs but at one time all her organs were failing, and she actually died. She tells that when she died, two spirits on the other side offered her a choice of staying dead or coming back to life and she shouted No, I don’t want to die!!

She chose life the same way she chose not to be a disabled person who lives an uninspiring life. She chose to set the goal of snowboarding again. She tells the story of how she visualized in detail her achieving this goal. Amy is a Paralympic bronze medalist in snowboarding, and a finalist on “Dancing with the Stars”. Pick up a copy of her book “On My Own Two Feet: From Losing My Legs to Learning the Dance of Life.” To read about her incredible story

So today, I would like to teach you, How to set  goals. Goals, that make you want to get up in the morning. Goals, that motivate and inspire you to action.

Do you have a goal to write a book? Is there a testimony that God has purposed you to share?

Click the link below to get Brian Tracy’s 6-Step Book Planning Worksheet,

https://www.anrdoezrs.net/click-8460948-10420164

This simple guide will help writers determine the subject of their book and how to clarify their message, while offering helpful tips on how to gather and organize information. This easy-to-follow planning worksheet will also explain how to tell a story in a logical and captivating manner and how to efficiently outline an entire book, chapter by chapter.

How to Set Goals Step # 1
Start with a road-map

He who doesn’t have a map gets lost.
If you don’t know where you are going, then it doesn’t matter where you end up.
Begin with the end in mind e.g.
• I want to have $500,000 in my bank account at the age of 65, so as not to be a burden to my kids.
• I want to leave a legacy and an inheritance for my children and my children’s children.
• I want to have 3 children, a husband, a good job and own my own home by the time I am 35 years old.
• Tom Brady goal is becoming the best at the sport
• Amy’s goal was to continue doing the things she did with legs and then inspire others along the way.

Knowing where you are going allows you to map the route to your destination.

The body is the servant of the mind. It obeys the operations of the mind, whether they be deliberately chosen or automatically expressed. At the bidding of unlawful thoughts, the body sinks rapidly into disease and decay; at the command of glad and beautiful thoughts it becomes clothed with youthfulness and beauty.

How To Set Goals Step 2: Know Your Why?

What was Tom Brady’s Why?
What was Amy’s why?

He who has conquered doubt and fear has conquered failure. His every thought is allied with power, and all difficulties are bravely met and wisely overcome. His purposes are seasonably planted, and they bloom and bring forth fruit, which does not fall prematurely to the ground.

Why do you want to have $500,000 in your bank account at 65?
• Do you want to travel the world?
• Do you want to be sure you have enough income to last for 30 years after retirement? So as not to depend on your kids or the government to take care of you?

Knowing your why will get you through the tough times.

Characteristics of a Strong Goal: A goal must have 3 characteristics:
It must be specific – $500,000
It must have a date for completion – 65 years old
It must be realistic and achievable – A goal can be just a dream with a date on it

How to Set Goals Step 3: Plan your route

So, you want to have $500,000 in the bank at 65 years old.
If you are 30 years old now and have $10,000 in the bank, what would your route to get you $490,000 in the bank in 35 years?
What kind of investment strategies can get you there?
If you plan to work and get a paycheck then that goal will not realistic or achievable.
There are investment strategies that can get you there.
Buying and selling real estate can get you there.
Speak with a financial planner to put together an investment strategy that will get you to your goal.

Do you want to write a book? If so check out my story in my book Out of the Snares, a story of hope and encouragement

Books: Hope and Encouragement

How to Set Goals Step 4: Measure your progress

If you have a 35-year plan to make $490,000.
You should measure your progress on a yearly basis.
At the end of year one, you should be $14,000 richer by year two $28,000 richer than year one and so on and so on.
If by your 40th year, you have made no progress, then you should take a hard look at your financial situation and make some changes.
You have to make changes to the route.
Are you still working and trying to save? We know that is not going to work.
You may have to use Leverage.
Borrow to invest. Get your credit score in shape and borrow to invest in Real Estate. I was listening to the audio book “Self Made” last week and the author said don’t buy shoes, buy buildings! Great advice.

What you shouldn’t do is worry that you would be broke and penniless at 65 years old and have to be placed in a nursing home. I know where your mind goes when you think of yourself as a failure.

Disease and health, like circumstances, are rooted in thought. Sickly thoughts will express themselves through a sickly body. Thoughts of fear have been known to kill a man as speedily as a bullet, and they are continually killing thousands of people just as surely though less rapidly. The people who live in fear of disease are the people who get it. Anxiety quickly demoralizes the whole body, and lays it open to the entrance of disease; while impure thoughts, even if not physically indulged, will soon shatter the nervous system.

How to Set Strong Goals Step 5: Be prepared for the twists and turns in the road

What skills do you need to acquire to achieve this goal?
What contacts do you need?
What additional knowledge do you need?
What resources do you need to accomplish this goal?

Remember that just because you set a, goal, and a destination don’t expect the weather will cooperate and the sky will be sunny for the entire trip.
No. Expect that there will be circumstances beyond your control that will delay you so build in a buffer. Add a few years to your deadline.

In the 30 years to your goal, you will experience set backs. A job loss, a divorce, health issues etc. Don’t let the twists and turns in the road, derail you from your goals.

I heard a story of a mother of two who was laid off and without income. She decided to start selling the things in her home on eBay to pay the bills. She then started a meet up group for other eBay sellers to learn the business. She got information for sourcing discount items from wholesalers to sell on eBay. Obviously, her household items could only get her so far!
At one of these meetup meetings she met an executive from eBay who encouraged her to become a certified ambassador for eBay. That 10Xd her business. Today she has income of over one million dollars annually from eBay sales.

The lesson, setbacks can push you in the direction of your purpose; so change the way you look at failure.

Suffering is always the effect of wrong thought in some direction. It is an indication that the individual is out of harmony with himself, with the Law of his being. The sole and supreme use of suffering is to purify, to burn out all that is useless and impure. Suffering ceases for him who is pure. There could be no object in burning gold after the dross had been removed, and a perfectly pure and enlightened being could not suffer.

How to Set Strong Goals Step 6: Seeing your path

Use your imagination to visualize the things you want to accomplish
Visualize in color with all the details!

At 65 years old, what will you look like?
What color would be your hair, what are you wearing?
Where will you be living?
Who will be the partner by your side?
What will the house sound like when the grand children come to visit and run and play all over the house?
What countries will you travel to? How long will you stay?

See with your mind’s eye the entire life you want.
See it, touch it, taste it for 15 mins every day.
If you are a visual person you can use a picture to represent your dream and look at it every day.

Only by much searching and mining, are gold and diamonds obtained, and man can find every truth connected with his being, if he will dig deep into the mine of his soul; and that he is the maker of his character, the molder of his life, and the builder of his destiny.

So, live your life on purpose. Set goals,  for achievement, for contribution for fun and play and then go do it!

Additional Resources

Transform your Mind VBlog

 

How to Become the Author of Your Life

We are the, author, of our lives. When we were born we had an beginning page and an end page.  It is up to us to, author, and fill in the pages in-between.

We are the, author, of the script, the director and the producer of our lives. Life by design, is what I teach as a, life coach. And I think that one of the first things that we can do is if we understand the power of self-amplifying feedback loops, the way our spaces influence our thinking and our thinking in turn influences our spaces.

We could then control what happens to us by exercising creative control over the circumstances that we throw ourselves into.

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

Introduction to Author your Life

There’s always going to be the wild card. There’s always going to be the circumstances you can’t plan for; but, life by design, is the concept that we can use our thoughts and the, law of attraction, to bring to us all that we desire.

There’s always the unexpected relevance and the, serendipity. But just like that book The Power of Pull talks about, we can funnel the, serendipity, or we can channel the, serendipity, funnel. We can help engender and engineer serendipity by the choices that we make every moment, and live a, life by design.

  • We all have experienced the, serendipity, of relevant information arriving just when we were least expecting it.

  • It was only through pure, serendipity, that I met my best friend!

  • Your chances of finding such a feature are down to either extremely assiduous trawling or mere, serendipity.

So by cultivating rich social networks, by cultivating weak ties, not just closed ties but the weak ties, by becoming connectors and by connecting others so that they connect us, we create a world in which these self-amplifying feedback loops feed on top of each other.

Deezer Transform your mind podcast
Deezer Transform your mind podcast

So good circumstances lead to other good circumstances which lead to other good circumstances and each one of them encourages us to then live more openly and participate in that sort of creative flow space. Live a, life by design.

Be the, author, of your own self-help book, I just really believe that our creative choices ultimately shape who we become and so we should all be discerning and be radically open whenever possible and I think that we really can make a masterpiece out of our own lives if we so choose. But that requires, it requires a boldness of character as well, because seeing the radical freedom to live a, life by design. We have to compose our lives, what Leary called internal freedom.

The vertigo of freedom, this dizzying – what do I do? I can do anything? Well, the paradox of too much choice. But I think we can embrace that with courage and with boldness, and once we do, there’s nothing we can’t do but, author, the life we want.

Author of our Own Lives

As the, author, of our own lives we can begin by taking control of our own lives. This  requires recognizing that while family or social circumstances influence our character, they do not determine it absolutely. 

The same is true of the most basic instincts that come from our heredity and bodily constitution. These instinctive ways of acting can be molded and guided by the exercise of a will that heeds the dictates of a well-formed reason.

Our personality is forged to the extent that we make free decisions, since our actions not only alter our environment but also shape our way of being. Although at times we aren’t fully aware of it, the repetition of acts leads us to acquire particular customs or attitudes in facing reality.

Therefore when we explain the reason for our spontaneous reactions, rather than saying “that’s the way I am,” we should often admit: “that’s the way I have made myself.”

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Our lives are conditioned by factors that are often difficult to control: for example, the quality of family relationships, the social environment in which we grow up, an illness that limits us in one way or another, etc. 

Although often we are unable to ignore or undo these limitations, we can certainly change our attitude in confronting them, especially if we are aware that nothing escapes God’s provident care. “It is important to keep reminding ourselves that Jesus did not address himself to a privileged set of people; he came to reveal the universal love of God to us.

Transform your Mind VBlog

God loves all mankind, and he wants all to love him.  God is also the, author, and finisher of our lives. In any situation, even one that entails great limitations, we can offer God and our neighbors deeds of love, no matter how small these may seem.

Who knows how great the value is of a smile in the midst of tribulation, of suffering offered to our Lord in union with the Cross, of patiently accepting small annoyances and setbacks! Nothing can quench a limitless love, a love stronger than suffering, loneliness, abandonment, betrayal, slander, physical and moral suffering, and even death itself.

Additional resources

 

Can Introverts be Successful Networkers?

Introverts, are not extroverts and most find, networking, challenging. It is possible to be an introvert and become a wildly successful networker. In his book “An Introvert’s Guide to World Domination” Author Nick Shelton offers practical, reliable strategies for forming lasting connections with others. You will improve your confidence, strengthen your relationships and gain access to people and opportunities you’ve never had before.

An Introvert’s Guide to World Domination shows introverts a way to access their best life and upgrade their lives and lifestyles through communications and networking techniques specifically designed with the introvert’s needs in mind.
By breaking the process down into bite-sized steps, Nick Shelton offers practical, reliable strategies for forming lasting connections with others. You will improve your confidence, strengthen your relationships and gain access to people and opportunities you’ve never had before.

Introverts Networking
Introverts Networking

How to Find the Right Group if you are an Introvert
Myrna – When you decided that because you were an, introvert, you were going to change your circle of friends because the friends you were hanging around with were not conducive to you in becoming a social person. How did you find the right group?

Okay, I don’t want people to think that I just completely abandoned everyone I knew or say I’m not talking to my old friends, I still kept in touch with everybody; but I tried to shift my focus more towards people that I thought would be of help to my course to become a networking, introvert.

I looked for groups of people that I thought would be good to be around them. I would find that they have to meetup groups. I would go to these meet up groups and introduce myself to some people. Everybody takes a little time to be comfortable around people, just like relationships they take a little time to build; but it starts off by you initially showing up and just being around and people starting to recognize you.

Myrna – I used to go sit in expensive hotel lobbies for a different reason, not for, networking, but that is a good way to, network, with the rich. I did it to get comfortable with wealth. You were doing it to build a network with influential people, which is good too.


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What inspired you to write the book An Introverts Guide ?

After I figured out how to, network, as an, introvert, by the way I am still an, introvert. I still like to spend a lot of time alone. I recharge myself; but then when I do network, I want to go out and be seen and be heard. I’m able to do that; but once I learned how to do this then, I was often invited to do some speaking about it. I would go to speaking events and people would ask me where can we get your book, and I would say I don’t have a book! I told myself, should probably write a book.

An Introvert’s Guide to World Domination

I realized there’s a lot of, introverts, who would get a lot out of a book about how to network as an, introvert, so I sat down and starting writing a book. I knew exactly what I wanted to say. I wanted to help, introverts, who were in similar situations be able to have the steps that they needed to upgrade their lifestyles and really enhance their experience, networking.

I think everything in life comes down to your connections and your relationships and if you can have better connected relationships, it makes the life of the, introvert, so much richer. You don’t even have to be, networking, with billionaires on yachts; it can just be with your own family and close friends or people in the community.

Myrna – One of the questions that popped into my mind as you were talking about speaking and meet-up groups was, did you join toastmasters?

I did go to toastmasters because everybody says, you have to go to toastmasters. I went to toastmasters but; I didn’t really like toastmasters. Everybody said to me what are you talking about, you have to like toastmasters, everybody likes toastmasters; but I don’t know it didn’t do it for me.

I know a lot of people say well if you’re shy and, introverted, and socially awkward; how can you do public speaking? I think I have some kind of weird defect in my brain that allows me to think whenever I do public speaking, I go into a dreamlike trance. We can do anything in our dreams, you’re not a body.

If you just say go talk to those four people over there then I become an, introvert; but if you say there’s a hundred people go talk to them that’s fine, I become an, extrovert.

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Myrna – You’re kidding that that’s weird wiring; but you know it’s not that I haven’t heard it before. It is probably a good time to have a definition of an, introvert, and how that is different from, extrovert. How does someone know if they’re an, extrovert, or, introvert? We can figure out that if you are shy you may be an, introvert but I am sure there is more.

Define an introvert and the different levels
There are some people that are more, introverted, than others and there’s different categories. I’d say generally you are an, introvert, if you get drained by being out and interacting with people and have to recharge by being yourself.

I fit that category, that’s the classic, introvert. You can also be shy and that doesn’t necessarily make you an, introvert. I suffered from being shy and being drained by being around people plus the social awkwardness. I didn’t know what to do and how to even interact with people, so there’s different combinations of, introversion, and there’s different levels.

One of my closest friends who has had great success with some of the techniques I teach in my book, always makes fun of me; because he always tries to compare himself saying, I’m way more, introverted, than you. I tell him this isn’t a competition.

I say that to say there’s different levels for the, introvert; so there’s different things that different obstacles that, introverts, have to deal with. An obstacle for me might not be an obstacle for my friend. I mentioned the different types of, introverts, the steps in my book is able to help the whole spectrum of, introverts.

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Everything is for everybody; but I say at the beginning of the book pick out the parts that apply to you that you can use and then what’s not helpful right now just file it away and then maybe later once you hit a certain level maybe that’s going to come in handy at a later time.

How can your Book Help Introverts
Myrna– Your book is called “An introvert’s guide to world domination: become a high level networking and upgrade your life.” So what can someone walk away with after reading your book? What are the skills that you want transferred?

I love that question that was really good,

They are going to be able to know what their obstacles are.
What their blocks are
Identify those blocks so then they can get those out of the way
Then they’re going to be able to find social events that appeal to them that can help them achieve whatever goals they desire.
What are the networking steps covered in your book?
We find out what sort of networking, introverts, should you be doing; so we cover the personal, networking, and then I also teach about, networking, in the workplace and at social events. Depending on what your goal is, you’ll have clear steps on what to do in your personal social life, in the workplace and in, networking, events to level up in all of those areas.

You’ll know exactly what to do and say if you go to the company holiday party or if you’re just going to hang out, or you take your kid to soccer practice and there’s going to be a bunch of parents there.

You’ll know exactly what you need to do to be interesting and interested and engage in conversation
How to have good body language and appear confident, calm and approachable.
Show good energy, so you’ll be able to also maintain your relationship
Know where to go, what to do, when you get there who to talk to
What to say and how to talk to people once you’ve established a relationship
How to maintain those relationships; because why build all these relationships if you’re not going to maintain them.
Introverts, will have this whole spectrum of, networking, obstacles; so all they have to do is just work the steps. I break it down really easy; I put little things in there to make sure that, introverts, keep pushing forward. introverts, will be able to go out and put these steps into practice immediately, the very first day even before they finish the book.

What is the definition of a social introvert?
A social, introvert, is somebody who doesn’t like talking to people and is uncomfortable in social situations. That was my biggest challenge as an, introvert, and that’s why I concentrated my book on, networking; even though I think that there are some other areas being an, introvert, would have challenges with.

So there are social, introverts, who aren’t really good around people and they don’t want to be, they want to have nothing to do with, networking, so they’d just rather maybe stay in the science lab or stay in the basement playing video games. This book is not for this type, these steps are for the, introvert, who says, hey I would like to be able to do that, I just don’t know how.

Helping Introverts Lead Regular Lives
I want to help, introverts, feel more confident just day to day in their regular life. Just going to the grocery store or if you live in an apartment building and your neighbors are out on their balcony and you think well I can’t go out on my balcony; because they’re there maybe I should wait until they go inside.

Or when it comes to your work place or when it comes to just any relationships, introverts, have an understanding of what being an, introvert, is really costing them. It’s costing them much more than you can possibly imagine, and it’s all these little micro instances of hiding. If, introverts, can just take that little extra step to not hide, it can completely change their life and lifestyle.

Myrna – I can imagine that an, introvert, is somebody who is a pleaser, because they don’t want to make a fuss right, they don’t want confrontation, they don’t want to challenge whatsoever.

Is the pandemic good or bad for the introvert?
All the, networking, in person situations are no longer an issue and we’re like talking on zoom and we’re in our bedroom and in our house and we don’t have to go out; so is an, introvert’s, heaven. The pandemic is this helping them stay hidden we, introverts, think this is the best time to be alive ever in the history! It gives the, introvert, the excuse to say, hey I would love to be out socializing and hobnobbing with everybody; but I’m locked down.

What can introverts do to make the most of this pandemic situation?
One of the things the, introvert, can do during the pandemic is to strengthen the relationships you already have. COVID gives you a perfect excuse to go through your work email and your personal email of all your contacts and see who you haven’t touched base within say three months. Make a list of those people and then every day just contact a few and just say, hey how are you doing during COVID?

Myrna – I’m going to borrow that to touch base with my real estate clients and just keep up the, networking, because a great strategy for realtors whether they are, introverts, or not to keep, networking, during the pandemic.

How to build your network as an Introvert
If you want to become a high-level networker, or upgrade your life both, introverts, and, extroverts, can be a high-level networker. I’ve had a lot of students who are realtors and they are not, introverts, but they just wanted an edge over their competition and so they used some of these techniques,

Where can listeners get a copy of your book and connect with you on social media?

My book is available on amazon.com An introvert’s guide to world domination You can also visit me on the web at connectedintrovert.com. I have an online course and a mentorship program and a free mini master class.

Thanks for listening to this podcast or watching on YouTube. If you are an iTunes user, please subscribe, rate and review this podcast. I also want to invite you to my Facebook group called Lifecoach and it’s growing by leaps and bounds and you know every day I post little you know inspiring messages.

Are CBD Pills a Wellness Product?

Absolutely, CBD pills, and, CBD oils, are wellness products.  The reason being is our bodies as humans, we have what is called an endocannabinoid system,  so this can basically be viewed as a lock-and-key system where we have receptors in our bodies that then attach to external receptors. This system is actually responsible for contributing to our overall sleep and wake cycle, our mood, our appetite and can really be viewed as an important component in reaching homeostasis, of reaching a balance point in our body.

I interview Joseph Sheeley is the Managing Partner of Cured Nutrition. on the Transform your Mind radio and podcast   Joseph says he left Corporate Aerospace to build his own space from Lockheed Martin design engineer to Managing Partner of premium, CBD oil, CBD pills, and hemp products.

I looked at, cannabis, and, CBD pills, and I noticed that when I used it in a very intentional way, I saw the medicinal benefits. I saw myself be able to calm down, to be able to work on my anxiety and I also saw myself be able to be a lot more creative and when I started to discover that those were the truths underlying marijuana.

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As the years progressed I started diving a lot more into what, cannabis, really was and what all the cannabinoids within the plant were and that’s where, CBD Oil, and CBD pills, became a focus.  I said okay well there’s this cannabinoid cannabidiol and we’ll dive deep into this; but this cannabinoid is non intoxicating unlike THC and has a wide array of medicinal benefits.

I think that’s a very important statement for right now and for the, cannabis, industry and the path that I ended up taking.

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Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

What is the difference between, CBD pills, and marijuana?

As a respected health and fitness professional, I started to use, cannabis, to help me recover.  It also helped me sleep, it helps me calm down.  I utilized my relationships with other health professionals and  put the right information out there into this world, to educate from the standpoint of “Hey I am someone focused on health and fitness and general wellness and I use cannabinoids or, cannabis.”

That is how Cured Nutrition started.  Ordering up, CBD oils, and, CBD pills, and different extracts and creating products at my house. Sending them to community members and saying Hey give this a try. Tell me if it helps you  sleep, or calm down.  I had hand after hand raised. This gave me the data I needed to expand manufacture of, CBD pills, and products.

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Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Not to say it hasn’t been a difficult process because when we speak about, Cannabis,  and we speak about, medical marijuana, it’s not the typical route of starting a business getting a bank account.  Certain things that would be viewed as very easy when starting a business is different when you’re in the, cannabis, space.  So it’s been quite the roller coaster; but I’m extremely thankful for all the experiences we’ve had as a company.

I know, I live in Fort Myers, Florida and in the last election we voted on, medical Marijuana, for whatever reasons it didn’t get enough votes; but sooner or later it will pass. Medical marijuana, is already legal in some other places like you said Colorado.

CBD pills, tinture, topical Cured Nutrition
CBD pills, tinture, topical

What is, CBD oil, and CBD pills?

CBD is a cannabinoid and CBD stands for is cannabidiol.  Cannabidiol is one cannabinoid out of over now eighty cannabinoids that have been identified in the, cannabis, plant.  Other widely known cannabinoid is tetrahydrocannabinol which is THC.  THC is the cannabinoid that is actually intoxicating; but now when we take a step back and we say okay so there’s over 80 cannabinoids in the, cannabis, plant.  What we are learning now is we’ve recognized that all of these cannabinoids have therapeutic benefits and when you combine them certain cannabinoids have certain effects for certain areas.  Now, CBD oil, and CBD pills, specifically has become so popular because you can actually get CBD without any THC in the product.

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Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

There’s a difference between a THC free product and a product that we call full-spectrum.  If the product is called full-spectrum, it means it has all of those cannabinoids that I just discussed found in the product; but at very low concentrations.  The reason that, CBD oil, and, CBD pills, are being mass-produced right now is because the abundance of that cannabinoid.  CBD in the, cannabis, plant is really high and it’s a lot easier to extract from the plant than some of the other minor cannabinoids that would live in that other 80 plus cannabinoids.

If we said, cannabis, and I was looking at a tree a tree diagram, a top-down diagram. I would say, cannabis, live at the top and then below, cannabis, which is where we identify where which plant we’re extracting it from would live hemp and marijuana hemp and marijuana are both of the genus, cannabis.  They are both, cannabis, but the way that they are differentiated is that the hemp plant is identified as having less than 0.3 percent THC; so it’s very low in what we would call the intoxicating cannabinoid.

CBD Pills from the Hemp Plant
CBD Pills from the Hemp Plant

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Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

What is Hemp?

Hemp (Cannabis sativa L.) is a plant grown in the northern hemisphere, best known for its thin, somewhat spiky, green leaves (usually around seven that fan out around the end of each stem). It takes approximately three to four months to mature before harvesting. And it is a dioecious plant, which is a decidedly nerdy way of saying that there are both male and female hemp plants. And they need each other for the female to set seed.

Hemp has a wide variety of uses. You can use the whole plant, including the fiber (from its stems), protein (from its seeds), and oils and smokable portions (from the leaves and flowers). Smokable hemp is a new addition to the CBD industry, as the leaves and flowers of the hemp plant are rich in non-psychoactive cannabidiol, a compound which has many therapeutic properties.

Hemp seeds are small with a slightly sweet and nutty flavor and are technically nuts. While the terms are often used interchangeably, hemp “hearts” are hemp seeds that have had their shell removed, so they’re easier to consume. Hemp hearts are round and have a whitish-green hue with a black center.

Hemp is environmentally friendly, too. It grows in a variety of climates and types of soil, which is possible because of its hardiness. Hemp is resistant to drought and damage from UV rays, as well as most pests. It’s happy to grow tightly packed together, which allows it to shade out and out compete most weeds. That means there’s no point in using chemical pesticides on most hemp crops. It’s also a natural substitute for cotton and wood fiber, both of which take a heavy toll on the environment. Hemp has a low lignin content, which allows it to be pulped using fewer chemicals than wood. And a fully mature hemp plant may contain half of its dry weight in seed, which is an impressively high yield.

Hemp as we as we know and have can see has actually been used for a wide array of purposes whether it be, clothing, biofuel actually food, we’ve all seen hemp seed oil or hemp hearts.  It has so many different purposes but now we’ve actually bred hemp to have high concentrations of, CBD oil, and very low concentrations of THC.

The hemp plant looks very similar to the, medical marijuana, plant to be able to extract the cannabinoids from it,  so then when we look at a, cannabis, plant we would see a plant that’s shorter and has more flowers which are considered the buds.  That’s where all the cannabinoids are coming from.

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Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
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When you look at the marijuana plant, it is basically identified by having greater than 0.3% THC.

It is true that we are extracting, CBD oil, from the marijuana Hemp plant and other cannabinoids from the marijuana plant.  That’s what’s going into edibles that’s what’s going in topical,  that’s what’s potentially going into vaporizers but it’s regulated and can only be sold in a medical dispensary.

Author interview Transform Your Mind Podcast
Author interview Transform Your Mind Podcast

Are, CBD Pills, a Wellness Product? What are the benefits?

Absolutely, CBD pills, and, CBD oils, are wellness products.  The reason being is our bodies as humans, we have what is called an endocannabinoid system,  so this can basically be viewed as a lock-and-key system where we have receptors in our bodies that then attach to external receptors. This system is actually responsible for contributing to our overall sleep and wake cycle, our mood, our appetite and can really be viewed as an important component in reaching homeostasis, of reaching a balance point in our body.  From a general health and wellness perspective,  a lot of people are starting to be see cannabinoids as a wellness product.  CBD pills, specifically are what would be called an adaptogen.  It can be used to reduce the body’s stress response and come back to a place of calm.

CBD oil, has properties that are similar to anti-inflammatories, so that being the case anything that you really can talk about that might be caused from Inflammation.

If anyone needs more information check out www.CBD.org

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Podbean Transform your Mind Podcast

Podbean 

How can we incorporate, CBD oil, into a healthy lifestyle?

We can incorporate, CBD pills, into our lifestyle and take them like we take our vitamins every day. The most convenient way is to use what we call a sublingual dropper or a tincture.  It comes in a bottle that has a dropper, you shake it up you take the dropper and fill it up with, CBD oil, you put it underneath your tongue and then you hold it for 30 to 60 seconds.  Within 10 to 15 maybe 20 minutes, you will feel the calming effects.

But now an even more concentrated way would be to use it in a capsule form called, CBD pills. If you take CBD in a capsule, CBD pills, you can actually get a lot higher concentration.  It goes through your stomach, it’s processed and is delivered directly into your bloodstream.

We also have topical.  You also have to ensure when you’re using a topical that it has the correct ingredients to also help with the absorption, so I would say always start with a tincture, then progress to the capsule, CBD pills,  and then use the topical for spot treatment.

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Betty Tucker came of age in Belle Glade, Florida, infamous for its poverty and violence. Her childhood was one of de-bili-ta-ting poverty, borne of racism, exploitive migrant labor, multiple rapes and other abuse, and chronic illness among her family and acquaintances … the list is long and bitter.

Betty moved to California, earned her College  degree, and raised a family. Then, in 1997, she began a long and eventually successful search for the twin girls she had given up for adoption thirty years earlier.

Don’t worry about the Mule going Blind is a book about Fear, insecurity, sexual abuse, and neglect: This memoir will look beyond the description of these difficulties in the author’s life to examine how she acquired the tools she needed to take more control of her life, and what decisions impacted her choices.

Pick up your copy today! Don’t worry about the Mule going Blind now available on Amazon.

Book: Don't worry about the mule going blind
Don’t worry about the mule going blind

At Cured Nutrition we have a progressive line of products which we call our super supplements which include other botanicals and actually functional mushrooms in them as well.  So our products have the cannabinoids; but we’ve taken the cannabinoids and we’ve approached our holistic or our clinical herbalist in Boulder Colorado and she ended up developing some products for us that are specifically for focus.

We have one, CBD pills, that is releasing soon for gut health and then one specifically called, Zen for sleep. Within those products what we’ve done is we’ve taken not only the cannabinoids, but other botanicals that have come from traditional Chinese medicine and also included functional mushrooms which have amazing benefits.

I’ve created a coupon code for your listeners 20% off and that’s “transform” If you use that code at checkout you get 20% off.

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Transform your mind iTunes Podcast iTunes
Download on iTunes

I just want to remind you all that you to join at my private Facebook group Called, Life Coach, and there you will also get encouragement to transform your life every day on different subjects and topics.

Also if you have not done so already, please subscribe, rate and review The Transform Your Mind podcast on iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Additional Resources 

Why a Healthy Lifestyle is Important to Fight COVID-19

Hemp seeds are a nutritional dark horse in the world of seeds. While they’re packed with healthy nutrients and can contribute flavor and texture to dozens of different dishes, most people don’t view them as a pantry staple. This article aims to change that!

Celebrating Black Love Introducing BlackdateBox

Love is a spirit and if you speak to love it will return back to you when you call it. Black Love, is no different; but we need to change the narrative because Black women deserve love.

I think that love is waiting for everyone to be silent, so that love can speak for itself.

Today we are celebrating black love.  My guest is Lisa Kimberle author of “500 ways to celebrate black love”

Here is the synopsis of 500 ways to celebrate, Black Love

500 ways to celebrate, black love, provides an accelerating approach to, black love relationships. Love coach and enthusiast Lisa Kimberle gets candid through personal reflection in hope of inspiring real, black love, stories.  This is her story, a story filled with passion and discovery that led her to a wonderful fulfilling, black love, relationship.  This is a, black love book, and it introduces the, blackdatebox, a subscription box created with love for all relationship stages. Blackdatebox, asks the question, what is black love?  It celebrates, black love, and highlights black owned businesses and retailers.

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Welcome to Cotton For The Soul™ podcast, www.cottonforthesoul.com an up close and personal raw & unfiltered perspective on life experience of eating a plant-base diet. Spreading Good vibrations while living a minimalist lifestyle outside the matrix. Whether you have taken the pill of knowledge or the pill of blissful ignorance, thank you for tuning in from down the rabbit hole. Now, buckle your seat-belt because it’s about to get real! We upload a new episode every Thursday

Transform Your Mind iHeart Radio
iHeart Radio

Why did you write the book “500 ways to black to celebrate, black love?”

For me it all started from my personal journey.  What I was personally going through in my love life.  I was in a relationship and everything seemed right, we were very compatible.  It seemed like it was love at first sight, and then when we further got in the relationship, we discovered that we just were not meant to be together.  He was not a bad person or anything like that; but it was for someone else, it wasn’t for me and we were both totally fine ending the relationship. It was a three year journey that I spent discovering, what is black love.

I started researching family history and I discovered things and thoughts that existed within the family passed down from my grandparents and from my parents.  One of the interesting things that I discovered about my grandmother was that for whatever reason my grandmother hated relationships.  I kind of discovered during the journey about, black love, and what to do to break your patterns,  because these patterns are cyclical and runs for generations.

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Transform your Mind TuneIn Radio
TuneIn Radio

I don’t know your story; but I know as a,  Life coach,  I know women who cycle from abusive relationships into new abusive relationships. That’s their pattern, and they keep going into those relationships. They don’t look for them,  but it just happens.  So what you’re saying is exactly what happens, we all attract the same kind of man and it’s something unconsciously that we’re doing.  You traced your pattern and you found that it came from parental influence.

The second thing I discovered when I began researching, black love,  is that the internet portrayed, black love relationships, as nonexistent. I bumped into articles such as the one in Marie Claire magazine titled “Marriages are for white people”  and then when I read the article it goes further on to explain how marriage isn’t for black women!

500 ways to Celebrate Black Love
500 ways to celebrate Black Love

So now I am dealing with the generational belief passed down from my parents and grandparents, then it’s the societal belief that black women does not deserve love.

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Transform your Mind Spotify Podcast
Download on Spotify

Is, Black Love, different than White Love?

No, Love is a spirit and it does not define color. But as black women we have some challenges to find fulfilling black relationship. After my 3 year relationship went  sour, I really wanted to help black women find that perfect love. Since I couldn’t find any, black love books, I decided to write one.

I believe that love is a spirit and if you speak to love it will return back to you when you call it.

I think that love is waiting for everyone to be silent, so that love can speak for itself.

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Beauty it’s all about how you present yourself. It’s about being brave, being strong and having an attitude. It is about daring to trust yourself, overcoming your fears and going further.
Beauty lies within us all, allowing us to bloom in the dark and overcome any obstacle.
Just like the lotus flower.
Visit our store and discover all we have specially prepared for you. We have the most complete store where you can find high quality products at the best prices.
Our website is , www.lotusflowerbeautysupply.com, dare to show the world your inner and outer beauty.  Follow us in Instagram @lotusflowerbeautysupply,

Transform your Mind Stitcher
Transform your Mind Stitcher

What are 3 of the 500 ways to celebrate. Black love?

  • Wholeness before pleasure.
  • Becoming best version of ourselves. That’s discovering who you are.
  • Becoming the best version of us as a black race.

What is Quantum Water Leaping and how does this celebrate, Black Love?

Couples Quantum Water Leaping is utilizing water as a representation of life. I believe that water is life and so if it’s used as a representation to cleanse out the old love reality whatever that is,  whether it’s past relationships, old marriages, things that you haven’t forgiven yourself for concerning past relationships or anything thing that can hinder your, black love relationship. You are using that water and jumping into like a new love reality. It’s a quantum leap.

Couples Quantum Jumping is all about strengthening, black love relationships, because it is very true that relationships breakup because we’re carrying baggage. Leaping from one to the next is a perfect way to drop off your baggage!

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Author Betty Tucker shares the story of her life in her memoir, Don’t Worry About The Mule Going Blind.  Betty Tucker came of age in Belle Glade, Florida, infamous for its poverty and violence. Her childhood was one of de-bili-ta-ting poverty, borne of racism, exploitive migrant labor, multiple rapes and other abuse, and chronic illness among her family and acquaintances … the list is long and bitter. Betty moved to California, earned her College  degree, and raised a family. Then, in 1997, she began a long and eventually successful search for the twin girls she had given up for adoption thirty years earlier.
Don’t worry about the Mule going Blind is a book about Fear, insecurity, sexual abuse, and neglect: This memoir will look beyond the description of these difficulties in the author’s life to examine how she acquired the tools she needed to take more control of her life, and what decisions impacted her choices.  Pick up your copy today! Don’t worry about the Mule going Blind now available on Amazon.

Soundcloud Transform your mind podcast
Transform your Mind Soundcloud podcast

How does the, Blackdatebox, Help, Black Love Relationships?

The, blackdatebox,  is a quarterly subscription box brand and it was created to celebrate, black love. We celebrate, black love, depending on the season such as Christmas and other holidays or occasions that a couple wants to celebrate.  For example there is a quarantine love box.

It has most of what you need to create a date at home and while you’re on the stay at home experience, you will kindle a deeper level of communication, a deeper level of love.

The, blackdatebox, comes with the rose petals and the candles and whatever you need to create a romantic date.

We are coming into summer so the summer celebration, blackdatebox, 2020 has fireworks inside the box.  There’s two different boxes for the summer celebration because some couples may want to have a daytime date, so I have a brunch box.  I work with a chef she lives in Alabama her name is Erika Barrett she makes these excellent pancakes, so she’s one of the African American business that are featured in the box. The, blackdatebox,  comes with decorations for the ambiance and  all the couples have to do is add the feelings of love!

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I also have a product that is amazing.  It’s a game with miracle berries and they’re actually from Ghana and some people have taste tripping parties.

You take these berries and they’re intact in form and then they dissolve on your tongue.  You have to let it dissolve for about 10 minutes, once it dissolves and you suck a lemon or a lime it is going to turn everything that you’re tasting, sweet.  It’s an amazing experience.

When somebody goes out and purchases your book, what do you hope that they will come away with?

I’m hoping that my readers get inspired and more empowered.  I’m hoping that it will inspire them to their own self journey to finding, black love,  and discoveries of their family history that could be blocking, black love. I want to change the narrative of, black love, and society.  I want my book to be a form of mental jogging.

Author interview Transform Your Mind Podcast
Order your Author interview Transform Your Mind Podcast

How do you advise women to set their intention for, black love?

Whenever you have good intentions for being in a relationship then you will manifest those intentions. One way to set intentions is with daily affirmations. Some of these affirmations are:

  • I am loved
  • I am black and lovable
  • I am black excellence

If your intentions are that you want love because of loneliness,  change your intentions. Your purpose for wanting a relationship must be because you have something to give, not want. If you set your intentions in a good way then you’ll receive good results. Call love and it will come!

I pray that everyone every listener, every reader of my book that this will be the best year of, Black love, or any other love for them. I just want to pray that Love Finds them from the north, the South, the east and the West.  I just want to pray that they receive total healing.

Sponsor The Transform Your Mind Podcast
Sponsor The Transform Your Mind Podcast

Additional Resources

How to Find your Soulmate – the Science of Attraction

How Single Women can Find Love

 

Does Love have a Color: The Interracial Marriage Experience

Not until after we got married Kevin confided and shared with me a few situations where family members questioned his choices and wanted to ensure he understood the challenges that come with an, interracial marriage. Ericka Augutis

I want to invite you guys all to the table. We are going to be talking on the topic the, “The Color of love, interracial marriages, in America”   my guest today is Erica Augustus.

Listen to the interview

Interracial Marriage in America

Ericka and I became friends when we worked at Office Depot for about 10 years, and we have maintained our friendship.  I decided that I wanted to get into the conversation on, interracial marriages, in America because of what’s been happening in the world and specifically in the last month or so.

It’s a very difficult place for a, black woman, married to a, white man. I think it’s even a little bit more complicated when your partner or your spouse cannot understand a lot of the times your, black experience.   I was listening to a podcast a few weeks ago and this, black woman, was talking about her experience.

She was married for 13 years to a, white man, the marriage dissolved not because of racial differences or any kind of racial problems, but she said it contributed to it, because her husband never really got into the conversation.  If she would come home and say she was discriminated against at the office, he didn’t have a response or didn’t talk about it and then the host asked her the question.

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Interracial Marriage black man white woman
Interracial Marriage black man white woman

Can a, white man, love a, black woman, and still be a racist?

And her response was, “love has nothing to do with it”, now that piqued my interest and that’s the predominant reason that I wanted to get into this conversation, and have you guys all join in the conversation and discuss, the color of love.

Interracial Marriage Interview Highlights

    1. How did you and your husband meet?
    2. How Ericka and Kevin handled the stares from Black and White people in their, interracial marriage, when they walked down the street.
    3. What are her thoughts on Systemic racism, did her husband understand her experience as a, Black woman.
    4. Love has no color. How easy is it to love someone from a different race?
    5. How does she and her husband talk to her black sons regarding the police.
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My name is Ericka Augutis, my husband  Kevin and I have been married for 18 years 19 in November.  We do have two children. One is 14 and the other is 4.

We met about 22 years ago. He worked at a local Blockbuster in my neighborhood. He was a manager and anytime I would go into the store to look at videos, he would offer to help me.  Well that’s when our relationship started.  Finally we went on our first date and I have to say it was really awkward for both of us and I thought okay I’m never doing that again. He was super quiet there was very little conversation.  A few months went by and he called again, and asked for a second date and I was going to say no, but my mom chimed in and asked me to give him another chance.  I’m so glad I did that second date because we just had the best time.

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We dated to my dismay for nearly five years,  we were engaged twice. The first proposal I  accepted I was elated.  I was excited to say yes; but a few months later we went to a party with some of our friends and I realized some of the ladies didn’t even know I was engaged. Here I was super excited and some of his circle of friends didn’t know that were engaged. So, it really hit me hard.  I felt like okay I’m really pressuring him into this, interracial  marriage. So I called off the engagement.

After that we kind of went our separate ways for a few months and then we slowly started dating again. And I have to say both of us matured during that time of separation and he proposed a second time in restaurant. He got down on one knee in front of all these people and proposed me a second time. This time he was ready! We got married like a year later.

Myrna Young Did you think that he maybe didn’t want to tell his friends he was engaged because you were a, black woman?

Ericka Augutis No, I don’t think the fact that we were contemplating an, interracial marriage, had anything to do with it, or the, color of love, because I was in his circle of friends for four years. We all vacationed together so it wasn’t that. I just felt like he wasn’t ready and I was forcing him to get married.

Myrna Young I’m going to ask you not a question as a follow-up to that.  So all the time you guys dated, five years or so, you got engaged twice you didn’t see color?  The question today is there a, color of love?  Did any of your friends treated you differently? Or said  Ericka he’s white?  None of his friends says hey Kevin why do you want to marry a, black woman? Nothing?

Ericka Augutis Not until after we got married Kevin confided and shared with me a few situations where family, maybe one or two family members, questioned his choices and wanted to ensure he understood the challenges to come with an, interracial marriage.

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So yes, from my perspective it came later as well, being a successful, black woman,  my parents and other family members wanted to know why I was  dating someone that doesn’t look like me. I really had to kind of ask myself that question as well.  I realized it’s not as if I said to myself,  I’m going to find a Caucasian man and have this, interracial marriage. I fell in love with a white man.

Myrna Young Yea Love is color blind actually, Love is an Emotion, it’s a feeling and it doesn’t see color!

Ericka Augutis There were experiences and times where we had to deal with the looks and the stairs especially when we would go into places where everyone was a little older.  I would say during that time anyone that was over age of 65 would give us those looks on both sides. It’s not just the Caucasian folks, black folks as well.

Myrna Young Did you let the stares and looks bother you?

Ericka Augutis No, Kevin was always so confident and strong and it made me just feel like I had nothing to worry about. But there was this time just after we had our son Kevin Jr,  we were having dinner in this fancy restaurant and this gentleman,  I probably shouldn’t call him a gentleman. A white man,  came over to our table and he said to Kevin, Is this your son? My husband says yes, he says well I’m going to tell you I’m a doctor that’s not your son!

You got to be kidding me!

I am not kidding.  it was such a strange experience. I mean he just came over and I think his goal was just to disturb our night and really rock and test the foundations of our, interracial marriage. That was one experience that I’ll never forget.

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Myrna Young Okay but in your marriage of itself was there any kind of friction at all regarding race?  Was all the friction from outside people looking in and trying to disturb your harmony?  For instance as a, black woman, is it hard to go and talk to a partner that is outside your race about racism that’s been happening to you?  Because, it’s not their experience and they can’t understand it how a, black women, survive in the workplace for instance? As a, black woman, I have not been discriminated against a lot and especially growing up in Canada; but I know that if I was talking to a, black man, who had a white spouse, it would have been a totally different conversation. Because as a, black man, he would have been harassed by the police, he would have been discriminated at work, he would have experienced racism throughout his life. Racism that  his white spouse would not be able to understand or identify.

So, did any of those situations happen in your marriage where your husband couldn’t understand your black experience?

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Ericka Augutis I would say initially when we’re in the newlywed stage, there were a few situations, super minor things, nothing hardcore or anything like that; but I could tell there was an inequality in the situation.  When I  talked about it, he would always ask me why  I was so passionate? That was his word or way of saying, why are you so angry? It took me about three or four times of him saying that or using that phrase for me to get that he’s trying to ask me to express myself and make him understand.  Why was something so small making you angry?  So, once I understood what he was truly trying to say and ask me, we had a tough conversation on racism.

I explained to him  the history black people and the challenges I’ve experienced throughout my career being a, black woman.  I think in his career not everyone knows he’s married to a, black woman; so he would hear things people would say that were borderline racist and he would tell me he got it.

Myrna Young Not only did your husband not understand your black experience but as a, black woman, I didn’t understand my husband’s black experience either. My husband was a police officer and what upset him more than anything else was that he was going out there every night putting his life on the line and yet the white officers were racial against him.  Not just my husband; but they were racist against all the black officers in the department. There was no equality even when they could die together.  My husband would say we bleed the same blood, when we’re out there on the street and I am treated differently. I didn’t understand until recently when I understood the definition of a racist and the definition of racist policies.  I had to go back to him and apologize for not understanding.

That’s basically what I would I wanted to you know.  To find out from you how is the cohesiveness in an, interracial marriage, when one person has white privilege and the other person has to claw their way for everything?

So, the other question I have on here is and I think you mentioned it, people staring at you and I think you said that you felt protected because Kevin was so strong and you weren’t scared; but did it bother you psychologically?

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Ericka Augutis We’ve been married for so long,  I would say it bothered me until we had our son.  A small portion of me would wonder is it worth it?   Is it worth it, why can’t we just go out to dinner and just have a nice dinner without any stares, comments or judgment?  So I would say, yes it does bother you, it does affect you.  You just have to find a way to deal with it and ensure that your relationship is solid enough where it’s worth it.

How does Interracial Marriage affect children?

Myrna Young How does your 14-year-old son, he’s old enough to understand what’ going on right now in the world, how does he relate to having a white dad?

Ericka Augutis Oh, that’s a good question so, he’s actually okay with it. He was in Boy Scouts from the age of I think five or six until 12 years old and I remember we were on a camping trip he may have been 7 or 8 at the time and he came into our tent and I could tell something was wrong.  His face was a little flushed, so I said to him what’s wrong he said this kid asked him why is your dad white and your mom black?

I said, what did you say?  He says I said because they love each other! So I think he’s okay with what’s going on right now.  I did not know how to quite handle it when a child asked him like where is he from? If he was Spanish?  I think that’s he’s at that stage where he’s getting that question and has to figure out how he’s going to handle it and answer it.

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Is there a Color to Love? The Answer is NO.

Myrna Young It sounds like your, interracial marriage, is healthy. You guys don’t see color.  Your, color of love, is blended.  You love your kids, you show them love you don’t show them a difference and that’s definitely the way to go about it.  So your, interracial marriage,  experience has been a good one.  As a, black woman, marrying outside of your race  you still go through get the same racism and racist policies that our, black men, go through on a lesser scale.

That’s basically what I wanted to have a conversation so that we can shed a light on, interracial marriages. I mean we’re looking at black and white but, interracial marriage, can also be Spanish and black or even religion Muslim and Christian or anything that makes you different.  It causes some controversy or cause some friction.

Ericka Augutis I don’t want the podcast listeners thinking I am making, interracial marriage, sound like it’s just perfect.  Absolutely not, there are challenges don’t get me wrong.  When we get invited to parties and there’s only a sprinkle of brown and black people in room, you have to figure out how to navigate.  Do you want to be like over-the-top polished or just be yourself. When our families get together we both have to play roles.  Every day you encounter racism. If you’re dealing with the public or you go in a public space you’re dealing with those types of situations where people are looking people are asking questions so it’s a conversation that you have more often than not. When you’re in a relationship like this, it’s something that you have to deal with if you want it to work out.

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Myrna Young I thank you for coming on and having a seat at this table I appreciate it. I hope our readers and listeners learned a few things one, interracial marriages, can work. They can be successful, you just have to have love and talk about it.

I want to remind you that if you like this content, please share with your friends, subscribe on iTunes rate and leave a review.

Additional Resources and mentions

Paradigm Shifts that can Heal Racism in America

How to Find your Soulmate – the Science of Attraction

https://voxeu.org/article/incarceration-unemployment-and-black-white-marriage-gap-us

Coronavirus, How to Protect Yourself

Coronavirus: How to Protect Yourself
Coronavirus: How to Protect Yourself

The, coronavirus, is the latest virus to reach pandemic spread.  Before it was SARSEbolaAids. Since these viruses come around every couple of years, learn how to protect yourself.

In this episode Dr Joe Nieusma, shares information on how viruses like the common cold, influenza virus, and other viruses operate in our body, what is the virus intent, how our immune system fights, what happens when the, immune system, looses the fight, and how health care workers stabilize patients.  We look specifically on what makes the, coronavirus, so deadly and so infectious. Finally we discuss wellness programs and how you can protect yourself against the, coronavirus, and the next infectious virus, since they come around every 2 years or so.

Coronavirus Update,

As we record this episode the world is in a panic regarding the, Coronavirus, also called the, COVID-19

  • The US death toll for the, corona virus, has climbed to more than 278
  • COVID-19, cases in the US have surpassed 22,000+  and there are more than 298,000+ cases  worldwide, 12,755+ deaths. 
  • Confirmed cases of the novel, coronavirus, have topped 200,000 worldwide
  • Federal reserve cuts interest rates to nearly zero
  • Italy reported 368 new, coronavirus, related deaths on March 15, a 25% rise
  • Many US retailers have cut hours or closed in the face of the, coronavirus
  • Spain reported that deaths from the, coronavirus, have more than doubled in a day to 288 with infections near 8,000
  • All these reports have produced fear. People are hoarding supplies.  There is no toilet paper, wipes, hand sanitizer, bleach, hydrogen peroxide and other items in the stores. 

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My guest today is Dr Joe Nieusma is the fearless CEO/Chief Toxicologist at Superior Toxicology & Wellness, an international scientific consulting firm that he founded.

How did you learn about the behavior of, viruses?

I’ve been in toxicology for 30 plus years and my specialty is exposures scenarios that the human body must endure. Exposure is the broad brush.  That could be chemical exposure, that could be pharmaceutical exposure, that could be exposure to, electromagnetic radiation, that could be 5G, that could be biological exposure or microbial exposure; so the fact that I’ve specialized in exposure of the human body, that’s where my expertise comes in.  Exposure to the biologicals, viruses to specifically the, coronavirus.

  • I opened my own practice and company called, Superior Toxicology and Wellness, providing services helping with the pharmaceutical industry and in chemical exposures. Basically taking care of people, giving them a full toxicological report.
  • The human body has a set amount of defense systems and exposure to the, coronavirus, in particular that’s where the damage starts kicking in.

Before we get into our discussion of the, coronavirus, let’s talk about viruses like the, common coldSARS, Influenza virusMersAIDS virusHerpes virus etc.

  • The, common cold, is a virus actually in a classification called, rhinoviruses, which is actually a sub classification of the, coronavirus, family so they’re all related.
  • Severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS) is a viral respiratory illness started in  … Europe, and Asia before the SARS global outbreak of 2003 was contained.
  • Influenza Virus, commonly known as “the flu“, is an infectious disease caused by an influenza virus. Symptoms can be mild to severe. The most common symptoms include: high fever, runny nose, sore throat, muscle and joint pain, headache, coughing, and feeling tired.
  • Middle East Respiratory Syndrome (MERS) is viral respiratory illness that is new to humans. It was first reported in Saudi Arabia in 2012 and has since spread to other countries.
  • Acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS) is a chronic, potentially life-threatening condition caused by the human immunodeficiency virus(HIV). By damaging your immune system, HIV interferes with your body’s ability to fight infection and disease.
  • The herpes simplex virus, also known as HSV, is an infection that causes herpesHerpes can appear in various parts of the body, most commonly on the genitals or mouth. There are two types of the herpes simplex virus.

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All these viruses consists of a protein coat, the technical scientific word for it is a capsid and this protein coat protects the genetic material which is inside the virus.  The two basic types of virus you have are DNA viruses and RNA viruses.  They have genetic material and they have a protein coat that consists of multiple proteins and this is collectively known as a, viral particle, so that, viral particles, need some sort of a pathway to attach to a host and get into a host cell.  The, coronavirus,  is specifically designed for two things:

  • it’s designed to get into that host cell
  • and it’s designed to avoid getting eliminated.

So the way that happens is that it has an interaction through a specific receptor and with the, coronavirus, that receptor is the 8/2 receptor – stands for angiotensin converting enzyme. That is the gateway for the, coronavirus, to attach to the host cell and get all of the genetic material into that host cell.

The, coronavirus on its own can’t replicate it needs to be in conjunction with the host cell and what the, coronavirus,  does is what all viruses do.  It hijacks the host replicating machinery to make copy after copy of the viral genetic code, so then when that host cell is so loaded with, viral particles,  it virtually bores open and sends new viruses all over the body.

  • The virus that hijacks the cells and uses it to replicate will kill that cell when that starts to happen the body mounts a defense against those, viruses so it’s a battle between how fast can the virus replicate or how fast can the body take out the virus that’s trying to overpower the defense mechanisms of the body the defense mechanism of the body.
  • This is called your, immune system. The, immune system, is the super complex organ system in your body that never gets enough credit, the, immune system, in the human body has the power to ruin your life and it does that when it gets out of whack and starts attacking yourself. This is called autoimmune disease, so it is a  delicate balance of keeping your immune system in check but still powerful enough to battle against viruses.
  • That balance that is generically called, wellness, so you can begin to see how everything is

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When the, virus, is winning over the, immune system,  that’s when you start to see symptoms of the viral illness. The body gets sick and the illness progresses.  The body is spending all kinds of resources to try to fight the viral load the viral replication and it’s also now trying to manage the symptoms of that illness.

The way you intercede pharmacologically that means fancy big words are saying how do you use drugs to attack the, viruses, well you need an antiviral drug or vaccine and usually those types of drugs target those proteins that are in that protein coat that’s around the genetic material or they try to halt the viral replication in the cell.

  • We sacrifice the one cell to stop the viral replication and if we’re going after the protein coat that’s usually the targets of, vaccines,
  • It’s difficult to make a vaccine that’s why there’s no cure for the, common cold, because those proteins in that coat are continually and rapidly mutating. You have to have something stable to develop a vaccine to fight that viral infection and if the mutation rate is too fast there’s not a target that’s around long enough to design that vaccine against.

How does the, Influenza virus, vaccine work?

The way to describe this is let’s say you have a bucket of, flu viruses,  and there’s a hundred different kinds in there.  The look at historic data about emergence of these different viruses historically over time and they’re trying to predict the best case scenario for which, flu virus,  is going to break out and run through the human population in any given year. So what they do is they take the top three that will most likely to break out, flu viruses, and they formulate that season vaccine to those three viruses.  There’s no guarantee that they’re getting it right.  There’s no guarantee that it’s going to be effective and it’s always going to be a best-guess scenario.  It’s still a good idea to get a flu shot because more times than not, one of those flu viruses that they have in that mixture is going to the one.

Why does the, coronavirus, affect the elderly population?

I’m understanding why the people who are dying from the, coronavirus,  so far are the elderly or are sick people who have compromised, immune systems,  because the, immune system,  can’t fight the, coronavirus, as fast as their bodies are making these duplicates.

What they’ve seen in the population statistics are the people at the greatest risk are the people that are 70 years old or older or those that have pre-existing medical conditions,  respiratory effects, cardiac effects.  Those  folks with those types of medical problems are particularly at risk and those are the ones that should absolutely adhere to every one of the guidelines being put out.  Stay away from crowds, keep your hands washed, do not touch any common surfaces where this infection could be because they have the least amount of capacity to fight and survive this particular viral infection.

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What makes the, coronavirus, so infectious?

If I had to answer that with  one word that word would be, infectivity.

Basically the difference between the, coronavirus, COVID-19, this year’s poster child for pandemic is  the  amount of people that got this infection and how easily it spreads from person to person to person.

This is the key that sets it apart from other, viruses, like, common cold, SARS, Influenza virus, Mers, AIDS virus, Herpes virus, Ebola virus,  etc.

The infectivity rate of the, coronavirus,  COVID-19 is much greater and much more aggressive than viruses, that have been available in the past or attacked  humans in the past.  So in one word it would be its infectious nature.  That’s what sets the, coronavirus, apart; but the reason that is  because of the gateway that, coronavirus, gets into the host cells it’s the ace 2 receptors.  (Angiotensin converting enzyme 2.)

  • Humans have these receptors on your heart, on your lungs, on your kidney, on your liver, on all of your blood vessels, and in a high propensity in your oral cavity, your mouth, your tongue, your cheek, your throat, your airways; so whenever there is any viral particles, let’s say somebody that gets less than 6 feet away from you sneezes and you can feel the droplets on your face well you also have those receptors in your mouth, and your throat ,and all of those droplets if that person is infected is just chock-full of, coronavirus, and those viruses bind to those receptors in and around wherever they can get in your body and then start that process of replicating.
  • Smokers have a higher level of the ACE2 receptors, so they are more susceptible to the, coronavirus.
  • The virus invokes an inflammation response, so what happens is the virus gets in and it triggers your, immune system, your, immune system,  calls for the cavalry and the cavalry consists your t-cells that’s your b-cells and all of your other leukocytes, your white blood cells, come rushing to wherever this space is that this attack is going on and the your body is mounting a mass inflammation response to try to kill whatever is there in this case it’s the, corona virus.
  • The problem is the things that go awry is that when your, immune system, gets completely overzealous and calls in everything it has to launch an inflammation reaction that’s bigger than it needs, it loses the braking mechanism if you will and what you have is called a cytokine storm. That cytokine storm produces such an inflammation reaction that it runs through your cellular protective mechanisms.  Your lungs get flooded and your organs start to shut down.

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You can get multiple organ failure over a very short period of time.  If the person is going into cytokine storm because of the, coronavirus, infection, it’s a very bleak picture.  It’s very painful and the people have to have very intense resource intensive medical care if they’re going to have a chance to survive.

The, coronavirus, can be symptom-free up to 14 days and I’ve seen some evidence that suggests it could be 24 to 28 days without symptoms.  What’s going on at that time is there’s a fight raging in your body between the, coronavirus, and the, immune system,  if the, immune system, wins then that person never shows symptoms; but is still was infected and give it to other people.

The other thing which you hear repeatedly in the media, is that you have to  be careful because this, coronavirus, can live on surfaces for up to nine days. Think about this as you grab the grocery cart handle and the gas pump, then after touching those services how many times do you scratch your nose or touch your eye.

 

How to Protect yourself against the, coronavirus?

  • You have to protect yourself against infection the best defense is avoiding infection in the first place.
  • That’s barrier protection that’s avoiding the crowds
  • That’s keeping your common areas clean
  • That’s washing after you touch common areas
  • It’s just not doing anything stupid
  • Make sure you’re in top physical condition
  • you know I mean just make sure
  • Make sure you’re hydrated
  • Make sure that you’re getting enough sleep
  • Make sure that you’re eating a good diet not a bunch of processed food
  • Eat a diet of half or mostly plants and you’re going to be okay
  • Practice Wellness

I was listening to Dr. Deepak Chopra give advice on the, coronavirus,  and he talked about having a healthy lifestyle that included, meditation, exercise, and  nutrition.

What is your wellness program to prevent the, Coronavirus?

  • Meditation is tremendous, it’s the power of the mind. You absolutely have to have a positive outlook and you have to be thinking about how you want things to be, not how you dread things could be.
  • Exercise the promotes a healthy body, it helps you to eliminate toxins and gives your body an avenue to eliminate things. Exercise increases your body temperature and it produces the sweat and it increases the circulation to the lymph system, which is your garbage disposal in the body.  Which helps to eliminate toxins.  Exercise gives you the sense of well-being.  I try to do something active every day.
  • Nutrition like I said right before eat half and mostly plants and you’re going to be okay. There’s actually some new research out there that shows after going 90 days on a vegan diet that you change the transcription of 500 different genes in your body, some of them for promoting wellness and others for preventing disease.  It just unlocks your body’s ability to engage with the consciousness of the universe.

One product that I have found that builds up your, immune system, and I’ve written a paper for non-scientific people is called C60 complete from livelongerlabs.com.

Its carbon 60, which is the world’s most efficient antioxidant.  Having carbon 60 on board can help to stop that cytokine storm that happens when you’re when your inflammation response goes haywire and the other two ingredients in C60 complete are black seed oil and curcumin. Those two are very powerful natural products that have been around for centuries in the herbal medicine circles.

The other programs that I like are on my website Superior Toxicology and Wellness.  Click on the HOPE button, HOPE stands for, Health Optimization Prescription Evaluation.  Those folks who are on multiple drug products and think they have no way out of that polypharmacy because one doctor put them on one thing and the next doctor put them on the next thing and the third doctor put them on something else and none of those doctors took the time to look at what they were already on,  I’ll do that for you.  I’ll be that pharmaceutical advocate and give you the questions that you can ask your doctors to say.  Do I really need to be on these drugs or why am I on these drugs. Because if you can eliminate the drugs and give your body what it needs to function optimally, you’re going to give yourself the best case scenario to fight off these pandemics.

This year it’s, coronavirus, before it was, SARS,  before it was, Ebola virus, it’s always something killing humanity about every two years.

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Additional Resources, coronavirus

Novel coronavirus, is among the family of, coronaviruses, that cause illnesses that range from the common cold to Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome (SARS). Until last year, the new strain had never before been seen in humans.

Symptoms of the infection include serious respiratory illness often with additional fever, cough, and difficulty breathing. Currently there is no cure nor a vaccine for the infections, so physicians treat patients based on their symptoms. Some patients come down with a bad case of pneumonia or kidney failure. Gastrointestinal problems, like diarrhea, have also been reported.

People who already have underlying health conditions may be more susceptible to the infection, and their symptoms may be different from  the majority of cases — for example, they may not experience respiratory problems.

Novel Coronavirus: 5 Things To Know About the SARS-Like Infection

 

Using the Law of Attraction to Have it All

Nothing in our world exists until we create it. We engage the, Law of Attraction, whenever we dream about something we want.

Everything is first created in the mind before you hold it in your hand. We engage the, laws of the Universe, when we hold desire in our hearts.

 

How to engage the, Law of Attraction

You can, have it all, anything you desire through visualization and meditation. The,  Laws of the Universe, including the, law of attraction, are working for you.  You only have to plant in the fertile field of your mind to ,have it all.

Your subconscious mind cannot hold any contradictory mandates. For example if you are using the, Law of Attraction, to manifest a red sports car, but you are thinking that you could never afford such a car, you are cancelling out, the Law of Attraction.

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If you have a belief that you will not be able to, have it all,  then your beliefs will block these things from your experience. You will not, have it all. Your belief must be changed first in order to, have it all.

Nothing in our world exists until we create it. We engage the, Law of Attraction, one of the, laws of the Universe, whenever we dream about something we want.

Everything is first created in the mind before you hold it in your hand.

We must first observe or experience it for it to become a reality. Quantum physics tells us that everything exists in wave form or infinite possibility it is only when we observe it, it becomes form.  It does not become form until we observe it by giving it our conscious attention.  It is our act of observation that gives everything form.

Consciousness creates our reality. The, Law of Attraction, is a tool we could use to design our life, to have it all.

Mind affects matter.

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The first thing that the, Law of Attraction, does is change the self and the environment the self-encounters.

Everything we see, touch, smell, hear, feel, is sensory input.

The subconscious stores these sensory input along with events for later retrieval.

The subconscious mind makes up 92% of the total brain and the conscious mind the remaining 8%

The brain produces about 25 watts of power.

The subconscious mind uses this power for desires, impulses and energy.

Your desires activate the, Law of Attraction, one of the, laws of the Universe,

This energy is infinite.  The brain functions 24 hours until we die, so the, law of Attraction, is always working.  Both your conscious thoughts and subconscious thoughts activate, the Law of Attraction.

When the conscious mind and the subconscious mind are in conflict the subconscious mind always win. So most of the time we are activating the, law of attraction unconsciously.

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Meaning of life, how to have it all
Meaning of life

Did you start your New Year’s resolutions yet? I bet there’s one missing that you should add right now: find a greater sense of purpose in your life. To do that effectively, you need to understand the eight key components of living with purpose.

The new book, The Meaning of Life: A guide to finding your life’s purpose by Nathanael Garrett Novosel, is a complete step-by-step walkthrough of how humans derive meaning from their existence. This book helps you to identify what really matters to you in life, define a clear plan of going after what you want, and grow toward fulfilling your true calling.

Best of all, this book does not tell you how to live your life or which goals you should have. Instead, it helps you figure it out for yourself. ..That’s what you really want—someone in your corner helping you make sense of your life, not someone with their own agenda telling you what to do.

This book is a life-changer, and I recommend you go out and get it now. The Meaning of Life: A guide to finding your life’s purpose by Nathanael Garrett Novosel. Available now on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Apple Books. Order today!

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For example when an overweight person decides to go on a diet without changing subconscious programming they will continue to overeat and override conscious behaviors.

The conscious mind has a limited memory and most of it is short term.

The subconscious mind has infinite memory for all your experience for your entire life.

The subconscious mind can block out changes in your surroundings so you don’t focus or see changes in your environment. Like driving down a street for months and not seeing a new complex or a new tree.

We have a shortage of attention and fail to notice what is going on around us including obvious changes in our surroundings.

Conscious attention is required to see requested changes from the, Law of Attraction.

Always use the, law of attraction, to focus on what is wanted and not what is unwanted. You can, have it all.

The law of Attraction, having it all
The law of Attraction, having it all

The mind focus on what we place our attention on whether negative or positive so the, law of attraction will bring you whatever you focus on.

All day every day we are placing our attention on something and engaging the, law of attraction.

Concentration on one thing and suppressing all others is the key to controlling your reality and using the, law of attraction, to, have it all.

Controlling your attention and focus is the way to control your reality.

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How to use the, Law of Attraction, to change your reality

  1. Reevaluate what seems negative by focusing on the good experiences. This trains the mind only to see the positive, it teaches the subconscious to only focus on the positive and thus more positive things will be attracted into your lives through the, law of attraction.
  2. Challenge yourself in your free time. When we go into low energy modes our brain reverts to old programming, so to prevent this schedule things to do that will move the needle to your required destination of, having it all.
  3. Appreciate all the goodness that you see. We can search for happiness in our present situation. Teach the mind what we want from life. The conscious mind is the master and the subconscious mind the gene. When we train the conscious mind to focus on what we want, we can make any changes we want in our lives. What you focus on comes to you by the, law of attraction.

You can, have it all. Is it possible to have: a passionate marriage; a thriving career; a healthy beautiful body; more money than you ever dreamed possible, and enough “down” time to enjoy it – without running yourself ragged? Use the, law of attraction to, have it all.

In her book “The Art of Having It All,”  Author, Transformational Leader, and Celebrity Coach, Christy Whitman, share the precise steps she took to create radical turnarounds in the midst of potentially devastating real life situations – including freeing herself from nearly $90,000 of unwanted debt loosing 30 extra pounds,  navigating the turbulent waters of divorce, the grief of her sister’s suicide, and the life -threatening illness of her newborn son.

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Addition Resources: Law of Attraction

https://www.collaborativefund.com/blog/laws/

https://daviddanielbooks.com/the-12-universal-laws/

 

How to be Happy: The Happiness Formula

Are you Happy? Today Dr Ahia, Psychologist and I discuss, How to be Happy. Their is a mathematical formula for, happiness. H=S +C + V

The, happiness formula, is a mathematical equation on, how to be happy.

  • What does it take to be happy?
  • To answer that question you have to understand your blueprint for, happiness.
  • Your blueprint is the story you have in your head about how life is supposed to be.
  • The most popular archetype is the blueprint that says you have to be successful to find, happiness.
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Here is a Test to see your Capacity for, Happiness:

  • What is an area in your life that you feel happy about?
  • Then ask yourself, why are you happy with that area?
  • You could find, happiness,  in your body, your marriage, your career, your friends, your finances, your kids, your relationship with God etc.
  • If your Life Conditions or LC match your blueprint for, happiness, you will find, happiness,  in this area.

 

Let’s pick an easy one to see, how to be happy, I am sure you know people who are happy with being overweight.

They find, happiness, with their body because their blueprint says,  Big is Beautiful.   They love being Big.  You may also know someone who is a twig and they feel fat. You become unhappy with your body when you step on the scale and it is different than your blueprint for, happiness, with your weight or body.

  • While you are in this space you can also get clarity on why you are Unhappy with some areas of your life.
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The Happiness Formula, How to be Happy

  • Happiness, is defined as a feeling of contentment, that life is as it should be. Perfect, happiness, comes when you have all your needs met according to your blueprint of what life should be.

 

  • Here is the formula on, How to be Happy

  • H=S +C + V
  • Happiness is “H”
  • S – Set point or genetic capacity for happiness
  • C- Conditions or circumstances of living
  • V – Voluntary choices

 

  • Your Set point is both genetic and environmental. Do you see life as an opportunity or do you see life as a problem?
  • Your set point for, happiness, is determined in the first 3 years of life by parents or caretakers. Your neurons mirror your parents. If your parents were always criticizing each other or playing the victim; that’s what you grow up to be. A critical person always seeing the glass as half empty instead of half full. You feel victimized by life. You blame the system for your lack of, happiness, in life. You feel you were born on the other side of the tracks.
  • On the other hand If your parents were happy, then you grew up thinking that life is a place for service and to look for the silver lining under every cloud. Never being the victim because victims have no power. Your set point on, how to be happy, if pretty high.
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Can you find, Happiness?

  • Your set point represents 50% of your, happiness, so if you have a negative set point, you are always fighting an uphill battle.
  • Fortunately, your set point for, happiness, and contains the formula on, how to be happy, can be changed  through therapy?
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The second factor in the, Happiness Formula is your capacity for happiness or your Life Conditions “C”

  • C = Conditions of living – conditions of living represents 10 -12% of your, happiness. For example If you are extremely poor you can’t be happy because your basic needs are not being met and your poverty becomes a source of stress.
  • There is a movie I saw years ago on, how to be happy, called the, Happiness, movie. It showcased people in India living in very poor conditions, earning something like $100 per year and they found, happiness.
  • How to be happy,  they had love, they had family and since poverty is what they knew from birth, their blueprint for, happiness,  was different than someone born into wealth.
  • Do you know poor people who are happy? I am sure you do.
  • When your Life conditions don’t match your blueprint that is when you suffer. Stress, depression, substance abuse this is the doorway they enter from. Not always but most times.

 

  • The next leg on, How to be Happy,  is “V”

  • V = Voluntary Choices in, how to be happy, These are the choices you make every day =these choices represent 40% of your, happiness.
  • If your choices are all about personal pleasure then your, happiness, will be transient.
  • In the US the #1 choice for personal pleasure is shopping
  • #2 is alcohol and  food
  • # 3 sex
  • When you make choices for personal pleasure your, happiness, lasts a few days or a few months at best. If you are trying to find, happiness, by acquiring things like cars, clothes, houses, jewelry.  The, happiness, lasts a few weeks or at best 6 months then it is no longer a source of joy.
  • This is the same for alcohol, food, drugs, sex.
  • Lasting, Happiness, does not come from external sources.
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  • If you are suffering in your marriage, your relationships, or anything other than your health, you can change your blueprint and find, happiness. If you feel you have no control to change your Life conditions, that is when there is pain.
  • You can change your set point through meditation and expanding your consciousness.
  • If you don’t like your conditions of living or your body, change it. It is in your control. If you don’t want to change your conditions then you must change your blueprint.
  • When I first got married my husband and I fought constantly. We had different blueprints of what marriage was supposed to be. We are still together today because we both changed our blueprints. Most couples end up in divorce court because they refuse to change their blueprint of what it take to find, happiness, in a marriage.
  • Instead of making the choice of personal pleasure, spend your money or time on experiences like vacations, adventure, entertainment, being social with friends etc. Creating Good memories make you happy.
  • The fastest way to, happiness, is to give others attention, appreciation, acknowledgment, affection, or acceptance.
  • Before you make choices, ask yourself would this choice make me happy? Will it make others happy? You cannot find, happiness, making others unhappy.
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Additional Resources The Happiness Formula

How to Heal Your Brokenness

Using Reiki to Heal your Mind and Body

The Secret to Living the Life of your Dreams

Positive Psychology and the Science of Happiness

 

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